well eellooooo
yup yup, so I'm sittin here doing alittle drinkin and smokin alittle of ye ol herb. Good stuff to calm the nerves and limit the emotions.
So I watched the second half of "sex in the city" and also a few episodes of the second season. Well, I gotta say I'm pretty impressed. I think my last judgment was alittle harsh. I believe I actually shed a couple tears or three at the end of the first season...sshh!! ;0) Aaaww, real love does still exist. That made me really happy to see that at least one of the girls outa the 4 fall in love. Its something that does really happen and it does exist. Most people just never take the time to find it or let it find them. I think more people just push it away because their afraid of getting hurt.
Love is definitly the most interesting emtion that humans have. I think its the least known about and least understood but the most influential and the most strongly felt emotion. Well, I have to admit I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic myself. Whats even funnier is the character in the show thats the "sensative / hopeless romantic" guy thats also a web designer...HAAAA.... yea, what the fuck.
So the show really opens my mind to what the really real world is like.... in a way. I've lived in some sheltered little good life where you marry the one you loose your virginity to. Well, as more time goes on I'm realizing I'm a dieing breed. I was homeschool most my school life and then went to private school for most the rest. Lived in a world where sex was bad and your desires were never to be thought about much less lived out. As I get older life just seems to become a big canvas for expression. The things I feel the things I see and experience are all subject to expression. So many things are considered taboo and your not supposed to talk about them or act upon them. I think thats why alot of my paintings lately have had alot of violence as their focus. Violence is something thats considered taboo BUT you see it everyday on your local news. Its right in your face on the front page of the newspaper. Our fucking 9 year olds can just turn on CNN and watch someone get their fucking head cut off, I mean seriously. WTF is happening to the world we live in. So this is what I see and this is what I paint, the things I see and the things that effect. me.
Recently a whole new world to my life has been opened. Some people can relate to me and others cannot. sex. Its a very weird and powerful thing and for the most part, most people have forgotten or have pushed back its emotional power that it can hold. I have not however. I started having sex much later in life than most so its something that is .... much newer to me. People younger than me by only 5 years are growing up in a world that didnt exist when I was their age. very strange. I dont understand. I try to relate. Instead I just learn.
We will see what becomes of the images and images in my head. Now not only violence and things I see.... but things I feel. More personal things than before. I feel as though I'm coming to a new place in my creativity. As if I didnt have enough thoughts and ideas in the first place. Now I have more.
Now its just a matter of having the extra money for paint materials, thats the real stopper for me. I would paint alot more often if I had the supplies. It would be nice to find a sponsor but I dont think they exist for fine artists.. but we'll see.
Well, its time for me to be off and have alittle fun with my wonderful and amazing girlfriend. Back to ultra violence ... the wonderful clockwork orange.
good nite journal.
So I watched the second half of "sex in the city" and also a few episodes of the second season. Well, I gotta say I'm pretty impressed. I think my last judgment was alittle harsh. I believe I actually shed a couple tears or three at the end of the first season...sshh!! ;0) Aaaww, real love does still exist. That made me really happy to see that at least one of the girls outa the 4 fall in love. Its something that does really happen and it does exist. Most people just never take the time to find it or let it find them. I think more people just push it away because their afraid of getting hurt.
Love is definitly the most interesting emtion that humans have. I think its the least known about and least understood but the most influential and the most strongly felt emotion. Well, I have to admit I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic myself. Whats even funnier is the character in the show thats the "sensative / hopeless romantic" guy thats also a web designer...HAAAA.... yea, what the fuck.
So the show really opens my mind to what the really real world is like.... in a way. I've lived in some sheltered little good life where you marry the one you loose your virginity to. Well, as more time goes on I'm realizing I'm a dieing breed. I was homeschool most my school life and then went to private school for most the rest. Lived in a world where sex was bad and your desires were never to be thought about much less lived out. As I get older life just seems to become a big canvas for expression. The things I feel the things I see and experience are all subject to expression. So many things are considered taboo and your not supposed to talk about them or act upon them. I think thats why alot of my paintings lately have had alot of violence as their focus. Violence is something thats considered taboo BUT you see it everyday on your local news. Its right in your face on the front page of the newspaper. Our fucking 9 year olds can just turn on CNN and watch someone get their fucking head cut off, I mean seriously. WTF is happening to the world we live in. So this is what I see and this is what I paint, the things I see and the things that effect. me.
Recently a whole new world to my life has been opened. Some people can relate to me and others cannot. sex. Its a very weird and powerful thing and for the most part, most people have forgotten or have pushed back its emotional power that it can hold. I have not however. I started having sex much later in life than most so its something that is .... much newer to me. People younger than me by only 5 years are growing up in a world that didnt exist when I was their age. very strange. I dont understand. I try to relate. Instead I just learn.
We will see what becomes of the images and images in my head. Now not only violence and things I see.... but things I feel. More personal things than before. I feel as though I'm coming to a new place in my creativity. As if I didnt have enough thoughts and ideas in the first place. Now I have more.
Now its just a matter of having the extra money for paint materials, thats the real stopper for me. I would paint alot more often if I had the supplies. It would be nice to find a sponsor but I dont think they exist for fine artists.. but we'll see.
Well, its time for me to be off and have alittle fun with my wonderful and amazing girlfriend. Back to ultra violence ... the wonderful clockwork orange.
good nite journal.