In the end it's right
Do ever feel like you're about to lose everything? I look back at myself like a year ago, and my life now, just seems too good to be true.
Last year......
- I was fat
- I was ugly, and hardly wore any make-up
- I was annoying and dorky
- I had like no friends that wanted to hang out with me
- I thought I was the shit
- stuff like that
This year
- Ash and I were best friends, she's always been mine but we've never been this close.
- I've lost over 30 pounds.
- Most of the time I think I'm pretty and I am
- I have so many friends.
- I get great guys (most of the time)
- I have Brendan who is amazing
- I dont think that I'm half as annoying as I was
- I hang out with people every single day.
- I'm never alone anymore :-D
- My life has gotten soooooo much better.
- I have soooo much more self confidnece
And I feel like I'm losing everything that I have now. There is not one memory from this new me that I would want to forget. All of this just seems so un-real. Like it's all going to just fade away and I'm gonna be alone again which is my greatest fear. Like when I move to Middleburgh, are Ash and I still gonna be best friends or will she find someone else, will all my other friends forget about me. The other night Bren and I were talking and he said that he wanted to go out with me....but he doesnt cus I'm moving. That killed me. I dont want to move anymore. I wish there was a way to have all the benefits of Middleburgh only here so I dont have to leave everyone that I love. And obviously Drew's gonna forget about me.....he doesnt love me anymore so there's no point in him remembering me. I think I'm done with my little rant now.
<3