Family
My mother is an alcoholic
and well that is the disease that has raced through my family like a plague
My mother, father, grandparents, aunts, cousin all share some form of this disease.
My sister and I have come out of this trial o.k
Yes I drink but only for fun
only on occasions where I know that it wont hinder my health nor my relationships.
I know that my family history provides for me a siseptablity to the disease, along with heart problems.
But I will never let it rule my life as it has so many others in my family.
What is it that makes it so easy to become a need?
Bad memories, genes, or other things?
maybe all of that together.
but I have lived in that enviroment
I have those genes
and yet I haven't anything to say about drinking that I haven't like through my own personal habits.
It's fun to me, like sitting on a marry-go-round, or riding a horse another activity that I excell and do well, I'm a "good drunk" funny, stupid but all around "good drunk"
So why does it hurt so many, why can't my mother or father or any other person in my family say such things about that "drug" of choice?
I love my mother, and enjoy her company, and when she's drunk I may get mad say offal things to her or wish she would stop knowing that it has already consumed her and it will never happen, she will never be just a sober happy mom, but I take care of her a look to that next day for comfort when she will hold my hand and say the wonderful things I know she means and tells my she will love forever like no other.
I only wish my sister could feel the same, she got the brunt of the hell but I stayed longer delt with it longer though I didn't go through it as she did and that I know...
I was lucky in that.
maybe thats why I feel the way I do
maybe because it wasn't so bad for me...
or maybe it was but I was stronger...
so many diffrences in memory,so many lies, so many forgotten moments...
but the pain is still the same...
only, some of us cope with it bette...I guess.
and well that is the disease that has raced through my family like a plague
My mother, father, grandparents, aunts, cousin all share some form of this disease.
My sister and I have come out of this trial o.k
Yes I drink but only for fun
only on occasions where I know that it wont hinder my health nor my relationships.
I know that my family history provides for me a siseptablity to the disease, along with heart problems.
But I will never let it rule my life as it has so many others in my family.
What is it that makes it so easy to become a need?
Bad memories, genes, or other things?
maybe all of that together.
but I have lived in that enviroment
I have those genes
and yet I haven't anything to say about drinking that I haven't like through my own personal habits.
It's fun to me, like sitting on a marry-go-round, or riding a horse another activity that I excell and do well, I'm a "good drunk" funny, stupid but all around "good drunk"
So why does it hurt so many, why can't my mother or father or any other person in my family say such things about that "drug" of choice?
I love my mother, and enjoy her company, and when she's drunk I may get mad say offal things to her or wish she would stop knowing that it has already consumed her and it will never happen, she will never be just a sober happy mom, but I take care of her a look to that next day for comfort when she will hold my hand and say the wonderful things I know she means and tells my she will love forever like no other.
I only wish my sister could feel the same, she got the brunt of the hell but I stayed longer delt with it longer though I didn't go through it as she did and that I know...
I was lucky in that.
maybe thats why I feel the way I do
maybe because it wasn't so bad for me...
or maybe it was but I was stronger...
so many diffrences in memory,so many lies, so many forgotten moments...
but the pain is still the same...
only, some of us cope with it bette...I guess.