(no subject)
Today I woke up and took a pee. I peed on the seat on purpose, and then left the seat up. Becky came in to take a crap, and she fell in the toilet. Then, when she put the seat down, she sat in my pee. She asked me why I did that...and then she realized I was Uncle Jesse. Then she went and sat in the pee again. Then I bleached the laces for my white tennis shoes. They got really clean, so I took the bleach and spelled out "butt-lord" on Danny Tanner's front lawn. Then I went back to my house and built a snowman with really sweet hair. It was summer, so there wasn't any snow, but I made Joey Gladstone go to the zoo and buy me 40,000 snow cones. I ate some Chef Boyardee "Dinosaurs with meatballs." Everyone thinks that they stopped making them, but the truth is that I just bought them all. Then I went over to Jimmy Buffet's house and stole all of the Flintstone's Push-Pops out of his freezer. Then, I took a huge dump on his lawn and farted on his guard dog. I went home and put on my leather pajamas with the rhinestones and the fringes. I looked at myself in the mirror and got a raging boner. Then I watched every episode of The Cosby Show and went to bed. Tomorrow, I'm going to the Video Game Exchange to trade in the Game-Gear that Becky bought me (cause she is lame) for a Nintendo Power Glove.