037;
This year has been absolutely, positvely crazy. I can't believe it's over, but in the same sense I am so glad that it is. So many things happened this year that changed me as a person. My depression has given me the ride of my life. I almost regret ever taking it to the level of seeing a doctor. I believe that seeing the doctor fucked me up even more than I already was.
After writing perscription after perscription, my doctor finally settled on Cymbalta, a time release "depression" pill. After doing some research, I concluded that Cymbalta had a "black-box" warning on it, meaning people have died from it. Cymbalta also targets your neurotrasmitters in your brain- which means it doesn't really do anything for depression. I decided to get off this medicine [in fear of dying, of course, as well as the fact I felt like a nutcase being written so many different perscriptions that didn't even affect me] but whenever I stopped taking it, I would go through an outrageous withdrawl- headaches, tingly-ness in my head, numbness in my arms and hands. After calling my docotor six times, my mom hasn't even gotten a response from the doctor herself- just a secretary. And here I am now, still trying to quit this medicine.
Jeff and I have went through a lot as well, but it has also led us to grow stronger every day. Although we still have ups and downs, we are learning from our daily experiences and each day shows us how much we really mean to each other. I've learned so much from my relationship with Jeff. I've learned what the meaning of true love is. I've learned how to deal with my emotions- even though I am still overly sensitive. I am attached, and I have found my one and only true love. I am for sure excited to end school and begin my life with him.
My parents are another story. I have begun to spend more and more time away from home, and I really think that mothers them. They don't want to let go of me- and they think by keeping me in with an earlier curfew than all my friends will have some effect. It won't. I am still out with my friends nearly every day, and I can't wait until the day that they will let me go.
All in all, I have gorwn up. I am at least happy I am still alive. I'm ready for summer, and I sure am ready to be in my last year of high school. I can't wait to begin my life.
After writing perscription after perscription, my doctor finally settled on Cymbalta, a time release "depression" pill. After doing some research, I concluded that Cymbalta had a "black-box" warning on it, meaning people have died from it. Cymbalta also targets your neurotrasmitters in your brain- which means it doesn't really do anything for depression. I decided to get off this medicine [in fear of dying, of course, as well as the fact I felt like a nutcase being written so many different perscriptions that didn't even affect me] but whenever I stopped taking it, I would go through an outrageous withdrawl- headaches, tingly-ness in my head, numbness in my arms and hands. After calling my docotor six times, my mom hasn't even gotten a response from the doctor herself- just a secretary. And here I am now, still trying to quit this medicine.
Jeff and I have went through a lot as well, but it has also led us to grow stronger every day. Although we still have ups and downs, we are learning from our daily experiences and each day shows us how much we really mean to each other. I've learned so much from my relationship with Jeff. I've learned what the meaning of true love is. I've learned how to deal with my emotions- even though I am still overly sensitive. I am attached, and I have found my one and only true love. I am for sure excited to end school and begin my life with him.
My parents are another story. I have begun to spend more and more time away from home, and I really think that mothers them. They don't want to let go of me- and they think by keeping me in with an earlier curfew than all my friends will have some effect. It won't. I am still out with my friends nearly every day, and I can't wait until the day that they will let me go.
All in all, I have gorwn up. I am at least happy I am still alive. I'm ready for summer, and I sure am ready to be in my last year of high school. I can't wait to begin my life.