more surgery
GigaBite67: hey, do you mind if i kinda vent to you for a few?
urimagineryfrend: no i do that to u all the time lol
GigaBite67: cuz i'm kinda feeling upset
GigaBite67: lol
GigaBite67: ok, so did you hear about the whole surgery bit?
urimagineryfrend: well i kno ur gonna have to get it
GigaBite67: well i went to an orthopedic surgeon on the 10th, and after examining my x-rays and such, he was explaining the surgery he wanted to do
urimagineryfrend: so wait is the problem just that u have flat feet?
urimagineryfrend: or is it a lot more?
GigaBite67: which in a nutshell is 2 hrs of surgery per foot w/ a 6 week recovery period on crutches, meaning it's 3 months i can't walk
GigaBite67: yeah, flat feet
GigaBite67: but there's other stuff that accompany the flat feet
GigaBite67: like my gastrocnemius (sp??) is really tight and my heel bone isn't lining up right
urimagineryfrend: woa that's a super long time
GigaBite67: i know
GigaBite67: so i'm really stressed about this, ya know?
GigaBite67: especially since I'm leaving for college in cali in 28 days
urimagineryfrend: wait he wants to do it now??
urimagineryfrend: i thought it was next summer
GigaBite67: so my options would be to do it during school which would be super hard, or take a summer off which i really didn't want to do because I was planning on taking advantage of the research available
GigaBite67: yeah
GigaBite67: it's a choice, he wants to do it asap
GigaBite67: so as stressed as I am about this, my mom is making it sooooo much worse
GigaBite67: because she keeps trying to basically convince either herself or both of us that I shouldn't have the surgery
GigaBite67: since she doesn't understand what's going on
GigaBite67: like she was talking to sneha's mom, who commented that she didn't think the knee pain was necessessarily coming from my feet, and then she told my mom, "try walking"
GigaBite67: which may work well for stiff knees, but in my experience walking actually triggers it
GigaBite67: like if i spend a whole day walking at cedar point, as the day progresses, the pain gets worse and worse (and there's hardly any when i'm immobile)
GigaBite67: so i don't think that could possibly be it
GigaBite67: but granted i'm not a doctor
urimagineryfrend: right but walking obviously doesn't take the pain away
GigaBite67: and so we're out at dinner and she was like, "maybe it's stress that is causing it"
GigaBite67: no, it doesn't
GigaBite67: and i'm thinking, "how does stress have anything to do with this?"
GigaBite67: and just she keeps making up these things, which I don't know if they're excuses or if she's really trying to help
GigaBite67: but she's really slow on calling another doctor
GigaBite67: so i just get the feeling like she really doesn't understand
urimagineryfrend: oh i see... yea hmm that's tough
GigaBite67: and i mean you kinda have to understand what she's going through, my grandparents are really ill/immobile, my aunts being evicted from her house, and there are all these problems my mom has to deal with and I can tell she doesn't want to deal with mine
GigaBite67: cuz she yelled at me today and said, "You're 18, can't you see that other people have problems too?"
GigaBite67: and yes, i can
GigaBite67: but it's like I have this problem to deal with which my mom doesn't want to deal with and I really need help with it
GigaBite67: so i'm really frustrated
GigaBite67: and to tell you the truth, it's really scary the prospect of having to go through this, and so I really want to figure out what I'm going to do. If I'm either going to do it or not, either way, I'd really like to know what I'm up against
GigaBite67: and she keeps shirking it off
GigaBite67: so yeah, i'm just really upset right now
urimagineryfrend: yea she's prolly scared too so she's prolly just trying to put it off
urimagineryfrend: i mean most ppl don't make the wisest decisions under stress
urimagineryfrend: do u know if u have to have the surgery?
urimagineryfrend: or are there other ways?
GigaBite67: well what this last doctor indicated, and i'm going to get a second oppinion, is that surgery is really the only way. He said the orthotics I have aren't really doing it, which I knew otherwise I wouldn't be going to see surgeons. My mom also asked about doing things like stretches or anything which he said he was 99% sure wouldn't do anything. He said the only other slightly possible solution would be these new orthotic-type things. The problem is not just my arch, it's that my bones in my ankle aren't lining up and that my muscle is so tight that it's deforming my joints. Anyway, this orthotic thingy is like a boot apparently, it comes above the ankle. He said the problem with that is that it's very unclear whether it would do anything since it's relatively new and therefore he's never had anyone try it before. He strongly discouraged it, lets just say that.
urimagineryfrend: oh ok
urimagineryfrend: i suppose if its other things too, then it makes it harder
GigaBite67: yeah
urimagineryfrend: cuz when u wear stuff, it usually just targets one area and all
GigaBite67: exactly
urimagineryfrend: but yea that sounds kinda scary
urimagineryfrend: um like u said a 2nd opinion is def good
GigaBite67: yeah, i know
GigaBite67: but my mom's so slow to do it
GigaBite67: since I really *should* know before i leave
GigaBite67: so i can make arrangements if necessary
GigaBite67: (like taking a room on the 1st floor)
GigaBite67: so it's getting frustrating
GigaBite67: like she seems to be spending more time trying to help my aunt, who's not even really my aunt, actually just a family friend, and just shrugging me off
GigaBite67: not that she shouldn't try to help her...
GigaBite67: just that I need help too
urimagineryfrend: yea i see
urimagineryfrend: sry im not being more helpful, but i wouldn't know how to react in ur case :-(
GigaBite67: it's ok, i just kinda need to vent
GigaBite67: cuz it's so frustrating
GigaBite67: and my mom's getting mad at me it seems for all this, and not supporting me when i'm really upset about this whole thing in the first place
GigaBite67: i mean it seems really lose-lose.... either I get the surgery and suffer through it, or I don't and get arthritis and more chronic pain up through my lower back
urimagineryfrend: yea i suppose if i were u, if theres no other way i'd just get the surgery
GigaBite67: that's how i feel, i mean at least it would be a 1-time thing and it would be over. The surgeon was telling me I should get it asap because it's going to get worse over time, and he said if it does i may be looking at fusing joints or something equally as aweful
urimagineryfrend: oh ouch
GigaBite67: i know
GigaBite67: it's like walking on egg shells, i swear
urimagineryfrend: can u do research during the school year?
GigaBite67: yeah, but it's tough to do, at least until jr. year because of core
GigaBite67: that's not to say you can't since it is done, but it's tough
GigaBite67: so it's mostly done over the summer
urimagineryfrend: oh hmm
urimagineryfrend: can u get the surgery at the beginning of summer and go back and do research at the end?
GigaBite67: it's a 6 week recovery period for each foot though, so there really wouldn't be any time
GigaBite67: but what has to be done, has to be done, ya know?
urimagineryfrend: yea def, specially if it's something like surgery
GigaBite67: yeah, really
GigaBite67: life goes on
GigaBite67: but i dont want to mess w/ my health
urimagineryfrend: right health comes first
urimagineryfrend: haha that sounds like my mom
GigaBite67: yah
GigaBite67: lol
urimagineryfrend: but yea totally true
urimagineryfrend: ok i need to go to bed now
urimagineryfrend: but good luck w your situation
GigaBite67: alright
GigaBite67: thanks for listening :-)
urimagineryfrend: no i do that to u all the time lol
GigaBite67: cuz i'm kinda feeling upset
GigaBite67: lol
GigaBite67: ok, so did you hear about the whole surgery bit?
urimagineryfrend: well i kno ur gonna have to get it
GigaBite67: well i went to an orthopedic surgeon on the 10th, and after examining my x-rays and such, he was explaining the surgery he wanted to do
urimagineryfrend: so wait is the problem just that u have flat feet?
urimagineryfrend: or is it a lot more?
GigaBite67: which in a nutshell is 2 hrs of surgery per foot w/ a 6 week recovery period on crutches, meaning it's 3 months i can't walk
GigaBite67: yeah, flat feet
GigaBite67: but there's other stuff that accompany the flat feet
GigaBite67: like my gastrocnemius (sp??) is really tight and my heel bone isn't lining up right
urimagineryfrend: woa that's a super long time
GigaBite67: i know
GigaBite67: so i'm really stressed about this, ya know?
GigaBite67: especially since I'm leaving for college in cali in 28 days
urimagineryfrend: wait he wants to do it now??
urimagineryfrend: i thought it was next summer
GigaBite67: so my options would be to do it during school which would be super hard, or take a summer off which i really didn't want to do because I was planning on taking advantage of the research available
GigaBite67: yeah
GigaBite67: it's a choice, he wants to do it asap
GigaBite67: so as stressed as I am about this, my mom is making it sooooo much worse
GigaBite67: because she keeps trying to basically convince either herself or both of us that I shouldn't have the surgery
GigaBite67: since she doesn't understand what's going on
GigaBite67: like she was talking to sneha's mom, who commented that she didn't think the knee pain was necessessarily coming from my feet, and then she told my mom, "try walking"
GigaBite67: which may work well for stiff knees, but in my experience walking actually triggers it
GigaBite67: like if i spend a whole day walking at cedar point, as the day progresses, the pain gets worse and worse (and there's hardly any when i'm immobile)
GigaBite67: so i don't think that could possibly be it
GigaBite67: but granted i'm not a doctor
urimagineryfrend: right but walking obviously doesn't take the pain away
GigaBite67: and so we're out at dinner and she was like, "maybe it's stress that is causing it"
GigaBite67: no, it doesn't
GigaBite67: and i'm thinking, "how does stress have anything to do with this?"
GigaBite67: and just she keeps making up these things, which I don't know if they're excuses or if she's really trying to help
GigaBite67: but she's really slow on calling another doctor
GigaBite67: so i just get the feeling like she really doesn't understand
urimagineryfrend: oh i see... yea hmm that's tough
GigaBite67: and i mean you kinda have to understand what she's going through, my grandparents are really ill/immobile, my aunts being evicted from her house, and there are all these problems my mom has to deal with and I can tell she doesn't want to deal with mine
GigaBite67: cuz she yelled at me today and said, "You're 18, can't you see that other people have problems too?"
GigaBite67: and yes, i can
GigaBite67: but it's like I have this problem to deal with which my mom doesn't want to deal with and I really need help with it
GigaBite67: so i'm really frustrated
GigaBite67: and to tell you the truth, it's really scary the prospect of having to go through this, and so I really want to figure out what I'm going to do. If I'm either going to do it or not, either way, I'd really like to know what I'm up against
GigaBite67: and she keeps shirking it off
GigaBite67: so yeah, i'm just really upset right now
urimagineryfrend: yea she's prolly scared too so she's prolly just trying to put it off
urimagineryfrend: i mean most ppl don't make the wisest decisions under stress
urimagineryfrend: do u know if u have to have the surgery?
urimagineryfrend: or are there other ways?
GigaBite67: well what this last doctor indicated, and i'm going to get a second oppinion, is that surgery is really the only way. He said the orthotics I have aren't really doing it, which I knew otherwise I wouldn't be going to see surgeons. My mom also asked about doing things like stretches or anything which he said he was 99% sure wouldn't do anything. He said the only other slightly possible solution would be these new orthotic-type things. The problem is not just my arch, it's that my bones in my ankle aren't lining up and that my muscle is so tight that it's deforming my joints. Anyway, this orthotic thingy is like a boot apparently, it comes above the ankle. He said the problem with that is that it's very unclear whether it would do anything since it's relatively new and therefore he's never had anyone try it before. He strongly discouraged it, lets just say that.
urimagineryfrend: oh ok
urimagineryfrend: i suppose if its other things too, then it makes it harder
GigaBite67: yeah
urimagineryfrend: cuz when u wear stuff, it usually just targets one area and all
GigaBite67: exactly
urimagineryfrend: but yea that sounds kinda scary
urimagineryfrend: um like u said a 2nd opinion is def good
GigaBite67: yeah, i know
GigaBite67: but my mom's so slow to do it
GigaBite67: since I really *should* know before i leave
GigaBite67: so i can make arrangements if necessary
GigaBite67: (like taking a room on the 1st floor)
GigaBite67: so it's getting frustrating
GigaBite67: like she seems to be spending more time trying to help my aunt, who's not even really my aunt, actually just a family friend, and just shrugging me off
GigaBite67: not that she shouldn't try to help her...
GigaBite67: just that I need help too
urimagineryfrend: yea i see
urimagineryfrend: sry im not being more helpful, but i wouldn't know how to react in ur case :-(
GigaBite67: it's ok, i just kinda need to vent
GigaBite67: cuz it's so frustrating
GigaBite67: and my mom's getting mad at me it seems for all this, and not supporting me when i'm really upset about this whole thing in the first place
GigaBite67: i mean it seems really lose-lose.... either I get the surgery and suffer through it, or I don't and get arthritis and more chronic pain up through my lower back
urimagineryfrend: yea i suppose if i were u, if theres no other way i'd just get the surgery
GigaBite67: that's how i feel, i mean at least it would be a 1-time thing and it would be over. The surgeon was telling me I should get it asap because it's going to get worse over time, and he said if it does i may be looking at fusing joints or something equally as aweful
urimagineryfrend: oh ouch
GigaBite67: i know
GigaBite67: it's like walking on egg shells, i swear
urimagineryfrend: can u do research during the school year?
GigaBite67: yeah, but it's tough to do, at least until jr. year because of core
GigaBite67: that's not to say you can't since it is done, but it's tough
GigaBite67: so it's mostly done over the summer
urimagineryfrend: oh hmm
urimagineryfrend: can u get the surgery at the beginning of summer and go back and do research at the end?
GigaBite67: it's a 6 week recovery period for each foot though, so there really wouldn't be any time
GigaBite67: but what has to be done, has to be done, ya know?
urimagineryfrend: yea def, specially if it's something like surgery
GigaBite67: yeah, really
GigaBite67: life goes on
GigaBite67: but i dont want to mess w/ my health
urimagineryfrend: right health comes first
urimagineryfrend: haha that sounds like my mom
GigaBite67: yah
GigaBite67: lol
urimagineryfrend: but yea totally true
urimagineryfrend: ok i need to go to bed now
urimagineryfrend: but good luck w your situation
GigaBite67: alright
GigaBite67: thanks for listening :-)