read this please.
I'm sick of all the fakes. I'm sick of everyone who doesn't want to leave their cliques to try and do something new. I'm sick of the preppy girls, the ones who are so fucking fake that it's written across their face in eyeliner. I wish things would change. But on the other hand, I'm sick of change too. I need something constant, and comforting. I haven't been in a mood like this for probably three weeks, when I told my dad I liked the sound of clocks ticking because it was so constant, always staying the same between the ticks. And he asked me if there was something wrong with me.
I'm starting to think there is something wrong with me. My moods change from almost depressed to happy so fast it scares me. Sometimes I stay sad for weeks at a time, even though I come off as happy most of the time. When I make people laugh, it makes me feel good. Sometimes I don't want to be happy. I don't know why explaining my feelings through a computer screen.
I hardly hang out with anybody anymore. All I do is sit at home and think like this. At school, I'm alone most of the time, in the hallways and in class. And I kind of like it. I'm afraid of becoming completely anti-social. I hope it doesn't go that far.
Mainly two people are responsible for helping me get through this, and that's Lance and Paul, and I love them for that. Not like boyfriends or anything, I just know that we're going to be friends for a very very long time. And if we don't, I don't know what I'd do.
I'm starting to think there is something wrong with me. My moods change from almost depressed to happy so fast it scares me. Sometimes I stay sad for weeks at a time, even though I come off as happy most of the time. When I make people laugh, it makes me feel good. Sometimes I don't want to be happy. I don't know why explaining my feelings through a computer screen.
I hardly hang out with anybody anymore. All I do is sit at home and think like this. At school, I'm alone most of the time, in the hallways and in class. And I kind of like it. I'm afraid of becoming completely anti-social. I hope it doesn't go that far.
Mainly two people are responsible for helping me get through this, and that's Lance and Paul, and I love them for that. Not like boyfriends or anything, I just know that we're going to be friends for a very very long time. And if we don't, I don't know what I'd do.