(no subject)
chapter 14
i'm thinking about you again.
for some reason it seems as though that's a phrase i could use towards you a lot.
i always seem to find myself thinking about you.
well, not exactly you.
the person in which you used to be.
you see, back then,when i was everything.
when i was the world.
your hopes, dreams, fears, you found them all in me.
but not anymore. no, you're too busy with her.
i was the girl you had always waited for, do you recall telling me that?
i bet you don't. even if you did, you would never admit to it.
i'm nothing to you now, or that's how you make it seem at least.
it hurts to look at you.
it hurts to see you and realize that just a few months ago, i knew everything about you, and was such an important part of your life, and now, now i know nothing about you.
well, except for the fact that you're not the boy you used to be.
you're not the boy i thought you were.
you're not the boy who i'd spend every waking moment with in the summer. you're not the boy who got overprotective if another guy even joked around with me. you're not the boy who i could talk to on msn with for hours.
you're not the boy who told me he loved me over and over again and risked getting his heartbroken by me time after time.
so why am i still holding onto you if you're not that boy anymore?
well, it's simple.
sometimes i'll see you, and for that split second when you smile at me, or just look at me with that awkward stare, or i catch you looking at me and then you turn quick when you realize i know, sometimes, i can just see it.
that old person who you used to be.
he's dying to come back out, but i think you're just afraid.
well i'll tell you something.
i love the real you, i really do.
and you would never have to be afraid to be yourself with me.
but why would you want to be?
i mean, you're too good for me now right?
i guess so.
so there it is.
i was thinking about you again.
it's not like it'll be the last time, i know that for a fact.
i just miss you, that's all.
story of my life.
i'm thinking about you again.
for some reason it seems as though that's a phrase i could use towards you a lot.
i always seem to find myself thinking about you.
well, not exactly you.
the person in which you used to be.
you see, back then,when i was everything.
when i was the world.
your hopes, dreams, fears, you found them all in me.
but not anymore. no, you're too busy with her.
i was the girl you had always waited for, do you recall telling me that?
i bet you don't. even if you did, you would never admit to it.
i'm nothing to you now, or that's how you make it seem at least.
it hurts to look at you.
it hurts to see you and realize that just a few months ago, i knew everything about you, and was such an important part of your life, and now, now i know nothing about you.
well, except for the fact that you're not the boy you used to be.
you're not the boy i thought you were.
you're not the boy who i'd spend every waking moment with in the summer. you're not the boy who got overprotective if another guy even joked around with me. you're not the boy who i could talk to on msn with for hours.
you're not the boy who told me he loved me over and over again and risked getting his heartbroken by me time after time.
so why am i still holding onto you if you're not that boy anymore?
well, it's simple.
sometimes i'll see you, and for that split second when you smile at me, or just look at me with that awkward stare, or i catch you looking at me and then you turn quick when you realize i know, sometimes, i can just see it.
that old person who you used to be.
he's dying to come back out, but i think you're just afraid.
well i'll tell you something.
i love the real you, i really do.
and you would never have to be afraid to be yourself with me.
but why would you want to be?
i mean, you're too good for me now right?
i guess so.
so there it is.
i was thinking about you again.
it's not like it'll be the last time, i know that for a fact.
i just miss you, that's all.
story of my life.