bangbangboom! and bangbangboom again for good measure.
ha i'm so relieved to finally sit down. i've got the weirdest mix of emotions running through me right now. my heartbeat's going crazy, i don't know what to do with myself at all.
one. frustration and anxiety. i'm pretty damn frantic because i need to find someone to work for me tomorrow night from five to eleven. need. i just tried to call-out and doug said i can't and i have to call people, which requires going in tomorrow morning and getting a bunch of phone numbers and harassing people i work with, assuming anyone is even fucking awake the morning after july fourth. who the fuck would want to take my saturday night shift? yeah that's right, nobody. and if nobody does, then i have no choice. but i absolutely cannot work tomorrow. i've got family obligations for the first few hours and then i've got other shit to do, + my friends are relying on me for this since i have it..
which brings me to two. tonight i did something that i kind-of promised myself i would never do in regards to something else. if you can't figure out it i guess you can ask if you wanna know, it's not a big deal but i'd rather not write it here because i feel lame.
three. i'm embarassed! haha i just IM'd julie saying a bunch of shit and it turns out it wasn't julie, i think it was her mom or something. i hate when that happens! good thing i didn't say anything too bad, hahaha..considering. and you're not picking up yr cell, fruitcake. if you somehow read this before talking to me, CALL ME HASTA PRONTO.
haha nevermind she just called.
anyway, four. i'm dissapointed. once an asshole, always an asshole it seems. unless he's in the mood for otherwise. i'm sick of stupid mindgames and being let down every time. i thought we both knew better.
five. i just had to walk for an hour and a half straight just to get to the car. haha this one kid we were walking with kept turning around and blatantly staring at me, so that kept me amused.
six. there's an underlying happy feeling. i had alot of fun tonight..saw rad people, bonus because this boy i had a mini-crush on remembered me + said hi, that made me smile. and i saw a shitload of fireworks, of course.
god damn.
there's so much shit i have to take care of though, and i really hope it gets straightened out. summer is not the time for worrying, that's what i spent the whole schoolyear doing. i hate worrying, i won't be able to sleep now..i haven't gotten a decent night's sleep in forever but this time it's not by choice. :\
by the way..happy fourth, you guys. ♥
xoalina monroe
one. frustration and anxiety. i'm pretty damn frantic because i need to find someone to work for me tomorrow night from five to eleven. need. i just tried to call-out and doug said i can't and i have to call people, which requires going in tomorrow morning and getting a bunch of phone numbers and harassing people i work with, assuming anyone is even fucking awake the morning after july fourth. who the fuck would want to take my saturday night shift? yeah that's right, nobody. and if nobody does, then i have no choice. but i absolutely cannot work tomorrow. i've got family obligations for the first few hours and then i've got other shit to do, + my friends are relying on me for this since i have it..
which brings me to two. tonight i did something that i kind-of promised myself i would never do in regards to something else. if you can't figure out it i guess you can ask if you wanna know, it's not a big deal but i'd rather not write it here because i feel lame.
three. i'm embarassed! haha i just IM'd julie saying a bunch of shit and it turns out it wasn't julie, i think it was her mom or something. i hate when that happens! good thing i didn't say anything too bad, hahaha..considering. and you're not picking up yr cell, fruitcake. if you somehow read this before talking to me, CALL ME HASTA PRONTO.
haha nevermind she just called.
anyway, four. i'm dissapointed. once an asshole, always an asshole it seems. unless he's in the mood for otherwise. i'm sick of stupid mindgames and being let down every time. i thought we both knew better.
five. i just had to walk for an hour and a half straight just to get to the car. haha this one kid we were walking with kept turning around and blatantly staring at me, so that kept me amused.
six. there's an underlying happy feeling. i had alot of fun tonight..saw rad people, bonus because this boy i had a mini-crush on remembered me + said hi, that made me smile. and i saw a shitload of fireworks, of course.
god damn.
there's so much shit i have to take care of though, and i really hope it gets straightened out. summer is not the time for worrying, that's what i spent the whole schoolyear doing. i hate worrying, i won't be able to sleep now..i haven't gotten a decent night's sleep in forever but this time it's not by choice. :\
by the way..happy fourth, you guys. ♥
xoalina monroe