Sitting here trying to entertain myself with this old guitar.
I called in sick to work today. Just didn't feel up to it. Yeah, yeah, I'm a bad person.
Trouble is, I knew that T, the guy I work with, wasn't going to be in. I get on really well with him these days - we're just really relaxed around each other now and have the same kind of attitude towards work. He lets me take double my allowed lunch break (since I'm only there six hours, and he's there eight, he gets an hour for lunch whereas I'm only supposed to have half an hour) and I let him go off for a bit of a wander or to run errands he has to do whenever he feels like. In between times, we moan about how boring work is, play random games, sing and recite bits of services (he wants to be a priest) and bitch about the customers and the other staff. I actually don't even dread work very much these days. That's a really bizarre thing to realise.
And then last week T told me that he wasn't going to be in this weekend because he's going home to Lincoln for Mother's Day (he's only in Chester for Uni). It's been bothering me all week. I don't know who I would have been working with, but I know that 1. they would probably be old (T and I are the only two members off staff on our section that are under twenty five, there are two who I would guess are around thirty but they don't usually cover on Saturdays and the rest of our section's staff are all pensioners) and 2. whoever they were, I wouldn't feel relaxed with them, and I would hate the entire day. So I've been panicking all week and today I decided that I just wouldn't go in.
It's not been a great day so far. I'm in that horrible kind of state where I feel really restless, but also feel like I don't have enough energy to actually do anything. Gah.
It's been an odd week. I had to get my ass into gear and actually do some Drama coursework, because it basically has to be sent off in like a week and before then my teacher has to mark it, I have to make alterations and she has to mark it again. So. I've been getting up at half six every morning to spend an hour on it before breakfast, actually working in some of my study periods and spending most of my evenings desperately trying to concentrate enough to get it done. I managed to hand in the first half at the end of Thursday, but I haven't gotten any further since then. I promised I'd have the rest in by Monday, so I really ought to get on with it. Yeah.
I guess it's been what we call an "up" week or two - getting lots and lots done (in comparison to my usual amount, that is) and being busy busy busy. Only in myself, in my head, it's been...just weird, really. I guess I've been going through the motions of getting stuff done but my head just isn't really with it. With being so focused on trying to focus on the school work, I've not really been thinking about much else adequately. Like people. I've not been texting/emailing/myspace-ing people back very well, for instance. Apologies to both Mr Reaper and Mr Wild-Cat, both of whom I've failed to text back on at least one occasion each. I'm sorry. My body is busy and my head is dead.
Trouble is, I knew that T, the guy I work with, wasn't going to be in. I get on really well with him these days - we're just really relaxed around each other now and have the same kind of attitude towards work. He lets me take double my allowed lunch break (since I'm only there six hours, and he's there eight, he gets an hour for lunch whereas I'm only supposed to have half an hour) and I let him go off for a bit of a wander or to run errands he has to do whenever he feels like. In between times, we moan about how boring work is, play random games, sing and recite bits of services (he wants to be a priest) and bitch about the customers and the other staff. I actually don't even dread work very much these days. That's a really bizarre thing to realise.
And then last week T told me that he wasn't going to be in this weekend because he's going home to Lincoln for Mother's Day (he's only in Chester for Uni). It's been bothering me all week. I don't know who I would have been working with, but I know that 1. they would probably be old (T and I are the only two members off staff on our section that are under twenty five, there are two who I would guess are around thirty but they don't usually cover on Saturdays and the rest of our section's staff are all pensioners) and 2. whoever they were, I wouldn't feel relaxed with them, and I would hate the entire day. So I've been panicking all week and today I decided that I just wouldn't go in.
It's not been a great day so far. I'm in that horrible kind of state where I feel really restless, but also feel like I don't have enough energy to actually do anything. Gah.
It's been an odd week. I had to get my ass into gear and actually do some Drama coursework, because it basically has to be sent off in like a week and before then my teacher has to mark it, I have to make alterations and she has to mark it again. So. I've been getting up at half six every morning to spend an hour on it before breakfast, actually working in some of my study periods and spending most of my evenings desperately trying to concentrate enough to get it done. I managed to hand in the first half at the end of Thursday, but I haven't gotten any further since then. I promised I'd have the rest in by Monday, so I really ought to get on with it. Yeah.
I guess it's been what we call an "up" week or two - getting lots and lots done (in comparison to my usual amount, that is) and being busy busy busy. Only in myself, in my head, it's been...just weird, really. I guess I've been going through the motions of getting stuff done but my head just isn't really with it. With being so focused on trying to focus on the school work, I've not really been thinking about much else adequately. Like people. I've not been texting/emailing/myspace-ing people back very well, for instance. Apologies to both Mr Reaper and Mr Wild-Cat, both of whom I've failed to text back on at least one occasion each. I'm sorry. My body is busy and my head is dead.