(no subject)
So I've posted many of entries about this. Everyone is probably as confused about the whole situation as I am, so I shall explain.
I have been seeing this wonderful boy named Daniel. He makes me laugh, and dinner. He's strong and warm and very caring towards me. He's easy to talk to, and easy on the eyes. And he wrote a beautiful song just for my own.
Well, he left in september to move to portland oregon. And that just crushed me entirely. And at that point in time I was in between my jobs. And all this shit just fell in my lap.
He came home about a month later, and I can always recall that day perfectly, finding him on my front porch. Just as he had never left before. He has been staying with me since he's been back. All his stuff is here, we grocery shop, watch movies and fall asleep on the couch together.
But alas, this kind of wonderful thing cannot last forever. For I have always known it wouldn't. ANd it won't
For he plans no matter what to move back to Lousiana. I know I cannot find a way to keep him here. SO I guess it's just a matter of time before he is gone out of my life, and my little feelings will be crushed all over again.
His question of leaving has been a up in the air topic for the past few weeks, and I thought it wouldn't happen because he found a job here. But now it seems he is more determined to leave.
I have been trying to build myself up to not feel so deeply for him but it's way too hard. I've been trying to turn my emotions off because I know he would just leave again, but then again that has proven itself to be just as hard.
This is what I have for now.