(no subject)
this god damn week could not have possibly been more unenjoyable. it included failing...in many areas, including school, driving, and generally in life. friday: party at denise's house? no. drinking is bad for lauren and only for lauren. starsky and hutch? no. its bad too, only for valerie and lauren. Marmalade cafe? that was ok. watching dvds in bed? no. the screen is too small.
today just got worse: it starts off waking up at 7 to "leave at 7:20 to get to school by 8:30". what? good idea, especially w all the traffic on saturday mornings. i love 12 hour cheer days. so off we go to cheer competition in god damn irvine. you'd think it would be a fun and cheer-filled day--you thought wrong. it was a day that made me question my love for cheer and of how i spend my time in general. it made me realize how much time i've wasted on this pointless activity. after a day of "winning" 3rd and 6th places, lots of drama/arguing/changing routines around/tears/coming to new realizations i come home to an anal dad and a mom who's scared im a lesbian and i am so exhausted/emotional im getting upset over nothing and i dont want to fucking deal with any of these god damn feelings anymore blah.
today just got worse: it starts off waking up at 7 to "leave at 7:20 to get to school by 8:30". what? good idea, especially w all the traffic on saturday mornings. i love 12 hour cheer days. so off we go to cheer competition in god damn irvine. you'd think it would be a fun and cheer-filled day--you thought wrong. it was a day that made me question my love for cheer and of how i spend my time in general. it made me realize how much time i've wasted on this pointless activity. after a day of "winning" 3rd and 6th places, lots of drama/arguing/changing routines around/tears/coming to new realizations i come home to an anal dad and a mom who's scared im a lesbian and i am so exhausted/emotional im getting upset over nothing and i dont want to fucking deal with any of these god damn feelings anymore blah.