Excited/confused
So I finished He's Just Not That Into You ... greatest book ever. I'm so excited now. Anywho, I'm really excited about something else, I'm going to be a Nouna (godmother)!!! My dad's cousin is married to a Army soldier and they have four kids and none of them are baptized and they recently moved back to Cali and they decided it was finally time to baptize them. So she called and asked if I wanted to baptize their 9 year old daughter. I'm so excited!! The baptism is Dec. 4th so I have to look good by then, haha. I was a little scared at first because you have to go in front of the whole church and read Greek and do all this stuff, but then I found out that my Thia (aunt) and two of my other cousins are baptizing the other kids so I won't be alone. Well other then that, life has been pretty good. I had a dream about someone last night and it made me a little sad and bitter when I woke up this morning. It made me remember the past and everything that happened and it was just hard I guess because I don't even talk to that person anymore. To be honest, I dont even really know what happened .... I wish that I did. I have so many unanswered questions that I know I'll never get answered. This past month has just been numbing for me. I try to stay busy and be happy so that I can't remember and so that I'm not sad, but its getting hard. There are always constant reminders of the past and I just don't know how to deal. I just wish that I could either go back and do everything different so that I never could have gotten hurt or I wish that things could just go back to the way that they were, when all of us were friends and there wasn't any drama, but I know neither will ever happen, I just have to get used to it I suppose. Oh well, there is nothing I can do about it. I tried of always carrying the burden of things when they go wrong .... I'm just too tired of it all .....