(no subject)

[_huffy_]

im so depressed right now...i sang mr blue sky..but not in my cheery way...i miss past days...i miss my 10th grade year...i didnt have a single care in the world...everything was good...now i know love, now i know true pain, i know being alone, i know being neglected, i know wanting to die...i look at my freshman year, i was so inocent...even the drinking though...life was so easy and simple...now...things are so much more difficult...i know a lot more though, im much wiser than i was, but, i think i would trade it all in for the ignorance of the past...im tired of feeling empty...im tired of feeling lost...im tired of being overlooked, uncared for, and hated...im tired of life...i just want to be happy...there are certain times that im so happy i cry...but sadly, those times are very short, and dont last forever...once there done, i have to drive home, through san ann, dade city, my unhappiness, and finally, home...things for me are going down..i want to run away, run away from my problems, my sadness, my life...some of you may think this is a cry for help, or me over-exagerating my problems...but problems are relative...im not a strong person...so mine seem big...but im not writing this for you to judge me or anything...im simply stating how i feel...maybe to explain a few things...oh well, i will probably goto bed soon, bye
alex

"no colors anymore i want them to turn black"