[dear] . [mr.] . [ceo]
to my dear ceo:
so, this morning, mr. ceo, you pull me into your office and ask of me the following:
"we need to get the company website up in 2 days...here's all the information you need.
just get it up and running..."
[you hand me a copy of an e-mail i sent to you on 5/10/04 with your chicken scratch all over it.]
now, this website thing i've been pushing for years...
i came up with plans, flow-charts, priority lists, questions for content of the website...
everything...
and you shut me down...said that it wasn't important.
in fact, you shut me down more than once...
...and let's not forget the time you dragged me into the office to build an entire website on the fly because you put the company's website address in a huge article in fashion manuscript without having an actual website.
...and you never gave me extra compensation for it.
well, mr. fancy pants...looks like your in-house website designer is leaving...
so, whatcha gonna do?
you're gonna ask me to put up the website in 2 days.
you stupid asshole.
so, i wrote you a formal e-mail stating that it could not be done.
that you should go to guru.com and hire a professional website designer to do the job.
that i was too busy tying up loose ends.
ha . ha . ha
in other news, mr. dickface, you stopped me from going to go see a customer...
to transition the new sales person in and say my goodbyes.
you said you would go in my place...
you stole my thunder when they complimented you on the organization of the developments [done by me]...
and you never mentioned me at all.
you're a dick.
i hope you catch on fire.
in short, mr. hair-plugs, where once i was iffy about leaving your crap company...
now i am completely and utterly sure that i want to leave...
because i refuse to make money that will, ultimately, be shoved into your greasy pockets.
you're a scum bag.
you'll be hearing from me again...
but when that happens, you better believe i'll be on top of my game...
and you're gonna be a washed-up nobody that burned all his bridges for money...
with a bad hair-plug job to boot.
warmest regards,
nami
global product developer
your mortal enemy
global account manager
graphic designer
sales representative
again, your mortal enemy