what a way to start.
wow. this probably isnt a great way to start a live journal (especially because i was SO excited to get one.. even if its recycled...)
but god... its a friday and im not doing anything exciting. why? because im not in a great mood. the worst part about it is i dont know why... and i dont know how to fix it. maybe bitching at my computer will work? so far... no. maybe ill take a trip to west coast and pick up a movie or 2... and just spend some time with myself. i dont do that enough
so anyway... why does it seem like everyone else is always happy? i feel like im the only one whos really unhappy with themself...but i know its not really that way. its like everyone has this outer shell that makes them look so much happier than they really are or something. cuz u see someone at school and you think they look so happy. so perfect. so content. but then you talk to them later, or read their live journal or something, and you see their perspective. theyre just as depressed as anyone else. its really remarkable. how depressing life can really be.
i dont even know what im saying anymore. I DONT EVEN GET MYSELF RIGHT NOW. i mean... i had SUCH a good day! a days are the best... my afternoons are all specials. and field hockey? we did a campus run... in which i was in the top 5! and then we just scrimmaged the whole time.
i think its DEFINITLY my family. my mom keeps yelling at me to do shit, i feel like all ive done since i got home is just slave for her. and then my dad comes home and asks me when my next game is, jst like every night... as if hes going to come? the seasons almost over and they havent been to a single game. and ALL they do is yell at me. then every once in a while they act really nice and i just run with it... but it ends up crushing me later when they act lik their old asshole selves. does this make any sense? god i DONT think it does. whatever.
I WANT TO GO GET SOME MOVIES BUT MY PARENTS ARE BEING SUCH ASSHOLES! UGH!!!
but god... its a friday and im not doing anything exciting. why? because im not in a great mood. the worst part about it is i dont know why... and i dont know how to fix it. maybe bitching at my computer will work? so far... no. maybe ill take a trip to west coast and pick up a movie or 2... and just spend some time with myself. i dont do that enough
so anyway... why does it seem like everyone else is always happy? i feel like im the only one whos really unhappy with themself...but i know its not really that way. its like everyone has this outer shell that makes them look so much happier than they really are or something. cuz u see someone at school and you think they look so happy. so perfect. so content. but then you talk to them later, or read their live journal or something, and you see their perspective. theyre just as depressed as anyone else. its really remarkable. how depressing life can really be.
i dont even know what im saying anymore. I DONT EVEN GET MYSELF RIGHT NOW. i mean... i had SUCH a good day! a days are the best... my afternoons are all specials. and field hockey? we did a campus run... in which i was in the top 5! and then we just scrimmaged the whole time.
i think its DEFINITLY my family. my mom keeps yelling at me to do shit, i feel like all ive done since i got home is just slave for her. and then my dad comes home and asks me when my next game is, jst like every night... as if hes going to come? the seasons almost over and they havent been to a single game. and ALL they do is yell at me. then every once in a while they act really nice and i just run with it... but it ends up crushing me later when they act lik their old asshole selves. does this make any sense? god i DONT think it does. whatever.
I WANT TO GO GET SOME MOVIES BUT MY PARENTS ARE BEING SUCH ASSHOLES! UGH!!!