(no subject)
things are running around in my head right now. and i have this song on repeat. loop. looping around and around. it doesn't have an end or a beginning. and i sort of like that. i wish life were more like that. but not exactly. because i can't stand a constant. i have to have ups and downs. i have to have drama. we all do. mediocrity and simplicity gets boring. and then the drugs start. we crave excitement. anything to keep our minds off our own lives on track. a rut. the sides are much too steep to even begin to climb out of. sometimes i wonder what would happen if i dropped out of college and moved to south america. or just lived off iced tea and snow peas. i actually don't know what these are. i think they are snow peas. all i know is that i stole a whole bunch from ortega tonight and they are crunchy and delicious and there really isn't anything better than raw vegetables. actually. anything raw is good. a natural state of being. people and words and thoughts and music and life. i am not using paragraphs in this entry. and i am also contemplating stopping puncuation. because everything should be open to interpretation. think what you like. it's a full moon tonight. and creativity is born in the day of night. but this fog. something about it i love. and something about it i hate. i want it to wrap me in its arms and blur my eyes and make the yellow light from the street lamps seem to come in pieces. and now it's gone. and i don't know where much of anything is. or where i am. or where i'm going. but it is ok. because i have control over this feeling of utter carelessness.