oh, true.
All i've heard;
what happened
what's wrong
are you okay
i'm sorry.
it's noone elses fault.
this one was all on me.
so don't feel sorry for me, all i've done is what i know how to do.
and all i know how to do is to not do anything at all.
when faced with a certain situation, i don't know what to do anymore.
i just feel like i'll never be able to tell someone and have them understand.
and when i am put in that situation, like i was just a few days ago, i freak out.
i go crazy.
there's no controlling me. i've lost my mind.
and once it's over.
it's nearly impossible to take it back.
what i need is a fresh start.
but i don't want a completely new beginning.
i want things to be like they were, but i want complete control of the situation.
i have too much trouble talking about it.
talking about anything.
talking to anyone.
i don't want to talk about how i feel, i just want someone to know.
without trying,
to know what's going on.
but noone can.
so i guess that's where this is all my fault.
for keeping it inside all this time.
for not opening up to the people i should talk to.
my perspective
this was really just a mistake
i didnt know things were going to get like this
i thought we were just going to be cool
obviously i care
it's just
i dont.