(no subject)
the truth
Current mood: cold
ok. this ISN'T going to be full of lies. i am going to come out to the world and tell the truth. and i am willing to take the concequences. Dylan didnt rape me. i willingly had sex with him. i only did it because he told me he was going to kill himself. i was stupid. he also told me that he wasnt with jenni those two times. yet another time i was stupid. right there are two lies for sure i know he has told me. 2! but i know he has lied to me WAY more times than twice. now that i am out with that i feel a little better.i know it was really lame/selfish/any other words like those. i also know that i will probably lose any friends that i have because of what i did. i just hope that one day they will forgive me. i know that i have one friend that has known about this that doesnt hate me. she has suported me through all of this mess. she was the one who introduced me to Dylan. yes i am talking about Kami. she has tried her best to help me. i cant tell you how many times i have called her crying my eyes out because of him. but she has listened everytimeand told me that things would get better. and she was right.things are better. i kow i thought that i was happy with him. and for a while i was.truely and honsetly i was. i loved him with all my heart. he helped meget over my shyness. i never thought i was going to get over that. but i have. and i have become more mature because of what happened with him. i just want to thank him for that. and i hope that one day him and i could be friends again. i just wish things wouldnt have ended the way they did. all of the leing and cheating. but i know that all things happen for a reason. i AM doing betternow that i am over him. i know what i did was wrong. but i only did it to save myself. i know i have hurt a lot of people in the process of my big lie and i just want you to know(you know whio you are even though i dont think you have the net but jenni will prolly tell you) that i am truley sorry. i know that sorry doesnt cut it. you have told me many times before. but i am still going to say it cause i am. i am not trying to start anything else either. so please dont take it that way.
maegan- i know that after you read this you will prolly want to kill me or something. and i know that i have prolly lost you forever now. and i can totally understand why. i lied to you. like that BIGGEST lie to ever be told. but i hope you at least understand why i did it. i lied because-well- i didnt want to lose you. but now i realized that i should have just told you up front what really happened. i am a bad friend. you can hate me. cause i know you will. i am prepared for your words of anger. i just couldnt hide this from you any longer.
jenni-you knew that i was lieing all along. but i didnt do this for revenge. you should know me better than that. i wouldnt want someone to do that to me so i wouldnt do that to you. i am sorry. i wish our friendship wouldnt have ended the way it has.
so....i guess i am going to end this now. i am sorry to anyone that i have hurt. i love you all.
♥LOVELOVELOVE♥
JOCELYN
ok
later!!!!
i am at iffy's hizzouse!!
and we have cool pichas!!!
go to her lj its _heartparade
YAY!!!
my rootbeer was alive!!!
Current mood: cold
ok. this ISN'T going to be full of lies. i am going to come out to the world and tell the truth. and i am willing to take the concequences. Dylan didnt rape me. i willingly had sex with him. i only did it because he told me he was going to kill himself. i was stupid. he also told me that he wasnt with jenni those two times. yet another time i was stupid. right there are two lies for sure i know he has told me. 2! but i know he has lied to me WAY more times than twice. now that i am out with that i feel a little better.i know it was really lame/selfish/any other words like those. i also know that i will probably lose any friends that i have because of what i did. i just hope that one day they will forgive me. i know that i have one friend that has known about this that doesnt hate me. she has suported me through all of this mess. she was the one who introduced me to Dylan. yes i am talking about Kami. she has tried her best to help me. i cant tell you how many times i have called her crying my eyes out because of him. but she has listened everytimeand told me that things would get better. and she was right.things are better. i kow i thought that i was happy with him. and for a while i was.truely and honsetly i was. i loved him with all my heart. he helped meget over my shyness. i never thought i was going to get over that. but i have. and i have become more mature because of what happened with him. i just want to thank him for that. and i hope that one day him and i could be friends again. i just wish things wouldnt have ended the way they did. all of the leing and cheating. but i know that all things happen for a reason. i AM doing betternow that i am over him. i know what i did was wrong. but i only did it to save myself. i know i have hurt a lot of people in the process of my big lie and i just want you to know(you know whio you are even though i dont think you have the net but jenni will prolly tell you) that i am truley sorry. i know that sorry doesnt cut it. you have told me many times before. but i am still going to say it cause i am. i am not trying to start anything else either. so please dont take it that way.
maegan- i know that after you read this you will prolly want to kill me or something. and i know that i have prolly lost you forever now. and i can totally understand why. i lied to you. like that BIGGEST lie to ever be told. but i hope you at least understand why i did it. i lied because-well- i didnt want to lose you. but now i realized that i should have just told you up front what really happened. i am a bad friend. you can hate me. cause i know you will. i am prepared for your words of anger. i just couldnt hide this from you any longer.
jenni-you knew that i was lieing all along. but i didnt do this for revenge. you should know me better than that. i wouldnt want someone to do that to me so i wouldnt do that to you. i am sorry. i wish our friendship wouldnt have ended the way it has.
so....i guess i am going to end this now. i am sorry to anyone that i have hurt. i love you all.
♥LOVELOVELOVE♥
JOCELYN
ok
later!!!!
i am at iffy's hizzouse!!
and we have cool pichas!!!
go to her lj its _heartparade
YAY!!!
my rootbeer was alive!!!