oh goodness
if only some of this made sense...its like i complain too much and i feel like it bothers everybody all the time so i stop...and not i get this feeling like im shutting everybody out like its some sort of really bad thing...i think i need to stop...things alwas look up for ppl...why should be any different. maybe i just need to stop thinking about all the bad thngs and focus on the good things like....um...like...well okay i cant think of anything right now but im sure something will come to mind soon. in the mean tme i cant stop eating dammit...i never say no to food. how did i let myself go like this? i really lack self control...thats just horrible...i dunno why i cant say no..okay well no more complaining...lets just wait wait wait wait for something good to happen...ill keep myself posted!