what you can promise is dependant on what you believe you have
Some days...
I didn't sleep well last night. I felt tired early and went to bed pretty early (23:34, per Jawbone Up) but snapped awake at 4 (3:58) with a heartrate spike (of 78bpm per Garmin's Vivosmart and over 100 per Jawbone's Up3) and I could neither pay attention to youtube clips nor get back to sleep for a few hours afterwards.
I woke up feeling headachy, as if hung over, but haven't had liquor for several days. Usually that means I'm thirsty but the stomach doesn't want water.
In the morning, email from my host says she's gone back to resenting the company despite all the honey-do's she's been requesting and receiving. Back to pressure and instability, which make the promises required for improving earnings empty or unethical to give.
It looks like I'm not going to the local wellness clinic to get my hand looked at today. The place closes at 4pm and I wasn't ready to go there at two. I also won't make it there tomorrow as I'm working. The next opportunity is Monday, another four days from now.
I damaged the hand pretty badly in early December trying to recover keys locked in the bedroom and some pretty basic actions and motions still cause pain. Two and a half months later I can finally type on a light action laptop keyboard but not press on a wall or do a push-up, grip hand tools, carry a tray, etc.
I won't get my bedsheets laundered today either. The house doesn't have a working dryer, things dried inside smell of cigarette smoke and there's rain in the forecast until Tuesday so today would have been the day but my host has wet clothes in the washer and has expressed upset at my washing or drying things she's left there in the past.
The bright spot of my week is the New Dimension Chorus rehearsal, coming up tonight. When I went last week the guys had apparently already gone home.
Instead of getting my fix of musical therapy last week I spent some time at a McDonalds hotspot learning about low budget ways to address to the fairly major engine trouble known as rod knock and got a better understanding of what would have happened to cause that noise.
Brainstorming last weekend gave me a short list of things to do every day. Walk, because physical and mental healing seem to require motion. Feed myself. Take vitamins. Sleep and wake up regularly. Be expressive. Explore.
Today I've dined on just instant coffee and vitamins. I'm not fed. I've taken just 326 and 453 steps per counters on my left and right wrists. I'm not in motion. I slept poorly. I haven't explored any new ideas or techniques. As for expression... you're reading it.
There's still time for breakfast before chorus.
Hugs needed.
_d.
(posting this without filters, for now. If you want your reply kept private, probably best to use email.)
I didn't sleep well last night. I felt tired early and went to bed pretty early (23:34, per Jawbone Up) but snapped awake at 4 (3:58) with a heartrate spike (of 78bpm per Garmin's Vivosmart and over 100 per Jawbone's Up3) and I could neither pay attention to youtube clips nor get back to sleep for a few hours afterwards.
I woke up feeling headachy, as if hung over, but haven't had liquor for several days. Usually that means I'm thirsty but the stomach doesn't want water.
In the morning, email from my host says she's gone back to resenting the company despite all the honey-do's she's been requesting and receiving. Back to pressure and instability, which make the promises required for improving earnings empty or unethical to give.
It looks like I'm not going to the local wellness clinic to get my hand looked at today. The place closes at 4pm and I wasn't ready to go there at two. I also won't make it there tomorrow as I'm working. The next opportunity is Monday, another four days from now.
I damaged the hand pretty badly in early December trying to recover keys locked in the bedroom and some pretty basic actions and motions still cause pain. Two and a half months later I can finally type on a light action laptop keyboard but not press on a wall or do a push-up, grip hand tools, carry a tray, etc.
I won't get my bedsheets laundered today either. The house doesn't have a working dryer, things dried inside smell of cigarette smoke and there's rain in the forecast until Tuesday so today would have been the day but my host has wet clothes in the washer and has expressed upset at my washing or drying things she's left there in the past.
The bright spot of my week is the New Dimension Chorus rehearsal, coming up tonight. When I went last week the guys had apparently already gone home.
Instead of getting my fix of musical therapy last week I spent some time at a McDonalds hotspot learning about low budget ways to address to the fairly major engine trouble known as rod knock and got a better understanding of what would have happened to cause that noise.
Brainstorming last weekend gave me a short list of things to do every day. Walk, because physical and mental healing seem to require motion. Feed myself. Take vitamins. Sleep and wake up regularly. Be expressive. Explore.
Today I've dined on just instant coffee and vitamins. I'm not fed. I've taken just 326 and 453 steps per counters on my left and right wrists. I'm not in motion. I slept poorly. I haven't explored any new ideas or techniques. As for expression... you're reading it.
There's still time for breakfast before chorus.
Hugs needed.
_d.
(posting this without filters, for now. If you want your reply kept private, probably best to use email.)