(no subject)
I read. Then I thought. Then I imagined. Then I planned.
I don't know what I would like out of life, at all. I don't think it is just one thing, but it is not many things. I do know what I don't want. Which seems kind of defeating if you think about that in terms of "why should I define existence by the things I do not like?" I don't want to live with people who worry about things like money, making friends, going to college, or buying Hummers. I don't want to live with people who are terrible to each other for no reason. I don't want to live where a book written by people two-thousand years ago is essentially law. I don't want to be friends with people who do things only because other people make them feel inclined to do so. I don't want to see the same commercials and t.v. shows anymore. I don't want to do the things I write about not needing anymore. I don't feel like I fit in very much. Not in a sad way for sympathy, but more so in a self-realization kind of way. It might not even be a negative thing.
The older I get, which is not very old yet, the more I think of the future and how less and less of it is there. Why should there be only a handful of ways to waste the little time you have? Why is it wrong to not agree with them?
The only thing left to do, is to do and be. No wishes. No goals. Just being and doing.
"I couldn't resist stealing up to the edge of doom and peering over the brink. The hint of what was concealed in those shadows terrified me but I caught sight of something in the glimpse, some forbidden and elemental riddle that was no less compelling than the sweet, hidden petals of a woman's sex."
I don't know what I would like out of life, at all. I don't think it is just one thing, but it is not many things. I do know what I don't want. Which seems kind of defeating if you think about that in terms of "why should I define existence by the things I do not like?" I don't want to live with people who worry about things like money, making friends, going to college, or buying Hummers. I don't want to live with people who are terrible to each other for no reason. I don't want to live where a book written by people two-thousand years ago is essentially law. I don't want to be friends with people who do things only because other people make them feel inclined to do so. I don't want to see the same commercials and t.v. shows anymore. I don't want to do the things I write about not needing anymore. I don't feel like I fit in very much. Not in a sad way for sympathy, but more so in a self-realization kind of way. It might not even be a negative thing.
The older I get, which is not very old yet, the more I think of the future and how less and less of it is there. Why should there be only a handful of ways to waste the little time you have? Why is it wrong to not agree with them?
The only thing left to do, is to do and be. No wishes. No goals. Just being and doing.
"I couldn't resist stealing up to the edge of doom and peering over the brink. The hint of what was concealed in those shadows terrified me but I caught sight of something in the glimpse, some forbidden and elemental riddle that was no less compelling than the sweet, hidden petals of a woman's sex."