why cant the past be the past?

[_decried]

i thought i had left all my bullshit past when highschool ended, but it seems i was wrong. i wish the mistakes i made, and the experiences i gained could have never happened. everything ive done in the past is back to haunt me, back to ruin everything ive worked so hard to get. life would be much easier if i had no reputation.

i'm picking up these broken pieces again
i'm feeling like i'm lost and all i do is find you there
we've been here before
i'm never coming back again, not again
tomorrow is too soon for you my dear
i pushed you oh so far away when all i do is want you near
well i've been here before
not coming back again
and i can't sleep
because pretenders never sleep with a smile
it's hard enough to wake up after awhile
and even though i say i'm feeling fine
i'm locked up, loaded down, short a try