The cat says mew
Difficult it is to type a journal entry with a tuxedo cat perched precariously on your back.
I was being introspective the other day and I came up with a lot of interesting thoughts about myself and how I am who I am and why, but alas I was in the car with no way to get my thoughts out onto any permanent media, so here is the watered down version of my thoughts.
I talk a big game about not caring about anyone, besides the obvious people in my life who mean something, and for the most part it is true. I find it difficult to have compassion for others when I feel that they have somehow brought their misfortune onto themselves, and I do feel this is true for a lot of people. However, I feel great empathy at times that is almost crushing in its intensity. Commercials make me cry. Not just on my period. There are certain commercials involving animals and the dreaded elderly that just completely devastate me for a matter of minutes until I can collect myself. The thing that gets me is that is mostly faked. The old woman in the Hallmark commercial is not really trudging to her mailbox everyday hoping to find something that reminds her that someone still knows she is alive only to find it empty. She is an actress who is lucky enough to have found work in her old age. I guess it's knowing that there really are people like that that makes me so upset.
I guess I just have trouble reconciling the difference between my reaction to most people and my reaction to stuff like that. It's just weird.
Anyway, I was going to type more, but it is getting late and I want to watch Family Guy. I won't really be able to sleep well until Chibi gets back from his concert in VA anyway, so I might as well try to amuse myself til 1 or 2am.
Ciao!
I was being introspective the other day and I came up with a lot of interesting thoughts about myself and how I am who I am and why, but alas I was in the car with no way to get my thoughts out onto any permanent media, so here is the watered down version of my thoughts.
I talk a big game about not caring about anyone, besides the obvious people in my life who mean something, and for the most part it is true. I find it difficult to have compassion for others when I feel that they have somehow brought their misfortune onto themselves, and I do feel this is true for a lot of people. However, I feel great empathy at times that is almost crushing in its intensity. Commercials make me cry. Not just on my period. There are certain commercials involving animals and the dreaded elderly that just completely devastate me for a matter of minutes until I can collect myself. The thing that gets me is that is mostly faked. The old woman in the Hallmark commercial is not really trudging to her mailbox everyday hoping to find something that reminds her that someone still knows she is alive only to find it empty. She is an actress who is lucky enough to have found work in her old age. I guess it's knowing that there really are people like that that makes me so upset.
I guess I just have trouble reconciling the difference between my reaction to most people and my reaction to stuff like that. It's just weird.
Anyway, I was going to type more, but it is getting late and I want to watch Family Guy. I won't really be able to sleep well until Chibi gets back from his concert in VA anyway, so I might as well try to amuse myself til 1 or 2am.
Ciao!