not a slut
why am i not a slut? after being told things like, "youre not important, stop acting like it" and, "you have always been in the way" by my dad, i wonder why i dont look for father figures, or at least more attention from guys. maybe because i believe all that. im not really sure how to tell how i feel (or how to write understandable sentences). im not fishing for e-compliments here, but i think i really believe a majority of the things that he has said to me in anger or stupidity. "you look like youve been eating well" ok, now im fat. "youve always been in the way" ok, i must be in everyones way then. maybe that has something to do with the fact that im so obese. "youre so full of shit" everyone must think im full of shit, im just going to keep my mouth closed, and im never going to initiate with anybody, becasue everybody thinks im full of shit, and if somebody initiates with me, they probably just want to see how full of shit i am. maybe i should develop an addiction to laxatives. that might help weight problem also.