And I feel this coming over like a storm again....
My health is SHIT. I'm going back to the hospital for the billionth time for another pointless surgery that won't mean a godamn thing in a year or two. My kidney is losing function. It was working at 40% and now they (the idiot doctors) say that it's been brought down to roughly 35-30%. Why the fuck don't they just take it out? Well it's been a big question to me for some time now and I think I've found the answer: They are liars, cheaters, and they want money. Period. Who gives a fuck what happens to my kidney as long as kindly Dr. Whatshisface can make a profit off of it? "Doctors and thieves, they both wear masks." It's bullshit. This whole situation is proof that within the next 15-20 years TOPS, my kidney will die. I see no point in trying if it's just slowly rotting away like this.
I'm going to start looking around for a doctor who will understand my predicament. I'm tired of having medical and health problems that could be helped with the simple removal of an organ. It's to the point where I just want to hire someone to stab me in the side just so I can get the thing taken out. I look at it as them helping me as opposed to hurting me. I want to live a healthy life, I want to be able to eat and drink what I want without having to worry about how it's going to fuck with my kidney, I want to just my life without what these days feels like a big fucking anchor inside of me, dragging me down. This has to come to an end. One way or the other.