wow does anyone remember me?
Well, honestly it doesnt matter if anyone remembers me because this entry's soul purpose is to get some shit out there that should be.
First off, my best friend for the past couple years and friend of 6 years is not really quite my friend at all anymore. Basically something real bad happened in my life that should've never had the chance to happen but what can i say? my head was up my ass. So whatever this terrible thing happened and i confided in my best friend couple weeks later i find out she tells this girl who honestly everyone knows has the biggest fucking mouth in the world. Just so everyone knows trust can be everything in a relationship, even if it's not it could ruin a whole relationship and it doesnt have to be a boyfriend. Remember one thing though! people are all we have in this world... when you find one that really means something to you realize what your doing before you let gossip end a strong friendship real quick.
Sooooooooo about my head being up my ass! a boy, a little fucking boy did something wrong to me a few years ago. so ya if you dont know me and if your reading this you probably dont, i'm tapped in my motha fucking head for real like i love me some drama and ill admit that. So i let him come back, we were just friends but i forgot how much a "friend" can hurt you. i'm not that kinda person i dont let niggas hurt me BUT EVERYONES A FUCKING HYPOCRITE, even miss mary. In the long run i straight fuccckkkeeeddddd myself over. And i could hurt him just as badly but for once im just gonna let it slide and be friends and play nicely - to a certain degree.
So it's almost been a while since jesse died. they say that shit gets easier and i can tell u first fucking hand it really dont, i dont think there will ever be a day that goes by i dont wanna cry about it or call one of my friends to talk about it. And i dont think i'll ever miss him any less. Sure it's less dramatic now but that love don't go away and i never want it to. I think that when people say it'll get better or it'll be fine they either dont know what the fuck they're talking about or they have gone through what i went through and realized that a loved ones death isn't ALWAYS going to be a terrible thing, when i think about jesse now i dont think right away about his death, i think about where he is now and how he's taking care of me and i can talk to him any time of the day i want.
And for anyone that's gonna read this and hate or talk shit.... dont waste your time it aint phazin me and to tell you the truth ill admit me and jesse were on bad terms before he left, but if you were me, which you are not, you'd understand until than talk all the shit you want without any knowledge.
and just to put it out there.... i am marry ty hunt.
i got dibbs and he's agreed to it already.
also gotta do a shoutout reallllllllllllll quick
now for the good shit...
HAPPY FUCKING 18th BDAY AMANDA DECELLE!!! if i cant buy cigarettes lol which im sure will happen, seeing as tho we live in this lovely city thats down with selling crack pipes and materials etc out of convenient store, ill hit you up!!
my life is fucking ill right now for real okay this is coming from Miss "knows how to fuck her life up" yea so tell me, i got my GeD fucking good enough diploma for me, that shits sending me to college along with some rich grandparents. I got my first job today was my first day come visit me ill hook it up wit some food. I love my job to death its at the mall so i see everyone and now everyone knows i got off my lazy ass and got a job. Also, i will be putting my BEAUTIFUL mustang under my name asap. AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF i moved on from mr dickhead couldnt give less of a fuck seeing as though i met the sweetest sexiest mother fucker in brockton. For real like i've had dude treat me all sweet and whatnot and they fuck me over, but after being with SO many i can see right through it, i knew i was getting fucked over the last COUPLE times and i knew i was getting fucked over and my head tampered with but i let it happen. But for real this time like it aint even like that he is honest beyond belief even when i dont wanna hear it and hes on some other shit with him compliments lol like for real this nigga knows what i wanna hear lol but ya fallin....
usually, i'd be pretty pissed right now cause everytime i start likin someone i hate it and i love my single life, i've been single for almost a year and ill admit i love being about to go about my buisness handlin my shit without knowing to ansewer to. But idk something about this nigga for realllllllllllll
and thats my quick summary of my life right now... * kisses*
First off, my best friend for the past couple years and friend of 6 years is not really quite my friend at all anymore. Basically something real bad happened in my life that should've never had the chance to happen but what can i say? my head was up my ass. So whatever this terrible thing happened and i confided in my best friend couple weeks later i find out she tells this girl who honestly everyone knows has the biggest fucking mouth in the world. Just so everyone knows trust can be everything in a relationship, even if it's not it could ruin a whole relationship and it doesnt have to be a boyfriend. Remember one thing though! people are all we have in this world... when you find one that really means something to you realize what your doing before you let gossip end a strong friendship real quick.
Sooooooooo about my head being up my ass! a boy, a little fucking boy did something wrong to me a few years ago. so ya if you dont know me and if your reading this you probably dont, i'm tapped in my motha fucking head for real like i love me some drama and ill admit that. So i let him come back, we were just friends but i forgot how much a "friend" can hurt you. i'm not that kinda person i dont let niggas hurt me BUT EVERYONES A FUCKING HYPOCRITE, even miss mary. In the long run i straight fuccckkkeeeddddd myself over. And i could hurt him just as badly but for once im just gonna let it slide and be friends and play nicely - to a certain degree.
So it's almost been a while since jesse died. they say that shit gets easier and i can tell u first fucking hand it really dont, i dont think there will ever be a day that goes by i dont wanna cry about it or call one of my friends to talk about it. And i dont think i'll ever miss him any less. Sure it's less dramatic now but that love don't go away and i never want it to. I think that when people say it'll get better or it'll be fine they either dont know what the fuck they're talking about or they have gone through what i went through and realized that a loved ones death isn't ALWAYS going to be a terrible thing, when i think about jesse now i dont think right away about his death, i think about where he is now and how he's taking care of me and i can talk to him any time of the day i want.
And for anyone that's gonna read this and hate or talk shit.... dont waste your time it aint phazin me and to tell you the truth ill admit me and jesse were on bad terms before he left, but if you were me, which you are not, you'd understand until than talk all the shit you want without any knowledge.
and just to put it out there.... i am marry ty hunt.
i got dibbs and he's agreed to it already.
also gotta do a shoutout reallllllllllllll quick
now for the good shit...
HAPPY FUCKING 18th BDAY AMANDA DECELLE!!! if i cant buy cigarettes lol which im sure will happen, seeing as tho we live in this lovely city thats down with selling crack pipes and materials etc out of convenient store, ill hit you up!!
my life is fucking ill right now for real okay this is coming from Miss "knows how to fuck her life up" yea so tell me, i got my GeD fucking good enough diploma for me, that shits sending me to college along with some rich grandparents. I got my first job today was my first day come visit me ill hook it up wit some food. I love my job to death its at the mall so i see everyone and now everyone knows i got off my lazy ass and got a job. Also, i will be putting my BEAUTIFUL mustang under my name asap. AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF i moved on from mr dickhead couldnt give less of a fuck seeing as though i met the sweetest sexiest mother fucker in brockton. For real like i've had dude treat me all sweet and whatnot and they fuck me over, but after being with SO many i can see right through it, i knew i was getting fucked over the last COUPLE times and i knew i was getting fucked over and my head tampered with but i let it happen. But for real this time like it aint even like that he is honest beyond belief even when i dont wanna hear it and hes on some other shit with him compliments lol like for real this nigga knows what i wanna hear lol but ya fallin....
usually, i'd be pretty pissed right now cause everytime i start likin someone i hate it and i love my single life, i've been single for almost a year and ill admit i love being about to go about my buisness handlin my shit without knowing to ansewer to. But idk something about this nigga for realllllllllllll
and thats my quick summary of my life right now... * kisses*