(no subject)
Wtf. okay. my hands are sweaty and shaky, and its weird. my head is burning up..YES! maybe im sick, whoop!! But seriously. i feel like im walking around in a daze. all i want to do is sit and do something mindless. like play collapse. i dont want to think. so i ate dinner and tried to do the Geo hw, but yeah. failed. like that. I should do something this weekend, so I don't just sit here in my house and think and think until I spontaniously combust. cause..that wouldn't be kool. so yeah. everything's weird, and it's all my fault. yep. should have kept my big mouth shut. why was i cursed with this urge to spill my secrets and stuff at the exact wrong moment? i tried to overcome it, and apparently nothing. so. here we go. A G A I N. history is to repeat itself. -.- but on the bright side.. um.. let me think. uh.. okay. i just tried to think, for real, and I don't see one this time. But maybe I'm just not looking hard enough, right? right. so.. yeah. my big mouth and my retarded judgement has once again, hurt me. but.. I'm trying not to dwell on it, but it's hard. No. from this point on, I'm keeping to myself. There's no point dragging people down who have their own problems, which are so much worse than my own. Theres always someone worse off. I believe that. so. My problems, are my problems. and we are just gonna try and have some fun again. how? I don't know. It's not like i have a million people lined up to call me and do something. But hey, it's never been like that. I'll live. So. (i say so a lot, don't i?) Someone get me happy, cause happy is good. cheerfullness goes a long way. Peachy keen is flippin awesome.
So I'm going to move on. what's in the past, is in the past, and I can't change it now, no matter how hard i try. And I do try, don't even tell me that I don't. But it's time to move on in life, because I can't stay on this or i'll lose my mind.. if i haven't already. OKAY. i'm rambling again. Oh, theres something else I have to say, mkay? (and no, im not talking to you, el jay, concieted!!) I meant what I said. But. (yes but.) I love and value our friendship way more than that, and always will. 'Cause..like your the only person who I can talk to about not just problems but anything random, which is always good. I don't know how to explain how i feel about our relationship..but im going to try. I think it's like best friend//brother/sister//..and well i tried. haha. but anyway, im just hoping that you don't stop talking to me because of that. I really don't want to go through months without talking to you, because that's just not kool. i like to talk to my friends, obviously. hell, i talk to you more than i do my own brother. but oh well. hm what else did i want to say.. oh oh. don't ever think that you should stop telling me stuff just because im not happy 24/7. because.. i usually am. ^.^ and i think reading that hurt more than anything. cause i feel like i've been at least one person that you can confide in, and thats kool. because i like being the one that people can confide in. so yea. But I know that im pretty clingy, and yeah, i apologize for that.. I kinda can't help it. but you have known me since i was 11.. whoa. that just hit me. 3 years whoaa. now that is probably why i'm like this. besides this moron from my school, your the only guy that has known me for that long. not like guys from school cause that's way different. but anyway. yeah. so as long as everything is kool with us, then im good. mkay?
So I'm going to move on. what's in the past, is in the past, and I can't change it now, no matter how hard i try. And I do try, don't even tell me that I don't. But it's time to move on in life, because I can't stay on this or i'll lose my mind.. if i haven't already. OKAY. i'm rambling again. Oh, theres something else I have to say, mkay? (and no, im not talking to you, el jay, concieted!!) I meant what I said. But. (yes but.) I love and value our friendship way more than that, and always will. 'Cause..like your the only person who I can talk to about not just problems but anything random, which is always good. I don't know how to explain how i feel about our relationship..but im going to try. I think it's like best friend//brother/sister//..and well i tried. haha. but anyway, im just hoping that you don't stop talking to me because of that. I really don't want to go through months without talking to you, because that's just not kool. i like to talk to my friends, obviously. hell, i talk to you more than i do my own brother. but oh well. hm what else did i want to say.. oh oh. don't ever think that you should stop telling me stuff just because im not happy 24/7. because.. i usually am. ^.^ and i think reading that hurt more than anything. cause i feel like i've been at least one person that you can confide in, and thats kool. because i like being the one that people can confide in. so yea. But I know that im pretty clingy, and yeah, i apologize for that.. I kinda can't help it. but you have known me since i was 11.. whoa. that just hit me. 3 years whoaa. now that is probably why i'm like this. besides this moron from my school, your the only guy that has known me for that long. not like guys from school cause that's way different. but anyway. yeah. so as long as everything is kool with us, then im good. mkay?