Get Well Soon Kurenai!
*sigh* I hate this village. I was gone so long on that mission with Ibiki I forgot how much it sucked. Oh, don’t get me wrong. It’s done a lot for me in my life and still does. I enjoy being a ninja for Konoha. The reason I hate this damn town though is... I was at the bar last night looking for a guy. My standards are not to high. Jounin Level Only. Needs to be hot. And top of the class for handling jutsu. And has to know at least one forbidden jutsu. All these goodie goodie bastards in Konoha makes me sick.
So. Yeah. No hot guys for Anko. I tried though. I honestly tried. I feel like Kurenai now, unable to get a date. *sigh* - And the first person to suggest Ibiki to me, WILL get them selves killed quicker then you can say “I think she’s going to kill me.” - Sure, he fits the criteria, he’s a jounin, he’s hot, he’s talented. But oh my god is that man the most annoying person on the planet. So, no thank you. Eh, I’ll continue the boyfriend hunt some other time. Maybe I’ll just go out and get my self laid, that should hold off my urges to have a boyfriend for at least a day or two.
Why am I so concerned about getting a boyfriend you ask? Well. I took a look at Kurenai. She’s a couple years older then me, and has been single as long as I can remember. And I do not think she’s been laid in the last decade. If ever. And suddenly I’m left to think: If I’m still single when I’m as much of an old hag as she is, will I be that uptight? Oh god. That thought just gives me nightmares. Speaking of getting laid and Kurenai...
I visited her in the hospital earlier today. She seemed in good spirits, but totally weak. Was almost pathetic to see her laying in that hospital bed so sick. Why? Powerful Ninja, taken down by a glass of water. Real Smooth.
I brought her some supplies I figure she’d need. I found this jumbo box of dango in one of the stores near my house. Think each box has like 500 or so packages in it. So I bought a couple...Alright, I bought 47 of the Jumbo Boxes. I’d like to point out I do now have a years supply... well... maybe a months. So. Yeah. I donated one full jumbo box of Dango to her.
What is that with out beer though? So, I had a couple left over cases laying around the house. I figured I would bring her a case or two. She is now the proud owner of two cases of beer... And considering the major factor here being: She’s not me. That beer and dango should last her quite a while. Well, while I was showing her the beer I noticed she could not move to much. So, considering how good of a friend Kurenai is to me, I figured I would return the favor.
I came back twenty minutes later, and I can announce this to the world now. Kurenai is now the proud honor of a 4-Can Beer Dispensing Hat. I even strapped it to her head and showed her how to work it. As she can barley move, she might need to get one of the nurses to refill it once it’s empty. She looked over joyed. She can now sip beer in style. ^_^
Oh, yeah. Speaking of those nurses. I wonder if that Yagazi guy finally got around to doing what I paid him to do. I swear that woman will thank me once she gets laid. Konoha, say bye bye to uptight Kurenai. Well... provided that poor kid does not chicken out. I’ll have to kick his ass and get my money back from him if he does chicken out. Kurenai better enjoy it. I mean come on, the things I do for a friend.
So. Yeah. No hot guys for Anko. I tried though. I honestly tried. I feel like Kurenai now, unable to get a date. *sigh* - And the first person to suggest Ibiki to me, WILL get them selves killed quicker then you can say “I think she’s going to kill me.” - Sure, he fits the criteria, he’s a jounin, he’s hot, he’s talented. But oh my god is that man the most annoying person on the planet. So, no thank you. Eh, I’ll continue the boyfriend hunt some other time. Maybe I’ll just go out and get my self laid, that should hold off my urges to have a boyfriend for at least a day or two.
Why am I so concerned about getting a boyfriend you ask? Well. I took a look at Kurenai. She’s a couple years older then me, and has been single as long as I can remember. And I do not think she’s been laid in the last decade. If ever. And suddenly I’m left to think: If I’m still single when I’m as much of an old hag as she is, will I be that uptight? Oh god. That thought just gives me nightmares. Speaking of getting laid and Kurenai...
I visited her in the hospital earlier today. She seemed in good spirits, but totally weak. Was almost pathetic to see her laying in that hospital bed so sick. Why? Powerful Ninja, taken down by a glass of water. Real Smooth.
I brought her some supplies I figure she’d need. I found this jumbo box of dango in one of the stores near my house. Think each box has like 500 or so packages in it. So I bought a couple...Alright, I bought 47 of the Jumbo Boxes. I’d like to point out I do now have a years supply... well... maybe a months. So. Yeah. I donated one full jumbo box of Dango to her.
What is that with out beer though? So, I had a couple left over cases laying around the house. I figured I would bring her a case or two. She is now the proud owner of two cases of beer... And considering the major factor here being: She’s not me. That beer and dango should last her quite a while. Well, while I was showing her the beer I noticed she could not move to much. So, considering how good of a friend Kurenai is to me, I figured I would return the favor.
I came back twenty minutes later, and I can announce this to the world now. Kurenai is now the proud honor of a 4-Can Beer Dispensing Hat. I even strapped it to her head and showed her how to work it. As she can barley move, she might need to get one of the nurses to refill it once it’s empty. She looked over joyed. She can now sip beer in style. ^_^
Oh, yeah. Speaking of those nurses. I wonder if that Yagazi guy finally got around to doing what I paid him to do. I swear that woman will thank me once she gets laid. Konoha, say bye bye to uptight Kurenai. Well... provided that poor kid does not chicken out. I’ll have to kick his ass and get my money back from him if he does chicken out. Kurenai better enjoy it. I mean come on, the things I do for a friend.