gosh
man, a lot of things happened. my mom's doing a little better shes home now but shes still got the colonsmpty thing still. I moved back into my parents house and live in the basement. its goin good so far. I have a job finally... YAY... I have to start the tour and all on monday at UPS then ill start from there.. woot woot i have the job... and it pays mmmmm more than my old job ... woot woot imma not sayin anything...
On the other side, my best friend's father died yestersday at 7:51 pm. It's sad but at least hes home in heaven and he isn't suffering anymore. I have to go to the visitations on thursday, and on friday, i have to go to the funeral. My momma is suffering still but she has to have another surgery in nov and get the thingy back to normal so im really happy for her.
An email scared me the other day. I got an email from my ex fiance's ex-gf back from texas. She's pregnant and im glad for her im happy for her and everything i hope things go well for her.
The other thing is... I was really worried about one thing.. i finally can tell you what it is... I thought i was pregnant with riley's cuz i was two weeks late but it turns out i was just stressed out and thats why i didnt start my period on time or anything.
Life is starting to kick me in the ass of right now a lot of bad things are startin to happen around me not to me yet... well on some days i have been really depressed, i havent really got on here much anymore because my mom's comp sucks really bad and i only get on here for 10 minutes or so... Lately i have been hanging out with the deaf posse' and I'm starting to feel like I'm living a double life because i hang out with the deaf world, then i hang out with the hearing world.. its like im a different person id unno ... its complicated but my mom says im the same in either way...
I've been thinking about sean a lot lately which is pissin me off .... i really miss him and i love him to death but i have to move on... at least im nto crying much anymore... he promised me that he would pay the cell phone bill which i ended up paying and other things... *sighs*
I'm just wnating to be single but i feel lonely some times..... I'm talking to this guy named Jerm, i have known him for 4 years and hes like one of my best friends but now we are kinda more than that... its kinda weird.. we have ran out of things to talk about... i really like him, i visit him a lot, and he does sweet things for me... id ont ask him to but he offers... i dont know.. maybe i shouldnt worry about guys anymore... I really miss riley too but most of all... the sad thing is that Sean has my heart... he has stolen my heart that no oen else can get it..... i am just trying to let it go but i can't seem to.... pretty soon it would have been a year on halloween... im ready to cry and i love him to death .... thats why i kind have been avoiding jerm because i dont wanna hurt him while im thinkin bout sean this month... it only has been 2 months and half since sean and i broke up and i haven't moved on yet..... oh yeah im going back to jefferson community college which im psyched.... and im thinkin bout maybe being a certified nursing assistant while working at ups and going to school at the same time to get my education on so i can become a teacher for teh deaf that i alawys have wanted but right now... the path is messed up for me.. i guess ill see once i figure out what i want ....
This song i was just thinkin about is Loving you by Jessica Simpson. This is how I felt about sean but I had to let him go for some couple of reasons.....
Jessica Simpson~Lovin' You
I keep on
I keep on loving
Oh, oh
Oh, oh
Mmm
(I'm gonna keep on loving you)
Mmm
(I'm gonna keep on)
I'm gonna keep on loving you
(Loving you)
Oh
(I'm gonna keep on)
Don't tell me it's time to go
I think my watch is too slow
Please, I don't wanna know
(I don't wanna know)
Baby, what will it hurt
If I stay on tonight
And bring yourself into me
Boy I think you should know
I'm not letting you go
All night
I don't wanna have to say goodnight
Hold tight
I just wanna stay and hold you tight
So right
Feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
Yeah you're like heaven to hold
And you're the flame when I'm cold
(Boy I think you should know)
Boy I think you should know
I'm not letting you go
All night
I don't wanna have to say goodnight
Hold tight
I just wanna stay and hold you tight
So right
It feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
All night
Love me like the rainbow loves the light
Hold tight
Feels me like the raindrops kiss the sky
So right
Feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
I think I should stay awhile and keep enjoying you
Come close, wrap me in your arms
Say you want me too
Intoxicated by the way you're making me move
I know I'm gonna keep on loving you
Oh
(la, la, la, la, la, la)
(So right)
(la, la, la, la, la, la)
I'm gonna keep on loving you
On the other side, my best friend's father died yestersday at 7:51 pm. It's sad but at least hes home in heaven and he isn't suffering anymore. I have to go to the visitations on thursday, and on friday, i have to go to the funeral. My momma is suffering still but she has to have another surgery in nov and get the thingy back to normal so im really happy for her.
An email scared me the other day. I got an email from my ex fiance's ex-gf back from texas. She's pregnant and im glad for her im happy for her and everything i hope things go well for her.
The other thing is... I was really worried about one thing.. i finally can tell you what it is... I thought i was pregnant with riley's cuz i was two weeks late but it turns out i was just stressed out and thats why i didnt start my period on time or anything.
Life is starting to kick me in the ass of right now a lot of bad things are startin to happen around me not to me yet... well on some days i have been really depressed, i havent really got on here much anymore because my mom's comp sucks really bad and i only get on here for 10 minutes or so... Lately i have been hanging out with the deaf posse' and I'm starting to feel like I'm living a double life because i hang out with the deaf world, then i hang out with the hearing world.. its like im a different person id unno ... its complicated but my mom says im the same in either way...
I've been thinking about sean a lot lately which is pissin me off .... i really miss him and i love him to death but i have to move on... at least im nto crying much anymore... he promised me that he would pay the cell phone bill which i ended up paying and other things... *sighs*
I'm just wnating to be single but i feel lonely some times..... I'm talking to this guy named Jerm, i have known him for 4 years and hes like one of my best friends but now we are kinda more than that... its kinda weird.. we have ran out of things to talk about... i really like him, i visit him a lot, and he does sweet things for me... id ont ask him to but he offers... i dont know.. maybe i shouldnt worry about guys anymore... I really miss riley too but most of all... the sad thing is that Sean has my heart... he has stolen my heart that no oen else can get it..... i am just trying to let it go but i can't seem to.... pretty soon it would have been a year on halloween... im ready to cry and i love him to death .... thats why i kind have been avoiding jerm because i dont wanna hurt him while im thinkin bout sean this month... it only has been 2 months and half since sean and i broke up and i haven't moved on yet..... oh yeah im going back to jefferson community college which im psyched.... and im thinkin bout maybe being a certified nursing assistant while working at ups and going to school at the same time to get my education on so i can become a teacher for teh deaf that i alawys have wanted but right now... the path is messed up for me.. i guess ill see once i figure out what i want ....
This song i was just thinkin about is Loving you by Jessica Simpson. This is how I felt about sean but I had to let him go for some couple of reasons.....
Jessica Simpson~Lovin' You
I keep on
I keep on loving
Oh, oh
Oh, oh
Mmm
(I'm gonna keep on loving you)
Mmm
(I'm gonna keep on)
I'm gonna keep on loving you
(Loving you)
Oh
(I'm gonna keep on)
Don't tell me it's time to go
I think my watch is too slow
Please, I don't wanna know
(I don't wanna know)
Baby, what will it hurt
If I stay on tonight
And bring yourself into me
Boy I think you should know
I'm not letting you go
All night
I don't wanna have to say goodnight
Hold tight
I just wanna stay and hold you tight
So right
Feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
Yeah you're like heaven to hold
And you're the flame when I'm cold
(Boy I think you should know)
Boy I think you should know
I'm not letting you go
All night
I don't wanna have to say goodnight
Hold tight
I just wanna stay and hold you tight
So right
It feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
All night
Love me like the rainbow loves the light
Hold tight
Feels me like the raindrops kiss the sky
So right
Feels so right no matter what we do
I'm just gonna keep on loving you
I think I should stay awhile and keep enjoying you
Come close, wrap me in your arms
Say you want me too
Intoxicated by the way you're making me move
I know I'm gonna keep on loving you
Oh
(la, la, la, la, la, la)
(So right)
(la, la, la, la, la, la)
I'm gonna keep on loving you