it was perfect. why can't it be real life...
last night I dreamed that I got married. it was at some gigantic castle/cathedral, which managed to look like the old movie set of Hogwarts in that it had a whole bunch of interwoven staircases looping all over the back and over the top of the main nave/sanctuary area. I was in an enormous 80s concoction of lace, ribbons, bows, and poufs, except it actually managed to be very pretty, and I liked it. I like it even now, remembering. outside there were large fields of rolling green grass, and every place in the dream is suffused with streaming sunlight.
I was mostly excited and a little nervous, skittering here and there trying to get to the staircase I'd descend to walk down the aisle. then I found out that the photographer was plotting to have the groom and I run into each other before the wedding actually started so she could get "those awesome pictures". now irl I do NOT appreciate photographers who steamroll over their clients' wishes to keep the bride and groom separated until she walks down the aisle. I did in the dream too, and I made sure everyone knew, everywhere I went. I was trying to find the photographer so I could fire her ass and get someone else to do it, and also trying to keep out of the groom's sight, so I was listening to everyone shouting out that I should duck right or turn left or climb these stairs and whatnot. it also reminded me a bit of the staircase scene at the end of Labyrinth, but nothing was upside-down or sideways.
anyway, I managed to be running down a hallway suddenly all by myself. I went into one of the many doors and found myself in this perfectly silent, huge room stuffed full of curio display cases. so I'm walking through them, taking in all that I see and wondering where to go, when I find my grandma sitting in a rocking chair, crocheting some elaborate lacy concoction. I sit down on a low chair, becoming a large white mushroom since my skirts are so voluminous, and I ask her things like what she's doing, why she's in here, stuff like that, and I tell her about the photographer. she smiles in that "I'm totally laughing at you, silly, but I love you so I won't laugh in your face" kind of way, and she packs up her crocheting and tells me that we're going to go down there, the photographer is going to be gone, and I'll get married and everything will be ok.
so I take her hand and she guides me through the twisting stairs and doors and hallways, and lo and behold, everywhere we go, she just gives people a look and they stop being frantic and just go do what they're supposed to do. another photographer magically shows up and everything goes beautifully. after the ceremony, the groom and the rest of the wedding party and I tear screaming happily across the grassy field, the groom carrying me in my puffy cloud dress on his back. there is an intense feeling of "WOO WE ARE FINALLY MARRIED!!!"
and by intense, I mean it carried over past being semi-woken up and going back to sleep, through subsequent dreams that I don't remember. when I fully woke up, and I knew it wasn't real, I was devastated. there was just something so aligned about it, so right, so FINALLY, such a relief, such a feeling that now we could move forward and stop twisting ourselves in knots, such a joy and exuberance, that it HURTS that it isn't that way. I got out of bed at 10am and it's still eating at me now.
and it's not about the wedding. that whole dream was ultimately not about the wedding. the ceremony wasn't included, and any reception wasn't a part of it at all. I had the man, and a dress, family and friends, a church (complete with priest accessory!), and a photographer. I feel like I'm at the point where it is stupid and stifling to remain unmarried to Wyatt, and do nothing about it.
=^.^=
I was mostly excited and a little nervous, skittering here and there trying to get to the staircase I'd descend to walk down the aisle. then I found out that the photographer was plotting to have the groom and I run into each other before the wedding actually started so she could get "those awesome pictures". now irl I do NOT appreciate photographers who steamroll over their clients' wishes to keep the bride and groom separated until she walks down the aisle. I did in the dream too, and I made sure everyone knew, everywhere I went. I was trying to find the photographer so I could fire her ass and get someone else to do it, and also trying to keep out of the groom's sight, so I was listening to everyone shouting out that I should duck right or turn left or climb these stairs and whatnot. it also reminded me a bit of the staircase scene at the end of Labyrinth, but nothing was upside-down or sideways.
anyway, I managed to be running down a hallway suddenly all by myself. I went into one of the many doors and found myself in this perfectly silent, huge room stuffed full of curio display cases. so I'm walking through them, taking in all that I see and wondering where to go, when I find my grandma sitting in a rocking chair, crocheting some elaborate lacy concoction. I sit down on a low chair, becoming a large white mushroom since my skirts are so voluminous, and I ask her things like what she's doing, why she's in here, stuff like that, and I tell her about the photographer. she smiles in that "I'm totally laughing at you, silly, but I love you so I won't laugh in your face" kind of way, and she packs up her crocheting and tells me that we're going to go down there, the photographer is going to be gone, and I'll get married and everything will be ok.
so I take her hand and she guides me through the twisting stairs and doors and hallways, and lo and behold, everywhere we go, she just gives people a look and they stop being frantic and just go do what they're supposed to do. another photographer magically shows up and everything goes beautifully. after the ceremony, the groom and the rest of the wedding party and I tear screaming happily across the grassy field, the groom carrying me in my puffy cloud dress on his back. there is an intense feeling of "WOO WE ARE FINALLY MARRIED!!!"
and by intense, I mean it carried over past being semi-woken up and going back to sleep, through subsequent dreams that I don't remember. when I fully woke up, and I knew it wasn't real, I was devastated. there was just something so aligned about it, so right, so FINALLY, such a relief, such a feeling that now we could move forward and stop twisting ourselves in knots, such a joy and exuberance, that it HURTS that it isn't that way. I got out of bed at 10am and it's still eating at me now.
and it's not about the wedding. that whole dream was ultimately not about the wedding. the ceremony wasn't included, and any reception wasn't a part of it at all. I had the man, and a dress, family and friends, a church (complete with priest accessory!), and a photographer. I feel like I'm at the point where it is stupid and stifling to remain unmarried to Wyatt, and do nothing about it.
=^.^=