Dax and Tai-San "talk" in His Room

[_dax]

Dax left the Cafe silently, he was tired of not being able to break his thoughts of May, his anger at the situation, his anger with himself. He didn't know what he wanted when he arrived back in his room, was he hoping to find May in there? Was he hoping that she'd be in there, reading his note, and the minute he opened the door, she'd forgive him

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[_dax]

Dax frowned, what was that tone about? He shook his head and made sure he closed the door completely this time, listening for the click. He considered locking it too, just in case anyone else weird decided that he was the perfect person to visit with tonight. He had a limit to how much whack job he could take, and Tai-San had reached it quite rapidly. He didn't, however, want to lock May out and give her the wrong impression. He considered looking for a lock with a key, maybe Jack had one in his workshop, and Dax knew there was a key making machine down there, hopefully it'd have a manual and blank keys and maybe he could make a copy of it too. Would the Mall Rats be offended if he locked them out of what was essentially their domain too?

Dax moved to the bed and laid down again as he had before. Her words, demanding to know why he hadn't put his stamp on, they cut him more than she could know. Just today he'd been having issues with not having a place to belong. God, if I lose May what am I going to do, he thought bitterly, I love her, and if I have screwed this up, I'll never forgive myself. I'll lose the woman of my dreams and a Tribe I respect, Dax frowned, he wasn't a man who cried, but if he was, he was sure the tears would be flowing now. Instead, he clenched and unclenched his jaw, thinking over and over about all that he'd lose, and where he'd go. May had told him she didn't want him to leave, she'd said not to leave, but what if time apart, instead of fixing things and talking, had messed it all up instead of fixed it? What if she went out there and got angry and changed her mind. Dax was torn, and now everything Tai-San had said...what was he hiding? He couldn't think of anything he was hiding from anyone, other than his big secret, but he wasn't about to go screaming that into the streets, and anyone who asked knew. He was confused, and she hadn't helped, not one tiny bit.