(no subject)
So i thought i had everything figured out..a couple times. first i decided that i was going to forget all about noah and try this ryan thing. But then i chickened out and got scared that i would lose noah as a friend and get into something that would last. but now im having second thoughts on it all. I think about how I loved being with noah, and how we made this relationship to where i didnt want to leave him. and now that is gone and we're both very much aware of that, and i have the chance to make that kind of relationship with somone else, except this time ihave the chance to make it last. Ryan and i have so much in common, and i know he wants a lot of the same things i want. I know he would treat me right. and thats what i want. But there are still some things that bother me about the idea. I dont feel very comfortable around him, but maybe thats just because i dont know him well enough yet. and theres some other stuff but its kind of personal. I don't want to get with him and then realize its not a good idea, but i dont want to not date him and blow my chance. ya know? im so confused right now. Every day i have a different look on it. im not sure...its really stressing me out tho. i duno why. i desserve someone like ryan, but honestly, its a completely different issue to realize the relationship is over, and to start a completely new one with somone else. It's hard. and to be completely honest im a little nervous. im afraid i will make the wrong decision and regret it. and ugh! i dont know!!!!