NOrth carolina is a fine ahhh
welp, here i am hanging out in this airport waiting an ungodly amount of time. i gave up my seat for free round trip tickets, but i'm sooooooooooooooo fakin bored. i just want to sleep but i'm wearing a dress and it seems impossible. kinda bummed because this ruins my layover in phoenix in which i was planning on hanging out with my homie colin. oh well, maybe i'll get bumped on that flight and end up staying in phoenix for the nighty night. my boyfriend would cry, i kind of just want to be home, but it'd get another set of round trip tickets.
so home was mostly fun. i had like a day and half of depression, i don't really know why nothing that bad happened. i just felt really strange being home, everything and one is different but also still the same and it's like this unexperienced indescribable sameness. it's weird. it made me happy to be around so many people that love me unconditionally, i really only have that with one person out there, but i guess that's just something that takes time.
it makes me sad because i think i make my family really sad because i'm happier on the other side of the country without them. i think they fail to realize it's the other side of the country thing i like...not being without them. same with my friends.
i feel pretty content with who i saw. there's not too many people i REALLLLLY wanted to see that i missed, everyone was really bogged down with finals so I can't blame them anyway. I finally got to see lisa and ella. it made me happy, they are qts. It's crazy to me how much ella resembles dustin. It's also crazy to me that my friends have/are having babies, it's funny how when you're young you never think you're actually going to get to be a grown up. haha. or at least i didn't. haha.
i'm all and all very satisfied with my trip. Dylan was so cute when we took him to the butterfly museum, he thought they were cool but would start like flipping out when they would fly by his head, it was adorable. he is getting so big and it's making me sad because i'm missing it. it made me happy to spend time with my brother too, we haven't hung out for real since we were riding bikes together when we were little. He's a really good dad and i never would have expected it.
I'm also pretty stoked that I wasn't like partying everyday i was home and smoking five blunts, while i did smoke some blunts, it wasn't the shit show it usually is. I'm really sick of raging and being irresponsible/selfish. I'm ready to buckle down and finish school and just be a happier more productive person. Don't get me wrong, i'm happy and active, but i'm also a lazy pot head too. Being home gave me some insight into myself, made me realize some things about others that I don't like and see in myself.
The summer is going to be hot like fireeeeee. Ann's coming to visit, hopefully my mom is, it'd be awesome if other people came too. lots of hiking, hopefully a puppy, swimmin in the lake, beaching in the sand, sunning on the rocks. THUNDERSTORMS. Going home to visit at the end of the summer. Life is sweet and I love it, I also need to just keep reminding myself how far a positive attitude can take you.
I guess im done, no one really reads this shit anyway.
so home was mostly fun. i had like a day and half of depression, i don't really know why nothing that bad happened. i just felt really strange being home, everything and one is different but also still the same and it's like this unexperienced indescribable sameness. it's weird. it made me happy to be around so many people that love me unconditionally, i really only have that with one person out there, but i guess that's just something that takes time.
it makes me sad because i think i make my family really sad because i'm happier on the other side of the country without them. i think they fail to realize it's the other side of the country thing i like...not being without them. same with my friends.
i feel pretty content with who i saw. there's not too many people i REALLLLLY wanted to see that i missed, everyone was really bogged down with finals so I can't blame them anyway. I finally got to see lisa and ella. it made me happy, they are qts. It's crazy to me how much ella resembles dustin. It's also crazy to me that my friends have/are having babies, it's funny how when you're young you never think you're actually going to get to be a grown up. haha. or at least i didn't. haha.
i'm all and all very satisfied with my trip. Dylan was so cute when we took him to the butterfly museum, he thought they were cool but would start like flipping out when they would fly by his head, it was adorable. he is getting so big and it's making me sad because i'm missing it. it made me happy to spend time with my brother too, we haven't hung out for real since we were riding bikes together when we were little. He's a really good dad and i never would have expected it.
I'm also pretty stoked that I wasn't like partying everyday i was home and smoking five blunts, while i did smoke some blunts, it wasn't the shit show it usually is. I'm really sick of raging and being irresponsible/selfish. I'm ready to buckle down and finish school and just be a happier more productive person. Don't get me wrong, i'm happy and active, but i'm also a lazy pot head too. Being home gave me some insight into myself, made me realize some things about others that I don't like and see in myself.
The summer is going to be hot like fireeeeee. Ann's coming to visit, hopefully my mom is, it'd be awesome if other people came too. lots of hiking, hopefully a puppy, swimmin in the lake, beaching in the sand, sunning on the rocks. THUNDERSTORMS. Going home to visit at the end of the summer. Life is sweet and I love it, I also need to just keep reminding myself how far a positive attitude can take you.
I guess im done, no one really reads this shit anyway.