I Love You
So many people truly don't understand the meaning of the words. I used to not know. It's amazing what you are willing to put up with thinking that it's for love - but that's not love. Love is ... love is when you look across the room at your significant other and become so overwhelmed with emotion, you could cry. Not because you're sad, but because you love that person so much that it makes you that happy. Love is being able to be yourself knowing they won't judge you. Love means you can act like an idiot, make an ass out of yourself and they will still love you. Love is like a rainstorm. It can come fast, w/out notice, and destroy your life... but it can also be the rain that makes you grow. It can be the rainbow. It can be the lightening that you feel in the pit of your stomach whenever they touch you.
But love isn't what a lot of people think it is. I used to think that I loved my ex, Mike. Used to. I thought that I loved him so much that I would just turn my head when he would do things I knew weren't right. I thought that's what you were suppose to do. Accepting them and loving them meant loving every last bit of them - even the things I hated. But that's not love - that's... puppy love I guess. Obsession maybe? When you love someone, you don't choose to ignore the things you hate or try to accept them. Because when you truly love someone, there is no "settling". Love is loving them - loving their entire being and who they are. If you're ever ashamed of something, you don't love them. If you don't want someone to know everything about that person then you can't really love them. You may think you do, but you don't.
When Blake and I first starting sharing with people that we had an Internet romance, I was hesitant because I didn't want people to judge our relationship based on the fact that we never met. But then I realized, it doesn' t matter. Nothing mattered because I Love Him. I could never be ashamed or care what people would say about us. All that mattered was him.
The first time I ever thought I was "in love", my boyfriend told me "you can't love me". I was so mad because who was he to tell me what I felt? I was furious! But now, I know what he meant. And until you know what he means, you've never been truly in love. Maybe in puppy love and blind - but not love. Love is opening your eyes for the first time and smiling a smile you didn't know you had. That's being in love.