All good things
When a 3 day weekend accomplishes nothing more than overdosing on coffee and episodes of ER then you know it's the end of something. Something that was likely to end at the end of my time here in Japan anyway, but in the interest of honesty we spared ourselves many more months of...? I'm not even sure what exactly but it's been felt for a long time and while it hurts now, knowing is better than not knowing. (i.e. Blow into this paper bag go home and stop grinning at everyone.)
It's been a good year though, mostly. Regrets? Perhaps I'm kidding myself but I don't seem to have any. None that I could have done anything about anyway. More useful to regret the moon, or marmite...
I learned that I'm not an emotional retard. In fact, throwing out 10 odd years of straight-faced, stone heartedness, (basically flying in the face of natural law as I knew it) I turned out to be extremely emotional and sensitive. From small animals that ran away from me to running dangerously low on coffee, I wept for the inane, the furry and even occasionally (as now) with legitimate reason. I guess I found my heart. And found that it's a bleeder unable to discriminate between the mundane and the important. Bloody annoying that.
Anyway, there's still him and there's still me. We probably understand the other one better than anyone else here in Japan and being the asocial berks that we are, I don't think we can be bothered to start from scratch with new people. Friends, neighbors, fellow hermits. That's all we are now. That's our life, small and complicated as it is.
End Chapter 1
It's been a good year though, mostly. Regrets? Perhaps I'm kidding myself but I don't seem to have any. None that I could have done anything about anyway. More useful to regret the moon, or marmite...
I learned that I'm not an emotional retard. In fact, throwing out 10 odd years of straight-faced, stone heartedness, (basically flying in the face of natural law as I knew it) I turned out to be extremely emotional and sensitive. From small animals that ran away from me to running dangerously low on coffee, I wept for the inane, the furry and even occasionally (as now) with legitimate reason. I guess I found my heart. And found that it's a bleeder unable to discriminate between the mundane and the important. Bloody annoying that.
Anyway, there's still him and there's still me. We probably understand the other one better than anyone else here in Japan and being the asocial berks that we are, I don't think we can be bothered to start from scratch with new people. Friends, neighbors, fellow hermits. That's all we are now. That's our life, small and complicated as it is.
End Chapter 1
