(no subject)
Stalked again, a rant by _atemu_.
puzzle_master is stalking _atemu_
puzzle_master’s REAL name :
Andres Stroud
puzzle_master’s REAL DOB :
12th July 1982
Height :191 cm
Weight : 65.7 kg
puzzle_master has dreamt about you :
13 times
puzzle_master became interested in you :
14th March 2003
puzzle_master’s latest dream about you
After a brief rendezvous in a unisex spa, the two lovers decide to make kittens behind an unattended reception desk. 5 minutes into the experience David Hasselhoff mysteriously appears at the desk with his hand resting casually on the side of his cheek trying to surpress the grin that by-now has engulfed his face. He steals a glimpse of your genetalia before disappearing as quickly as he came.
This is how puzzle_master describes your relationship behind your back
‘We are just really good friends at the moment. I’d honestly cut off my arm to be with them though’
puzzle_master’s been stealing stuff from your house too.
puzzle_master has stolen all of your baby-photos.
They’ve even started modifying their body for you
puzzle_master recently spent a months salary, tattooing your head onto the inside of both of their thighs.
They sent the following message to you in a Valentines
I think I’ve just creamed myself thinking about you. There’s no tissue paper in the house to clear up the mess so I’ve used this card instead.
The Police
No. calls to the police :
30 times
Your Last Call to The Police
"I’ve had enough of this. You know puzzle_master, that crazed internet stalker you’ve been after for the last 6 months, well they’ve been stalking me too. They were just over at my house there not so long ago and threatened to come back and burn down my house."
puzzle_master’s Police File
puzzle_master may be a hypocrite, a liar and a thief but they are by no means a serious threat to society.
Testimonies about puzzle_master
__yami_no_marik - Pig-hustler
‘To be honest I think _atemu_ and puzzle_master deserve each other. Both of them are fucking idiots.’
egyptianseer - Flaccid Pornstar
‘Fucking hell! This is hilarious for all the wrong reasons. _atemu_ should really be in hospital receiving X-rays to the head.’
ringpriest - Slap-happy
‘How depressing. I feel sorry for _atemu_, he’s kind as fuck to a fault. Always willing to give people the benefit of the doubt. All of this sickens me.'’
bluekisara - Eats everything.
‘I’m sure if you were to look up useless in the dictionary you would see a picture of puzzle_master right beside the definition.’
Why do I think that the prediction about mou hitori no Malik's 'testimony' is 100% correct? I need to stop finding these weird memes or quit staying up late filling out tax forms.
[Private]
Yuriko will not ever be harassing aibou ever again. All it took was a phonecall explaining to her what his husband was thinking about it- and what he would do to her if she continued. She was quite the quick one to understand.
[/Private]