(no subject)
ya wanna hear something kinda interesting/depressing?
No married couple that we've met here in Charleston is happy.
I mean, no way I'm happy 24/7 either. But these people seriously seem to hate each other most of the time. To the point of being violent and so so hurtful. Why even stay in a relationship like that? Is it possible to love and loathe someone simultaneously?
I think that because I usually only post here when I get upset, it may portray my life as worse than it usually is. Truth be known I'm happy more often than I'm sad. And I love Michael, and he loves me, etc. etc.
I don't think I've ever really tried to express my reasons for getting married so young. I know that nobody really expected it and most probably don't understand or have some misconceptions about me because of it. I don't talk about it much, because I don't feel that I should have to explain myself. I guess this is all the explaination the world is gonna get.
So here it goes: I met Michael about halfway through my senior year. It went fast, but that was what I wanted at the time. I wish I'd done some things different, but as time travel it still theoretical I have to just live with that. Here's the important part- he wasn't my first, but I had the choice to make him my last. With him I was able to be myself and let him know everything about me (and I have some secrets, the deep dark type, that only he knows). He makes me smile even when I don't want to and puts up with a lot of the worse parts of my personality. Sure I could've went to college and gone to parties and met more boys and yaddy ya. Would I have met someone who was "better" for me? Someone who fits the idea of what I thought I wanted more than Michael does? Maybe. But my Dad waited till his thirtys to get married, and it didn't assure happiness for him. I could've went on living the way I was, and gave away little pieces of my heart to other guys all over the world. Or I could give all that I had left to Michael.
I don't know much about "soulmates"; "true love" may just be for the movies. Michael isn't perfect. There are things I wish I could change about him. And of course I'm nowhere close to perfect either. But we both wake up every day and decide we want to make this work. And it's hard. But I have a permanent best friend that, believe it or not, I still love to be with. We still have fun and laugh. And when the time to laugh is over I know he'll still be there, in case it's time to cry.
No married couple that we've met here in Charleston is happy.
I mean, no way I'm happy 24/7 either. But these people seriously seem to hate each other most of the time. To the point of being violent and so so hurtful. Why even stay in a relationship like that? Is it possible to love and loathe someone simultaneously?
I think that because I usually only post here when I get upset, it may portray my life as worse than it usually is. Truth be known I'm happy more often than I'm sad. And I love Michael, and he loves me, etc. etc.
I don't think I've ever really tried to express my reasons for getting married so young. I know that nobody really expected it and most probably don't understand or have some misconceptions about me because of it. I don't talk about it much, because I don't feel that I should have to explain myself. I guess this is all the explaination the world is gonna get.
So here it goes: I met Michael about halfway through my senior year. It went fast, but that was what I wanted at the time. I wish I'd done some things different, but as time travel it still theoretical I have to just live with that. Here's the important part- he wasn't my first, but I had the choice to make him my last. With him I was able to be myself and let him know everything about me (and I have some secrets, the deep dark type, that only he knows). He makes me smile even when I don't want to and puts up with a lot of the worse parts of my personality. Sure I could've went to college and gone to parties and met more boys and yaddy ya. Would I have met someone who was "better" for me? Someone who fits the idea of what I thought I wanted more than Michael does? Maybe. But my Dad waited till his thirtys to get married, and it didn't assure happiness for him. I could've went on living the way I was, and gave away little pieces of my heart to other guys all over the world. Or I could give all that I had left to Michael.
I don't know much about "soulmates"; "true love" may just be for the movies. Michael isn't perfect. There are things I wish I could change about him. And of course I'm nowhere close to perfect either. But we both wake up every day and decide we want to make this work. And it's hard. But I have a permanent best friend that, believe it or not, I still love to be with. We still have fun and laugh. And when the time to laugh is over I know he'll still be there, in case it's time to cry.