Because Patrick is the most hilarious
He has come up with an idea inspired but this super douchey article on AskMen.com that was featured on Jezebel:
Ask Men think's You're Fat, Wants your boyfriend to tell you so...
(I highly recommend reading it, although it WILL make you angry: the article should be called "AskMen is a website for douchebags and wants to help guys show their fat girlfriends why she should kick his ass to the curb")
But to follow that, I am a pretty terrible housekeeper, mostly in the kitchen area, I never do dishes, I never mop, the floor is gross and when the kitchen is messy I freak out and hide from it (including not cooking/eating) at home.
Patrick is stellar, he actually CLEANS MY KITCHEN... which is special because he DOESN'T even live here (yet), and although he does contribute his fair share of dishes, he does much more than his share of the work. Back story aside, (and based upon the above article)
I give you "Patrick Thinks your (my) Kitchen is Gross and Wants to Make Fun of ASKMEN.com by telling you so in passive aggressive ways..."
1. Take her to other girl's houses who have really tidy kitchens...
2. When he cleans the kitchen, take a photo and leave "clean kitchen" photos around the messy kitchen, additionally, leave kitchen magazines around open to photos of nice kitchens...
3. Sabotage the tidyness by leaving gooey things around on the floor...
4. Improve your own kitchen (divide the kitchen in two a la "I love lucy" and keep your half really tidy) Shaming facial expressions are a nice touch here...
5. Buy her kitchen stuff that she has no place for since there is SO much kitchen stuff...
... I might clean the kitchen today...
Ask Men think's You're Fat, Wants your boyfriend to tell you so...
(I highly recommend reading it, although it WILL make you angry: the article should be called "AskMen is a website for douchebags and wants to help guys show their fat girlfriends why she should kick his ass to the curb")
But to follow that, I am a pretty terrible housekeeper, mostly in the kitchen area, I never do dishes, I never mop, the floor is gross and when the kitchen is messy I freak out and hide from it (including not cooking/eating) at home.
Patrick is stellar, he actually CLEANS MY KITCHEN... which is special because he DOESN'T even live here (yet), and although he does contribute his fair share of dishes, he does much more than his share of the work. Back story aside, (and based upon the above article)
I give you "Patrick Thinks your (my) Kitchen is Gross and Wants to Make Fun of ASKMEN.com by telling you so in passive aggressive ways..."
1. Take her to other girl's houses who have really tidy kitchens...
2. When he cleans the kitchen, take a photo and leave "clean kitchen" photos around the messy kitchen, additionally, leave kitchen magazines around open to photos of nice kitchens...
3. Sabotage the tidyness by leaving gooey things around on the floor...
4. Improve your own kitchen (divide the kitchen in two a la "I love lucy" and keep your half really tidy) Shaming facial expressions are a nice touch here...
5. Buy her kitchen stuff that she has no place for since there is SO much kitchen stuff...
... I might clean the kitchen today...