if things seem to turn out wrong.

[_amyism]

I'm so tired.
I just want to stay in bed, for maybe 20 million hours, cuddled up in down and fleece.
HOCR was a good experience. not amazing or life changing, but a good experience.
now that it's over, I'm a little...let down. this was going to be a GOOD year, hard, but really good, and instead, everything fell apart, is falling apart, and now I have all these doubts about all the work and time and effort I've put it in, and all the things I've missed, that I am missing, and I wonder what the fuck I'm going to do with it all.
to top it all off, um...sexual frustration, anyone?
school is no longer an escape, it's part of the problem.
I NEED my next 2 weeks off. not just to mess around for a couple hours, but to just get caught up with everything- sleep, work, friends. I won't let myself lose it, but I know how hard this winter will be. I'm not going to rush into it too fast.
jealousy is painful.
awkwardness...is painful.
and this much confusion hurts, it really does.

i waited for you winterlong
you seemed to be where I belong
it's all illusion anyway
if things should ever turn out wrong
and all the love we have is gone
it won't be easy
on that day
waiting to follow
through the dream light of your way
is not so easy for me now
after time has passed your way
things we thought of yesterday
come back now
come back now