(no subject)
jeff and i broke up. we agree that we love eachother &that wont be forgotten. stress from work, your friend dieing, distance& pressure, it all made the being in love part of part of us one of the least important things. in one of my last entries i said somthing about how we can make it through anything, i know we could have done a lot of things differently. i've pretty much been a hysterical mess the past 24 hrs. i requested some sort of closure, so we will hopefully meet for a goodbye hug. i will keep it together, walk away from him, probably wail the whole train ride home, then move on with my life- holding on to every good memory.
i am horrible with goodbyes. and closure. and going in diffrent directions. and trying to pretend that the past 9 months didnt happen. they did. and although it took a turn for the worst, it was amazing. we learned a lot about eachother and ourselves. im horrible at being the bigger person. i didnt give up. im not going to pretend i hate him.
we know eachother so well &became best friends, although the relationship fell apart, i hope we still hold onto our friendship more than anything.
i feel like a sponge that was just rung out. reguardless of what people say of how things were meant to be and we are young and it was his fault and there was nothing i coudl do&all the fish in the sea, i feel the same. i wanted that fish. everything i held on to was just ripped from my hands.
....i was planning on deleting this, but there is really no point.
i am horrible with goodbyes. and closure. and going in diffrent directions. and trying to pretend that the past 9 months didnt happen. they did. and although it took a turn for the worst, it was amazing. we learned a lot about eachother and ourselves. im horrible at being the bigger person. i didnt give up. im not going to pretend i hate him.
we know eachother so well &became best friends, although the relationship fell apart, i hope we still hold onto our friendship more than anything.
i feel like a sponge that was just rung out. reguardless of what people say of how things were meant to be and we are young and it was his fault and there was nothing i coudl do&all the fish in the sea, i feel the same. i wanted that fish. everything i held on to was just ripped from my hands.
....i was planning on deleting this, but there is really no point.