In case there was any doubt over James Potter's sexuality
For sethkyne_blue, who very reasonably asked for glitterboy!Sirius with an "interested" James. I'm sorry, but James decided he'd take over and turn it into a public announcement about his sexuality. ♥
James was straight. Spectacularly so. He liked girls; girls with long hair and big breasts, and he wanked like a trooper and came like the Falls. He could be the poster boy for heterosexual, ridiculously virile young men the world over. And once over again.
Although he definitely liked birds, no question about it, it couldn’t be helped that sometimes the boys demanded a look-in too. It didn’t mean that he was queer or anything.
Really, it was just proof of how tremendously heterosexual he was, and if he wanked over Sirius in his silly smudged eyeliner, or him and his bratty little Slytherin of a brother covered in glitter and very little else, then it was only because he was so straight that there were no more girls left that he hadn't already jerked off thinking about.
It should be a credit to his imagination and supreme erectile talent, rather than cast aspersion on his sexuality.
Surely the same was true if he sometimes thought about the two brothers touching each other, and whilst Lily and the seeker from the Holyhead Harpies certainly made a very pretty picture, getting off on two girls was just so unoriginal. He’d done it a million times and more, and whilst he could get hard just from thinking about the bounce of Lily’s breasts as she stomped away from his attempts at courtship, the Black brothers added an extra certain something to his prick’s nightly visit from his fist.
It certainly didn’t mean anything if he got hard at the sight of Sirius with glitter in inexplicable places, like his belly button or ear or in the three wispy strands that passed as his chest hair. And if his best friend was going to be a girl and wear make up, then no one could possibly blame his cock for reacting to it.
It was just doing its job: tirelessly dedicated to the spread of his seed and it wasn’t to know that Sirius didn’t have the required parts; although he wouldn’t be surprised if he could impregnate him regardless. His sperm were bloody hard bastards and wouldn’t stop at a little thing like that. Not that he thought about fucking Sirius at all.
Because he was straight.
*Came like the Falls was shamelessly nicked from the TV series Game On, because I've been dying to say it for absolutely ages.
James was straight. Spectacularly so. He liked girls; girls with long hair and big breasts, and he wanked like a trooper and came like the Falls. He could be the poster boy for heterosexual, ridiculously virile young men the world over. And once over again.
Although he definitely liked birds, no question about it, it couldn’t be helped that sometimes the boys demanded a look-in too. It didn’t mean that he was queer or anything.
Really, it was just proof of how tremendously heterosexual he was, and if he wanked over Sirius in his silly smudged eyeliner, or him and his bratty little Slytherin of a brother covered in glitter and very little else, then it was only because he was so straight that there were no more girls left that he hadn't already jerked off thinking about.
It should be a credit to his imagination and supreme erectile talent, rather than cast aspersion on his sexuality.
Surely the same was true if he sometimes thought about the two brothers touching each other, and whilst Lily and the seeker from the Holyhead Harpies certainly made a very pretty picture, getting off on two girls was just so unoriginal. He’d done it a million times and more, and whilst he could get hard just from thinking about the bounce of Lily’s breasts as she stomped away from his attempts at courtship, the Black brothers added an extra certain something to his prick’s nightly visit from his fist.
It certainly didn’t mean anything if he got hard at the sight of Sirius with glitter in inexplicable places, like his belly button or ear or in the three wispy strands that passed as his chest hair. And if his best friend was going to be a girl and wear make up, then no one could possibly blame his cock for reacting to it.
It was just doing its job: tirelessly dedicated to the spread of his seed and it wasn’t to know that Sirius didn’t have the required parts; although he wouldn’t be surprised if he could impregnate him regardless. His sperm were bloody hard bastards and wouldn’t stop at a little thing like that. Not that he thought about fucking Sirius at all.
Because he was straight.
*Came like the Falls was shamelessly nicked from the TV series Game On, because I've been dying to say it for absolutely ages.