(no subject)
Today I walked 50 sweet Omaha city blocks to get to the hot shops. They were only a destination. I’m afraid I’ve started walking again. No, its more like large-scale pacing. It’s mindless, its really just a rhythm.
At the end of Davenport I came upon a steep embankment that jutted out like a wall on either side of the highway. So I lay down in the grass and watched the cars speeding by. It felt like a rush and it sounded like the ocean.
But the rush faded and so I kept walking. I passed this man. He was standing in the middle of an empty parking lot on the outskirts of town, and we was waving his hands at me, like he knew me or something. I thought he seemed nice. He was wearing a red hat.
I got to the hot shops but after all that wild prairie wind and the grungy throb of the lower city’s heartbeat and after being there in the sweet thick of it, watching drug deals go down and lives get wrecked, I felt a disconnect the moment I walked in the door. It was tame. It was everything that I hate about art. All the people there were old and dry.
So I wandered around for a whole and thought about stealing a bottle of bailey’s, but I thought twice. Save the drunk for the old, dry people.
When I got back outside, the man in the red hat was standing at the edge of the parking lot next to a field. The field was on fire, smoke rising up in quiet sheets. He tried to catch my attention, to tell me something, but up close I could see that he had crazy eyes. I think that he lit that field on fire. It was pretty cool. I probably would have walked right into those flames if his crazy eyes weren’t so transfixed on me. That’s how cool it looked.
Jerry is at work, Jamie is at a wedding. Paul is touring. Jason is in Santa Fe for his mom’s birthday. Danielle is thirty five or something.
This city is still so new
These people are still such strangers
Emma Is a bitch
Fuck her
And fuck matt too.
From now on I’m only hanging out with people who are good to me and if that means spending all my time alone, then so be it.
Fuck them.
I will not be made a fool.
The power pad is cool. They give out free beer to outgoing girls, and the more free beer I got, the more outgoing I became. To clarify, I got really drunk last night.
Now there’s all that bile on the grass where I knelt. I’m afraid I’ve killed the grass. It will turn brown and it won’t grow back until next spring. Ok, so today I helped winter along.
I know this city is full of people who turn left off of dodge. I want to find them. I want to surround myself with them. Instead, I have wasted this week among the people who are bored, and the people who are tired, and the people who invent ailments to get out of obligations. I want people who burn with creativity. I want someone who can’t sleep at night for fear that a second will go by untouched.
At the end of Davenport I came upon a steep embankment that jutted out like a wall on either side of the highway. So I lay down in the grass and watched the cars speeding by. It felt like a rush and it sounded like the ocean.
But the rush faded and so I kept walking. I passed this man. He was standing in the middle of an empty parking lot on the outskirts of town, and we was waving his hands at me, like he knew me or something. I thought he seemed nice. He was wearing a red hat.
I got to the hot shops but after all that wild prairie wind and the grungy throb of the lower city’s heartbeat and after being there in the sweet thick of it, watching drug deals go down and lives get wrecked, I felt a disconnect the moment I walked in the door. It was tame. It was everything that I hate about art. All the people there were old and dry.
So I wandered around for a whole and thought about stealing a bottle of bailey’s, but I thought twice. Save the drunk for the old, dry people.
When I got back outside, the man in the red hat was standing at the edge of the parking lot next to a field. The field was on fire, smoke rising up in quiet sheets. He tried to catch my attention, to tell me something, but up close I could see that he had crazy eyes. I think that he lit that field on fire. It was pretty cool. I probably would have walked right into those flames if his crazy eyes weren’t so transfixed on me. That’s how cool it looked.
Jerry is at work, Jamie is at a wedding. Paul is touring. Jason is in Santa Fe for his mom’s birthday. Danielle is thirty five or something.
This city is still so new
These people are still such strangers
Emma Is a bitch
Fuck her
And fuck matt too.
From now on I’m only hanging out with people who are good to me and if that means spending all my time alone, then so be it.
Fuck them.
I will not be made a fool.
The power pad is cool. They give out free beer to outgoing girls, and the more free beer I got, the more outgoing I became. To clarify, I got really drunk last night.
Now there’s all that bile on the grass where I knelt. I’m afraid I’ve killed the grass. It will turn brown and it won’t grow back until next spring. Ok, so today I helped winter along.
I know this city is full of people who turn left off of dodge. I want to find them. I want to surround myself with them. Instead, I have wasted this week among the people who are bored, and the people who are tired, and the people who invent ailments to get out of obligations. I want people who burn with creativity. I want someone who can’t sleep at night for fear that a second will go by untouched.