(no subject)
I just took a pretty big, nasty shit, and wiped my ass with John Barrow, because according to his commercials on TV, he's double-ply and quilted. In other words, he can soak up much more of my doo doo than Max Burns. I don't really know if that's true though, because Max Burns said the same thing in his add. He can soak up twice as much hershey-stain as John Barrow, leaving my bum fresh and smelling like cherries.
On the other hand, I think my period is starting soon, and I can't decide whether to go buy Mark Taylor or Sonny Perdue. See, Sonny put "be twice as absorbant as the other leading Tampon" on his "Sonny-do list." But Mark Taylor says that Sonny Perdue is going to let me leak all over my panties if I use him to clog my bloody vag. Mark Taylor wants me to buy his product, because I can go swimming or bike riding or horseback riding or anything like that if I stick him up there.
Both of them say that they'll leave me smelling fresh and clean.
Politicians. What a bunch of butt wipes and douche-bags.
On the other hand, I think my period is starting soon, and I can't decide whether to go buy Mark Taylor or Sonny Perdue. See, Sonny put "be twice as absorbant as the other leading Tampon" on his "Sonny-do list." But Mark Taylor says that Sonny Perdue is going to let me leak all over my panties if I use him to clog my bloody vag. Mark Taylor wants me to buy his product, because I can go swimming or bike riding or horseback riding or anything like that if I stick him up there.
Both of them say that they'll leave me smelling fresh and clean.
Politicians. What a bunch of butt wipes and douche-bags.