Nuts are fun
***No***
It wasn't all that bad. Some of the people you really liked. There was this girl ... her nickname was Tesa. Tesa was probably the most depressed one of the crowd. One day her doc told her that the next day she would have to go to another institution. We had all heard of it. It was for the 'hopeless cases'.
Five minutes later he returned to her room and told her to get her things packed. The ambulance was already on the way.
You hated him for that, didn't you?
He didn't see Tesa for who she was: A girl who even comforted others when she was down herself, a creative mastermind, a wonderful person.
You couldn't sleep very well and they gave you a pill. You took it at 5:45 PM. At 6 PM you were already asleep. When you woke up the next day you felt like killing yourself and you knew it was no natural feeling. Of course you had thought of this earlier, but you were better now. It wasn't anything you really wanted to do. The drugs had fucked up your mind and you refused to take them anymore.
But things went ... not quite as you thought they would.
You had a friend there, named Ulli. She was friends with Klaus, Christopher and Nicole; the oldies of the institution. One night they went clubbing and obviously Ulli got a little drunk and molested the others a bit. She didn't mean to really and everyone thought it was quite funny. Then they were all rather mean to her and you were in an awful situation because you were friends with all of them.
When they noticed that you rather sided with Ulli and you were not quite as you appeared ... they turned their backs on you. You were rather alone in a place where people should have understood.
Then the art therapy lesson came ...
We were supposed to draw a picture together we all would like enough to have it on our living room wall. I drew first. A circle and seven spots to represent our group. I chose pink. I like pink. The others didn't. Klaus drew an orange ... thing that was supposed to sooth the pink spots, to not make them feel alone. I tried to save the picture and chose blue (which compliments orange) to welcome the orange. They thought it was to shut out everything.
Then Jule came. She was the 'star' of the group. Blonde, baby face, supposed to be pretty. She drew some weird, abstract things in colours the others liked and everyone cheered. I'll never forget her smug face and swaying hips. She knew she hurt me and she enjoyed it.
I prayed to God. I often prayed to Him ... to anyone really.
When the session was over I ran out and downstairs to the cellar. I was crying. I couldn't hold it back.
Then you were sick. They called you a taxi to go to another hospital. No one of your group came along to comfort you.
Time moved on. Philipp visited you to bring you your books he still had. He was arrogant. He ate all of the cheese we had and the other patients kinda disliked him for that.
He said he couldn't deal with depressed people. That he had a girlfriend. That was in March. Way later, in October, I learned that he had broken up with his girlfriend in Ferbruary.
Then your last night came. People had abused Ulli again mentally and we were both rather sad, but then her group did something ... incredibly nice for us. They made a late dinner for us and a guy played the guitar. They sang 'Goodbye lady' for us.
I got a lot of presents. I was loved, I think. In some way I was loved.
I never looked back, though, and I'm not in touch with any of them anymore. It just wasn't meant to be, I guess. But from that point my life changed.
Gelb, however, firmly remained where he was: At my side.
~~~Who is Gelb?~~~
It wasn't all that bad. Some of the people you really liked. There was this girl ... her nickname was Tesa. Tesa was probably the most depressed one of the crowd. One day her doc told her that the next day she would have to go to another institution. We had all heard of it. It was for the 'hopeless cases'.
Five minutes later he returned to her room and told her to get her things packed. The ambulance was already on the way.
You hated him for that, didn't you?
He didn't see Tesa for who she was: A girl who even comforted others when she was down herself, a creative mastermind, a wonderful person.
You couldn't sleep very well and they gave you a pill. You took it at 5:45 PM. At 6 PM you were already asleep. When you woke up the next day you felt like killing yourself and you knew it was no natural feeling. Of course you had thought of this earlier, but you were better now. It wasn't anything you really wanted to do. The drugs had fucked up your mind and you refused to take them anymore.
But things went ... not quite as you thought they would.
You had a friend there, named Ulli. She was friends with Klaus, Christopher and Nicole; the oldies of the institution. One night they went clubbing and obviously Ulli got a little drunk and molested the others a bit. She didn't mean to really and everyone thought it was quite funny. Then they were all rather mean to her and you were in an awful situation because you were friends with all of them.
When they noticed that you rather sided with Ulli and you were not quite as you appeared ... they turned their backs on you. You were rather alone in a place where people should have understood.
Then the art therapy lesson came ...
We were supposed to draw a picture together we all would like enough to have it on our living room wall. I drew first. A circle and seven spots to represent our group. I chose pink. I like pink. The others didn't. Klaus drew an orange ... thing that was supposed to sooth the pink spots, to not make them feel alone. I tried to save the picture and chose blue (which compliments orange) to welcome the orange. They thought it was to shut out everything.
Then Jule came. She was the 'star' of the group. Blonde, baby face, supposed to be pretty. She drew some weird, abstract things in colours the others liked and everyone cheered. I'll never forget her smug face and swaying hips. She knew she hurt me and she enjoyed it.
I prayed to God. I often prayed to Him ... to anyone really.
When the session was over I ran out and downstairs to the cellar. I was crying. I couldn't hold it back.
Then you were sick. They called you a taxi to go to another hospital. No one of your group came along to comfort you.
Time moved on. Philipp visited you to bring you your books he still had. He was arrogant. He ate all of the cheese we had and the other patients kinda disliked him for that.
He said he couldn't deal with depressed people. That he had a girlfriend. That was in March. Way later, in October, I learned that he had broken up with his girlfriend in Ferbruary.
Then your last night came. People had abused Ulli again mentally and we were both rather sad, but then her group did something ... incredibly nice for us. They made a late dinner for us and a guy played the guitar. They sang 'Goodbye lady' for us.
I got a lot of presents. I was loved, I think. In some way I was loved.
I never looked back, though, and I'm not in touch with any of them anymore. It just wasn't meant to be, I guess. But from that point my life changed.
Gelb, however, firmly remained where he was: At my side.
~~~Who is Gelb?~~~