Oct 18, 2007 22:15
Everything is just so old.
I do the same thing every single day.
I'm scared to death for college, but I can't wait to go there.
I'm not ready, but I just want to get the hell away from here.
All I want is to be happy but nothing really makes me happy anymore.
The only time I'm perfectly fine is when I'm singing or sleeping.
I feel like talking to people about it if a waste of their time.
And therefore a waste of my life.
I feel like love is the thing in the world that I hate the most.
It's so stupid. So. Freaking. Stupid.
Everything I do lately is pointless and dull. Tired.
I haven't been this depressed in over a year.
The only good thing that happened to me in the passed few days is getting accepted to Central.
And the only thing I'm looking forward to is Cedar Point on Saturday.
But I don't even know how that's gunna go...
Cuz if Amanda and Dan hang all over each other
Or something like that
Then I'll have to be miserable the whole time
But not show it.
Which leads me to this problem:
If he starts dating her..... we won't be best friends anymore
Cuz he'll always be with her
And I won't want to be there
Cuz it's gunna hurt like hell.
So what the heck do I do?
Someone please tell me what I need to know to get the hell out of this mess....