(no subject)
to update, or not to update? that is the question...
ah to hell with it. *grins* sorry for keeping you waiting... i was inunduated with birthday parties and making birthday presents (marie, you better damn well LOVE this present, it's taking me DAYS! ;) *kisses*) and then an EVIL ass math project at the last minute... but i'm here now, bearing gifts - 2 very long, uber cute chapters to make up for lost time. Sound good? Good.
So, you know the deal. Don't know em, don't own em, and this never happened. I do, however, own the storyline and I own Anna's character. If you steal any of my work, there will be no more vam cookies for you EVER and i will set a very hungry Raab loose on you. *nods resolutely*
Links
Archive 1-25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
There was one week of school left before they got let out for Christmas break. Bam was going back to West Chester for Christmas; and it just so happened that they’d be getting back on exactly the same day as when they arrived in Finland for the first time. Bam sat in all his classes, staring at the wall, thinking about this. Had it really already been a year? So much had happened. When school let out, he ran to Ville’s locker, to catch him before he disappeared to go find Jesse.
“Ville!” Ville turned around.
“Yeah?”
“Um… what are you doing? Like, right now?”
“I was going to go home; Jesse and I have a PlayStation tournament that we never quite finished 4 years ago… and we’re going to finish it now. Why?”
“Oh… um, never mind. I’ll see you later then.”
“No, wait, Bam. What did you want?” Ville’s hand was on Bam’s arm, pulling him towards himself.
“I dunno… just wanted to see if you wanted to go into town… they have all the lights up and its snowing and its all nice… but if you’re busy its okay.”
“No. Come on lets go. I’ll call Jesse, tell him we’ll do it later.” Bam smiled and threw his arms around Ville’s neck. Anna passed them on her way out and laughed; they were literally eating each other’s faces.
“Get a room!” she yelled at them. Bam started laughing in the middle of the kiss, and so they gave up. Bam had to put all the appropriate layers on before he could venture outside - Ville watched him pile on sweaters and coats and mittens and scarves amusedly, sticking his own arm through a single, but very warm long black jacket, pulling on a pair of mittens and a scarf, and of course the beanie which he just wore all the time anyways.
“You look like the Michelin tire man, Bam,” he said, giggling. Bam swatted him away.
“It’s fucking cold in this country, okay? And I thought it got cold in Philly… god…” Ville laughed, taking his gloved hand in his own.
“Come on Michelin Man… lets go.” Bam glared at him; they had to run to catch the bus into town, but they made it. Anna was on it too, so they swung into the empty seat next to her. Bam put Ville on his lap, wrapping his arms around his waist.
“Hello,” she said, rolling her eyes at them. “You two look happy.”
“It’s snowing!” said Bam energetically.
“Yes… well… this is Finland. It does that a lot here Bam.”
“Yeah but… its snowing!” Anna looked at Ville.
“What did you do to him?” Ville shrugged.
“I’m not sure. He’s just happy.” Anna laughed.
“Hey Anna. Guess who’s coming home tonight,” Bam said, poking her. She looked at him with wide eyes.
“Really? He never told me!”
“Yeah, well he wanted to surprise you but I know you’re pissed off at him so I decided to tell you so that you can surprise him. He was bitching on the phone ALL last night about how much he missed you. God I almost went crazy.” Ville and Anna laughed. “Did you know that in 2 and a half weeks I will have been here for a whole year?”
“Really?” said Ville, looking down at him. Bam nodded. The bus stopped in the middle of town and they piled out into the freezing air. Bam shivered; Ville wrapped his arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer.
“Yeah, that’s about right,” says Anna. “Wait, are you going home for Christmas?” Bam nodded.
“What? You are?” Ville let his arm slide from Bam’s shoulders.
“Uh… yeah…”
“Were you planning on telling me anytime soon or were you just going to leave and let me figure it out by myself?”
“Oh, I was going to tell you today. But I forgot.” Bam put an arm around Ville’s waist. “Don’t be mad.”
“I’m not… but there go my plans for Christmas…”
“Oh… I’m sorry…” Anna laughed.
“You two are so soppy it’s ridiculous,” she said. Bam punched her with his free arm.
“Shut up. I’ve heard you and Jess being soppy too. You can’t talk.” Anna laughed.
“Okay, okay. But I still think you guys are funny.”
“Why?” asked Ville.
“Because… you are. You’re so cute. And I remember… a year ago you hated each other. Bam was even mad at you for saving him from that fight because he just didn’t like you.” They both laughed, and then looked at each other.
“You were mad at me for saving you?” Ville asked. Bam shrugged.
“You were a fucking asshole back then.”
“Thank you.”
“But you’re not anymore.”
“Good.”
“I love you,” Bam said, trying to keep it to a whisper, but Anna heard him, and promptly burst out into laughter. Bam blushed, but Ville just kissed him and told him that he loved him too, and then raised his voice and told him to “ignore that whore, she’s not worth it,” which earned him a slap from the “whore”. Eventually, she had to leave them to go up to her apartment. Bam let go of Ville’s waist to hug her, she gave Ville a short kiss on the cheek like a true European, and then bounded down the alley, pulling out the iPod that she had saved up for for months. Bam shook his head as he watched her disappear around another snow covered corner. Ville started walking, and Bam ran to catch up with him, sliding his arm around his waist again.
“She’s great,” said Ville quietly.
“She is.”
“Does she still hate me?” Ville asked him seriously. Bam shook his head.
“Are you kidding? Anna doesn’t hold grudges if people apologize. She doesn’t hate you at all. I don’t think she ever did - you just really, really hurt her.” Bam shrugged. “But its okay now. She loves you very much, I think; she loves all her friends with her whole heart.”
“She is amazing.” Ville shook his head. “So what do you wanna do?”
“I dunno… let’s go to that Christmas market thing… I need to buy people presents.” So they headed to the market place, where there were rows and rows of booths set up, covered in snow and lights, and chock full of knick knacks. The vendors huddled next to their electric heaters, wearing more layers than Bam and clutching blue mugs of hot mulled wine in gloved hands, their fingers sticking out of them like little white-blue sausages. Christmas songs, both those familiar to Bam and traditional Finnish ones, seemed to be floating in the air, and the whole thing was magical. Bam broke out in a huge smile as they walked through the tight rows, looking through all the hundreds of things that were on offer; they picked some up to examine, laughed at some, cooed over others. Ville had slipped one of his gloves off and squeezed his hand inside Bam’s, and then put both of their hands in his coat pocket. Bam bought presents for his whole family and the rest of their friends, Ville’s family, and saw several things which would do for Ville’s present. When he started shivering, Ville pulled him into a little heated hut on the side of the market and placed a large cup of mulled wine in his blue hands. It had been dark outside for a few hours, but now it was really getting dark, and very cold.
“You done shopping?” Ville asked.
“Just about. I dunno what to get you… you’re impossible to shop for.” Ville chuckled.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll love anything you get me.”
“I know, but it has to be perfect.” Bam nodded resolutely, sipping the scalding wine. Ville smiled, and brushed a lock of hair from Bam’s face.
“Wanna go out to dinner?” Ville asked. Bam shook his head.
“I can’t. April’s made this amazing cake and like, I need to eat it. Before Phil gets to it. And Jess is coming home and we’re supposed to start packing, because we need to do ‘smart packing’ because we’re going to be bringing so much stuff back… because April’s going crazy because she can’t get anything she needs here. We’re taking like, 4 empty suitcases. It’s crazy.” Ville chuckled.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving me at Christmas!” he said.
“Sorry… I’d love to stay with you… but I’m going home, Ville! Home! For like, the first time in a year.” He said this smiling, almost bouncing on his stool. Ville tried to smile, but he felt kind of uncomfortable. He resented Bam’s attachment to Philadelphia. It made him feel like he wasn’t good enough, like they all weren’t good enough to make him happy. He didn’t understand how anyone could want to be anywhere besides Finland. But then again, he couldn’t imagine how painful it would be to leave, and so he didn’t know what Bam was going through.
“I’m glad you’re going home, but… I’m going to miss you.” Bam sighed.
“I’ll miss you too. Come on, why don’t you come over for dinner? April’s been saying that she hasn’t seen you for a while, and she misses feeding you, because we don’t compliment her as much as you do, and her ego needs a boost.” Ville thought this over. Dinner with Bam, or going home to Jesse, it was difficult. But Bam was pouting at him with his adorable blue eyes and perfect pink lips and he just couldn’t resist.
“Okay. April’s cakes are amazing…” Bam smiled. They finished their wine and then ventured out into the blistering cold. The wind had started blowing now, and they cuddled up against it as they walked to Bam’s house. Bam had forgotten his keys, so they rang the doorbell. Phil opened the door and they rushed in the house, still clinging to each other, with rosy cheeks and bright eyes. Phil frowned - but he put it down as a Finnish thing and tried to ignore it as they ran up the stairs hand in hand. Bam pulled the door shut behind them and fell to the floor in laughter. Ville was taking his coat off carefully.
“What’s so damn funny?”
“Did you not see Phil’s face?”
“No… why?”
“He looked like the sky had just fallen on his head!”
“What? Why? Wait… Bam… you did tell him, right?” Bam shook his head, still laughing. “Bam. You naughty boy.”
“Yeah baby, you know you like it.” Ville raised an eyebrow at him, throwing his neatly folded coat on the bed.”
“Brandon, you know I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Call you what, Brandon?”
“That!”
“Whatever, Brandon.”
“Ville!!!!”
“Yes, Brandon?” Ville’s eyes twinkled with laughter.
“Fine, Hermanni.” Ville’s eyes narrowed. Bam smiled innocently - and then received a pillow full in the face. Bam was on his feet in seconds, tackling his boyfriend into the bed and commencing to tickle him until he was screaming.
“You asked for it!” Bam said, continuing to tickle him. Ville squirmed helplessly, screaming and laughing. Bam took mercy when Ville started gasping for breath; and kissed him instead. They were rolling around on the bed, lips locked and Ville still trying to get revenge on Bam, when Phil opened the door to call them to dinner. He stopped dead in his tracks, watching his son roll around on a bed with another man’s son. Without saying anything, he left, thoughts whirling around in his head. He sat down at the table, staring at his plate without really seeing it.
“Phil? Did you call them?” Phil shook his head. “What’s wrong?”
“I just… they’re… he’s… what’s going on?!” April was confused for a second before she heard Ville’s voice upstairs.
“Ooohhh… you mean that?”
“What?”
“Bam and Ville.”
“Yeah! April… they’re… cavorting on Bam’s bed!” April shrugged.
“Well. I guess that’s what couples do nowadays.”
“Couples?!”
“Phil, Bam and Ville have been dating for 5 months. Haven’t you noticed?”
“5 months?! Dating?! What?! My son is gay?!” Jess walked in the room at this moment.
“Yeah… didn’t you know Dad?”
“Uh, no! Thank you everyone for telling me!” April shrugged.
“I thought it was fairly obvious; he said he was going to tell you, anyways.”
“Well he didn’t. I’m not sure whether to be angry, or just keep being very disturbed.”
“Don’t be either,” said April. “He doesn’t need either of those. What he needs is for you to be supportive.”
“So I’m supposed to be supportive of his choice, which goes against all of my morals?”
“Yes. Because you’re his father.”
“Anyways, nothing you say is going to make Bam give Ville up. He cares about him too much,” said Jess, shrugging. Phil sighed.
“Jess, call them down, they’re going to starve.”
“It didn’t look to me like they cared much about food,” said Phil.
“Oh, leave them alone. I think they’re cute together,” said April.
“Yeah… so cute it’s going to make me gag.”
“Oh, shut up. You’re just boring. Be happy that he’s finally found something to make him happy!” Jess called them down, and they came bouncing down the stairs, still laughing and red cheeked.
“Did you boys have a nice time in town?” asked April.
“Yeah. We went to the Christmas market, went Christmas shopping,” Bam said, sliding into the bench, pulling Ville after him. “It was freezing cold though.” Ville rolled his eyes.
“It is not that cold, Bam.”
“It is!”
“Whatever.” April smiled at them and started serving the dinner. They ate quite quickly and relatively quietly, most of the conversation flowing between Bam and Jess. Phil didn’t say anything, just watched them discreetly. April cleared away the plates and gave them all a piece of cake. Ville thought that he could live off of April’s cakes and never say a single word in complaint. When he was done with his own piece of cake, Phil cleared his throat and looked at Bam and Ville, who were now giggling and whispering to each other.
“So… you boys are … an item?” They looked over at him, a little shocked. Bam nodded. Phil took a deep breath.
“Bam… why didn’t you tell me before?” Jess and April had quietly slipped away.
“I forgot… I meant to, but it slipped my mind. What with Jesse and all that.” Phil frowned.
“Bam, you know that this goes against all of my … I dunno, morals, ideas, what have you. But … I trust that you’re making the right decision for yourself.” Bam nodded - Ville had slipped his hand into Bam’s and Bam was glad of its light pressure. Phil sighed.
“Ville… you’re going to look after my son, right?”
“I’m doing the best I can, sir.”
“Don’t call me sir. I’m not that old.” He looked between them. “Well, if it makes you guys happy, then - good luck.” He smiled despite himself. “Ville… I imagine your parents know already, right?” Ville nodded. “And they’re okay with it.”
“Yes.”
“Right. Well then. I guess… that’s that.” He nodded to them, stood up, and left them alone. Once he was out of hearing range, Bam turned to Ville.
“He hates it,” he said. Ville sighed and put his arms around Bam.
“But he’s trying to be supportive… give him points for that.” Bam shrugged.
“He has no choice - he knows I wouldn’t listen to him anyways.”
“Just give him a chance, he’ll come round. No-one can resist my charm!” Bam laughed, cuddling into him.
“Thank you.”
“No problem. I’d better go now; I might freeze my ass off walking home.”
“That would be horrible!”
“I know.” Ville ran upstairs to get his things, coming back to find Bam leaning his head on the table. “Don’t worry about it Bam. It’ll be fine.”
“I know.”
“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.”
“Love you too.” Bam kissed Ville goodbye, and locked the door behind him. He found his parents in the living room.
“Phil?”
“Yes son?”
“I’m sorry…”
“What for?”
“I dunno… this whole thing…”
“Why?”
“Because… I know you… expected something else from me.”
“Bam, it doesn’t matter what I expected. Honestly. What matters is that you’re doing what’s right for you.”
“All we care about is that you’re happy Bam, you know that,” April said quietly. Bam nodded.
“Are you happy with him?” Phil asked.
“Yes,” Bam said, after a small pause.
“Well then. Don’t worry. We’re right behind you,” Phil said. April nodded in agreement.
“Thanks.” Bam smiled at them and then turned and ran up stairs.
Chapter 30
The last week of school passed quickly. It was, of course, freezing outside, so Bam didn’t do much besides sit around in his house. Ville had, for the rest of the week, been with Jesse after school. However, on Friday, Ville managed to get Bam’s attention while he was in Biology and they went off to the bathroom together, just like they had done a month or two ago.
“What’s up?” Bam asked, as Ville lead him into a stall.
“Nothing… I wanted to kiss my boyfriend,” Ville said. Bam smiled, and opened his lips to Ville.
“What are you doing tonight?” Ville asked him.
“Um… packing.”
“No you’re not.”
“I’m not?”
“No. You’re coming out with me and we’re going to go get drunk.”
“No… dude I couldn’t handle a 10 hour plane ride with a hang over.”
“Fine then. We’re going out, and I’ll get drunk. Or I won’t. Whatever. But we’ve got to because I have to give you your presents and … you’re going to be gone for a whole week and a half!”
“No… 2 weeks. I’m missing some school.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah…”
“Oh my god I’m going to die.”
“You’ll be fine.”
“That’s what you think.”
“Whatever Ville. Okay, so we’re going out tonight.” Ville nodded. “Anyone else coming?”
“I dunno… I guess if they want… but I want some time alone with you Bammie.”
“Okay.” They kissed quickly, and then Bam ran back to class so that no-one got too suspicious.
They had all walked out of the school doors in a big, happy group of people. Jess had been waiting for Anna, and she’d run up to him and pounced on him. They smiled at each other all the way to the bus stop. The bus took the big and very loud group to the center of town, where they all got out and headed to Mc Donald’s for nourishment. After burning part of a table, leaving several new spit balls on the ceiling and making one of the cleaners cry, the rowdy group of friends walked out of Mc Donald’s and took to the cold streets. Someone found an alleyway sheltered from the wind, and they all sat down. Their laughter could be heard for blocks. After a while, the couples - namely Anna and Jess, Ville and Bam, Linde and some girl who Bam had never really noticed before but who was actually really pretty - stood up one by one and left everyone else to their booze. Ville steered Bam away from the main center of the town to a park just a few blocks away. It was completely covered in snow, and there was a giant Christmas tree in the middle, decorated with simple white fairy lights and red and gold balls. Ville pulled several blankets out of his bag - he had brought Jesse’s large sports bag to school instead of his East Pack so that he could carry all the things he needed. Bam watched him pull out a tarp in amazement.
“What is this?” he asked. Ville smiled.
“We’re having Christmas right now. This is what I was gonna do on Christmas… but you’re not here.”
“What are we doing?”
“You’ll see. Do me a favor? Go take a walk around the block and come back in 5 minutes so I can set this up?” Bam rolled his eyes at him, but obeyed. After he set up the oil lantern so that he could see, Ville spread the tarp out right underneath the huge tree’s low branches, over the deep snow. He dug around in the snow for rocks, and placed them on the edges of the tarp. Then he put one blanket down on the tarp. He pulled out the little collapsible table that his mom had used when she was bedridden, some candlestick holders and tall, deep red candles. Champagne he hid in the snow, the few presents next to the tree trunk. There were pillows too, which he arranged neatly. Then, quickly checking that Bam was nowhere insight, he ran over to the store across the street from the park - which was owned by a friend of his father, who also owned the land they were sitting on - and picked up the thermos of mulled wine he’d left there. Finally, everything was ready, and it had just started snowing when Bam walked up to him, his boots crunching in the snow. He shook his head in amazement.
“You are too much.” Ville shrugged and smiled.
“Sit down!”
“Ville its fucking freezing out here! You must be crazy!”
“I have blankets. Actually, I have a lot of blankets. And mulled wine and some food and… Merry Christmas,” he said. Bam grinned at him.
“I wish I had a camera…”
“Oh. I have one of those too.”
“Are you serious?” Ville nodded. “God, I love you,” was all that Bam could say.
“Love you too. Now sit down before this wine gets cold.” Bam sat down next to him, and laid his head back on the pillows. He was now looking directly up through the branches of the tree. The lights sparkled through the pines and reflected off of the shiny balls, little prisms of gold and red light danced down the trunk, and the air smelt of sap, wine, snow, and Ville.
“This is beautiful,” Bam said.
“I know. Jesse and I used to come out here every year, and just sit under this tree and look up through the branches for hours. Our dad took us when we were small, and then we started doing it alone.” Bam looked over at Ville.
“You didn’t want to do it with him this year too?” Ville shrugged and shook his head.
“I’d rather be doing it with you.” Bam smiled at him and kissed his almost blue lips.
“You’re freezing!” Bam exclaimed.
“No… I’m used to it.”
“Whatever, come here.” Bam wrapped him in his blanket and pulled him close. They sat quietly, looking up through the branches for a while. It was actually snowing quite heavily, but they were completely underneath the branches, and they didn’t get any snow on them at all.
“How old is this tree?” Bam asked - for it wasn’t just a tree that they brought every year, it was there year in and year out. Ville shrugged.
“Old. It’s been here forever. They always use the same decorations on it now; but they used to have multi-colored lights on it. Apparently that’s how I learned my colors - Dad would bring me out here and teach me with the lights.”
“That’s cute.” He could just see it, Ville and his dad laying out here in the snow, and baby Ville getting the green lights confused with the red. His stomach rumbled, interrupting the reminiscing. Ville laughed.
“Here. I have some food.” He sat up and pulled some cakes and other delicious treats out of his bag - all of them Finnish specialties. “I thought since you’re going back to American cuisine, you might as well stock up on the Finnish for until you get back.” Bam smiled, sitting up too, digging into the treats. They talked and laughed for a while, sipping on the warm wine and eating the delicious food. Ville took an annoying amount of pictures, leaving Bam with what seemed like permanent flash marks in his eyes.
“Right. Presents,” said Bam, after they’d finished. He sat his mug down on the table, and pulled his backpack up. “God, I feel unprepared after all of this. You always manage to outdo me… god.” He smiled, pulling out several packages from his bag. Ville laughed, and crawled through the snow to get the packages he’d brought. They exchanged them - Bam looked at Ville.
“You first.” Ville smiled and opened the first package, pulling out … a padded thong.
“What?!” Bam laughed.
“That, my dear friend, is so that you don’t damage yourself in those damn pants, but can still look as sexy as ever without underwear lines.” Ville stared at the thong in amazement, but then he started laughing so much that his sides hurt.
“Oh my god, Bam, that’s hilarious.”
“Yeah… you don’t actually have to wear it; I just wanted to see your face.”
“Oh, believe me darling, I will be wearing this…” Ville grinned at him. “Your turn.” Bam opened his first present carefully, and then stared at it, smiling in disbelief.
“Where’d you get this?”
“I asked around…” It was a picture someone had taken at Bam’s birthday party. It was black and white; they were facing each other, looking deep into each other’s eyes, apparently. Between them, the new skateboard lay on the table, surrounded by its wrappings. And there inside the heartagram, caught perfectly in the light, were those three elaborately curled words: ‘Minä rakastan sinua’.
“It’s beautiful. Thank you.” Ville shrugged, smiling.
“I have a copy too. I just thought it was such a great picture…”
“It is. Thank you.” Bam reached over to kiss him. “Okay. Your turn again.” This time, Ville pulled out a scarf from the wrappings.
“I saw it and it just reminded me of you… I know that your old scarf is your mom’s, but it doesn’t really do much against the cold… so I got you this.” It was a black scarf, with an intricate, deep blood red pattern stitched all over it, and gold threads pulled through it. Ville loved it. He smiled and immediately swapped it with the thin blue one.
“It’s beautiful. Thank you. Go again.” Bam grinned and started opening the next package. It had a box in it - which was covered in writing; when he turned it over to see the picture on the front, he stared.
“Ville?!”
“Okay, ignore the picture. It’s like, the most amazing massage machine ever.”
“Did you get this from your dad’s shop?” Bam asked, eyeing the box suspiciously.
“Maybe.”
“You did… kinky, giving me sex toys for Christmas.”
“I told you, it’s this like, massage machine. You’re always so fucking tense - this thing does wonders. Trust me.”
“I know, I’m just kidding with you. I can’t wait to try that.” Ville grinned at him. His next present was a new makeup bag - he’d been complaining about having to buy a new one for weeks, since Bam had wrecked his other one by pulling the zip too hard. It was black leather, but Bam had painstakingly drawn a golden heartagram on it with fabric pens. Ville undid the zip, and found what seemed to be a lifetime supply of black eyeliner inside.
“Jesus, Bam, how much did that cost you?” Ville looked up at him in amazement.
“Not much, April’s friends sent it from the states; they get it cheap since they work in a beauty parlor… But whatever. Now you never have an excuse not to wear it, okay?” Ville grinned and nodded, and then passed Bam his last and most important present. Bam poked it.
“It’s squishy!” Ville laughed, watching him as he unwrapped it. He pulled out a long black jacket, made of the same fabric that Ville’s own very warm coat was.
“It’s the warmest fabric ever. It looks thin but it keeps you toasty.” Bam looked at the jacket in the flickering light. It was covered in writing, intricate designs, some small pictures. Looking closer at the writing, he saw the lyrics from the songs that Ville would sing to him, both the ones that he’d made up himself and ones that they both loved, or which had a special meaning for them. There were phrases that they said, and there were heartagrams all over.
“Oh my god, Ville! It’s amazing. It’s going to take me hours to read all this…”
“Look in the pockets!” Ville said, grinning. Bam, still amazed, dug around in the big pockets. In the first one he found a handful of his favorite Finnish chocolate, Tupla, which came wrapped in elegant black paper with red writing, and which Bam liked to look at just as much as he liked to eat. The next one had a tape in it.
“What’s this?”
“It’s got all the songs on it that are on the jacket,” Ville said. “And a few extra.” Bam smiled. “And the next pocket, Bam.”
“There isn’t one!”
“Yes there is, it’s on the inside.” Bam found it, and pulled out what looked like a rosary chain, but on the end, instead of a cross, there hung a heartagram.
“What… where’d you get this?”
“I got someone to make it for me,” Ville said.
“It’s beautiful…” Bam put it around his neck and let the heartagram fall on his chest. He smiled.
“Thank you.”
“You’re very welcome.”
“Here. Last present.”
“There’s another one?”
“Of course.” He passed Ville a long, thin box. Ville opened it carefully. Inside there was a black case with a silver clasp, and the words ‘Minä Rakastan Sinua’ written on the top with silver. Ville undid the clasp and pulled out a silver microphone. On the base, it had an inscription: “To My Willa Walo - So That Whenever You Sing You’ll Be Singing To Me. -Bam, 2000.” Ville stared at it.
“I know… you already have one… but I couldn’t think of anything else and I thought you might want to save the other one, cuz its Jesse’s and all that… and…”
“Bam… I…” Ville was lost for words. He turned the microphone over in his hands, lightly tracing the lettering with his thumb. “. . . wow.”
“You like it?” Bam asked, tentatively.
“I love it… its beautiful…”
“It’s just a microphone…”
“But… it’s the most amazing present I’ve ever had…” Ville smiled at Bam.
“So now you have to sing! Because you have to use it or I’ll be offended.” Bam nodded, winking at him. Ville shook his head slightly.
“… I guess I will, won’t I?” Bam grinned.
“Do you mean … you’ll try?”
“Do you really, really want me to?”
“I want you to do what will make you happy, Ville… but I think that will make you happy.” Ville looked at the microphone in his hands. It was the perfect weight, the perfect size; the whole thing just felt completely right. He nodded slowly.
“I… I guess so…” Bam grinned. Ville put the microphone carefully back in its box, reaching back into the snow to find the bottle of champagne. Bam stared at him.
“Serious?”
“Of course. Hey, what’s the point in being 18 if you can’t buy expensive alcohol?” Bam laughed. They popped the cork together, managing to somehow not get completely covered in the overflow.
“Merry Christmas,” Ville said, raising his mug - which they’d cleaned out with snow.
“Merry Christmas.” They clinked their mugs together and drank. After the bottle was empty, they kissed for a little while, just simple, sweet kisses. No need, no demand, just pure affection. After awhile though, even the multitude of thick blankets wasn’t keeping out the cold. Bam was shivering heavily now, and even Ville was feeling the cold.
“I guess we’d better go, huh?” Ville said. They were laying down again, peering up through the labyrinth of branches. Bam sighed.
“I don’t want to… but I guess so…” Ville made Bam stand up and started packing everything up. Bam clutched onto his new coat, having put everything else in his bag. Once Ville had packed everything up, Ville opened the door of his Dad’s friend’s shop with the key that he’d borrowed, put his bag inside the door, and locked it again. He put his hand in Bam’s glove again, and they walked slowly home. Ville was secretly dreading leaving Bam at his door, but as they stood outside kissing goodbye, Bam stopped and looked at him.
“Do you want to spend the night? I mean, we’re leaving at like, 8, but you can always let yourself out… I’ll give you a key…” Ville’s smile meant yes. It was surprisingly early - only 9 o’clock. Bam thought that they had been under that tree for ages.
“Boys! You two look frozen through! What have you been doing?” April looked up in surprise from the sink, where she was finishing up the dishes.
“We had a picnic,” Bam said, grinning, sliding his and Ville’s hands out of the glove.
“You what? Brandon, its like, -20 degrees out there. Fahrenheit! Are you two crazy?!” They nodded, smiling.
“But Mom, Mom, look what Ville gave me!” Bam lifted up the jacket. April took it and looked it all over in wonder.
“Ville, dear, that’s beautiful. How long did that take you?” Ville shrugged.
“I don’t know… a while. Doesn’t matter… I enjoyed it.” April smiled at him, and handed the coat back to Bam. “Have you tried it on yet dear?” Bam shook his head, and quickly took his coat off. The jacket fitted him perfectly. Ville stood back to admire him.
“Perfect,” said April. Bam nodded, craning his neck to see the back.
“How’s it make my butt look, Ville?” he asked. Ville laughed.
“Turn around,” he said. Bam obeyed. “Sexy,” he chuckled. April laughed at them.
“Do you boys want something to eat?” They nodded simultaneously. Bam pulled off the jacket carefully, and placed it on the bench. April heated up the leftovers from the meal that she was still cleaning up from, and then left them to eat it alone. When she came in once to get a drink for Phil, Bam was feeding Ville from his fork. She smiled and hurried out of the room. After they were done eating, Bam had to pack his things, so they escaped up to his room.
“Bam!” April called after him.
“Yeah?”
“Is Ville spending the night?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay… he knows we’re leaving early, right?”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s okay. I’ll give him my key.”
“Great. You’re going to get packed now, right?”
“Yeah, yeah. Ape, quit worrying!”
“Sorry…”
“Ville’s spending the night?” Phil asked when April came back in the room.
“Yeah. Why?”
“In the same bed?”
“Um, well, Bam only owns one bed…”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“Phil. Jesus. Do they look like kids who are going to go … doing… that?”
“I don’t know.”
“Phil, they’ve been spending the night together for ages. I really don’t think there’s anything to worry about. Anyways. Bam can take care of himself.” Phil shrugged. He didn’t like it. And he still didn’t like it when he went upstairs and heard faint moaning coming out of Bam’s bedroom. What scared him even more was when Jess opened the door of Bam’s room and walked out of it, grinning. He saw his dad staring at him and stopped.
“What?”
“What are they doing in there?”
“What? Oh, that? Oh. Bam got this massage machine as a Christmas present… it’s the most amazing thing in the world. You have to try it. What? You looked so relieved…”
“Yeah… well… I heard moaning and … I thought…” Jess laughed.
“Phil! You think Bam and Ville would… are you serious? They wouldn’t … no! You have to be kidding me; you thought they were actually… hahahha that’s hilarious.” Jess just shook his head. “Quit worrying about it Phil. They’re good kids. I can’t believe you thought they were… hehehee…” Jess rolled his eyes and disappeared into his bedroom. Phil timidly knocked on the door.
“Yeah?”
“Bam? Can I come in?”
“Sure.” Phil went in to find Bam sitting behind Ville, holding an odd looking electrical appliance in his hand. “Phil, this thing is like, amazing, you have got to try it. Watch what it does.” Bam turned it on and put it on Ville’s shoulder - Ville’s back automatically stretched out and the muscles shook a little as it kneaded all the tenseness and stress out of his joints. Bam switched it off; Ville shuddered.
“God. That’s good…” Phil laughed. Bam motioned to the bed next to him.
“C’mere. You got to try this.” Phil did as he was bidden - when Bam turned the machine on and put it on his back, he thought he had never felt anything that good before. Bam laughed and turned it off.
“That’s amazing,” Phil said. “Who gave you it?”
“Ville did.”
“Great gift. I’ll be stealing that from him. Okay… I just wanted to say, you know, Bam should go to sleep soon because we have to leave early…”
“I know Phil.”
“Right. Okay. Good night.” Phil left them, and closed the door behind him. He was still a little disturbed, but, really, if he thought about it, Ville was a nice boy. But he was a boy. Shuddering, Phil crossed to his and April’s room and fell into bed.
“Phil, just don’t think about Ville as another boy,” April said without even looking up from her book. “I’m pretty sure Bam doesn’t either.”
“But he is.” April shrugged.
“He’s quite feminine, you know. At least Bam’s not the ‘girl’ of the couple.”
“April. My son is gay. Just let me be shocked.”
“Do you really think Bam is gay?” April was looking at him now.
“Well, he’s dating a boy! That means he’s gay.”
“What if it’s just a one off thing?”
“He’s dating another boy right now. That makes him gay right now. April, it’s okay, it’s just… weird.” April patted his shoulder.
“You’ll get over it.”
“How did you deal with it? Don’t you think it’s weird?” April shrugged.
“Sure. But I can also see that that boy makes Bam happy. And if he’s happy, he’s not angry at me and you for moving him.”
“Right.”
“Just ignore it Phil. He’ll get over it soon enough. High school romances never last.”
Bam and Ville stayed up talking until the small hours of the morning. Bam had actually lost count of how many times he’d said “goodnight, I’m going to sleep,” because one of them would always say something and bring up another topic. When 7 o’clock rolled around, they’d been asleep for about 2 hours. Ville was, once again, wearing Bam’s boxers, and they had fallen asleep with their arms wrapped around each other. April came in the room and saw them laying with their faces turned towards each other, breathing softly. She almost felt guilty waking them, but she didn’t want to be late for the plane.
“Bam, Bam darling, come on. Wake up.” Bam’s eyes opened slowly, and he carefully disentangled himself from Ville. “Hurry, finish packing, get dressed, and let’s go. We’re going to be late.” She left the room and Bam got up quietly, rushing around to find all of his clothes and finish putting things in his suitcase. He had just finished zipping his suitcase and was stuffing the remnants of the jelly bread April had passed him through the door when Ville started moving his arms and legs and moaning a little.
“Bam?” Bam looked over from where he was standing by the door with his suitcase in hand. He was wearing the jacket Ville had given him the day before, ready to leave. “You weren’t just going to leave, were you?”
“I didn’t want to wake you up,” Bam said, crossing the room to sit on the bed.
“Bam, come on, let’s go!” Jess called from downstairs.
“You have to go right now?” Bam nodded. “Wait. 10 seconds.” Ville got up and dug around in his pile of clothes.
“Here.” He handed Bam the dark blue scarf that he always wore; his lucky scarf; the one his mom gave him.
“What? Ville, I can’t take this.”
“Yes you can. And you will. Just for now. For luck.”
“Why will I need luck?”
“I just have the feeling you will. Just wear it.”
“What about you?”
“I have the one you gave me, remember?”
“Oh. Okay…” They looked at each other for a little, but were interrupted by Jess again.
“Bam! Hurry up!”
“You better go.”
“Yeah. Here’s the key. You don’t need to leave right away… sleep for a while.”
“I will.” Bam wrapped his arms around Ville’s neck and kissed him.
“Bye,” he said.
“Bye Bammie. Merry Christmas… I’ll miss you…”
“I’ll miss you too. Merry Christmas.” After one last sweet kiss, Bam was running down the stairs and Ville was watching him climb into the taxi through the window, listening to their laughter before the door slammed shut, and he sat staring after them still in the silence after the taxi’s roaring engine faded away into nothing.
ah to hell with it. *grins* sorry for keeping you waiting... i was inunduated with birthday parties and making birthday presents (marie, you better damn well LOVE this present, it's taking me DAYS! ;) *kisses*) and then an EVIL ass math project at the last minute... but i'm here now, bearing gifts - 2 very long, uber cute chapters to make up for lost time. Sound good? Good.
So, you know the deal. Don't know em, don't own em, and this never happened. I do, however, own the storyline and I own Anna's character. If you steal any of my work, there will be no more vam cookies for you EVER and i will set a very hungry Raab loose on you. *nods resolutely*
Links
Archive 1-25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
There was one week of school left before they got let out for Christmas break. Bam was going back to West Chester for Christmas; and it just so happened that they’d be getting back on exactly the same day as when they arrived in Finland for the first time. Bam sat in all his classes, staring at the wall, thinking about this. Had it really already been a year? So much had happened. When school let out, he ran to Ville’s locker, to catch him before he disappeared to go find Jesse.
“Ville!” Ville turned around.
“Yeah?”
“Um… what are you doing? Like, right now?”
“I was going to go home; Jesse and I have a PlayStation tournament that we never quite finished 4 years ago… and we’re going to finish it now. Why?”
“Oh… um, never mind. I’ll see you later then.”
“No, wait, Bam. What did you want?” Ville’s hand was on Bam’s arm, pulling him towards himself.
“I dunno… just wanted to see if you wanted to go into town… they have all the lights up and its snowing and its all nice… but if you’re busy its okay.”
“No. Come on lets go. I’ll call Jesse, tell him we’ll do it later.” Bam smiled and threw his arms around Ville’s neck. Anna passed them on her way out and laughed; they were literally eating each other’s faces.
“Get a room!” she yelled at them. Bam started laughing in the middle of the kiss, and so they gave up. Bam had to put all the appropriate layers on before he could venture outside - Ville watched him pile on sweaters and coats and mittens and scarves amusedly, sticking his own arm through a single, but very warm long black jacket, pulling on a pair of mittens and a scarf, and of course the beanie which he just wore all the time anyways.
“You look like the Michelin tire man, Bam,” he said, giggling. Bam swatted him away.
“It’s fucking cold in this country, okay? And I thought it got cold in Philly… god…” Ville laughed, taking his gloved hand in his own.
“Come on Michelin Man… lets go.” Bam glared at him; they had to run to catch the bus into town, but they made it. Anna was on it too, so they swung into the empty seat next to her. Bam put Ville on his lap, wrapping his arms around his waist.
“Hello,” she said, rolling her eyes at them. “You two look happy.”
“It’s snowing!” said Bam energetically.
“Yes… well… this is Finland. It does that a lot here Bam.”
“Yeah but… its snowing!” Anna looked at Ville.
“What did you do to him?” Ville shrugged.
“I’m not sure. He’s just happy.” Anna laughed.
“Hey Anna. Guess who’s coming home tonight,” Bam said, poking her. She looked at him with wide eyes.
“Really? He never told me!”
“Yeah, well he wanted to surprise you but I know you’re pissed off at him so I decided to tell you so that you can surprise him. He was bitching on the phone ALL last night about how much he missed you. God I almost went crazy.” Ville and Anna laughed. “Did you know that in 2 and a half weeks I will have been here for a whole year?”
“Really?” said Ville, looking down at him. Bam nodded. The bus stopped in the middle of town and they piled out into the freezing air. Bam shivered; Ville wrapped his arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer.
“Yeah, that’s about right,” says Anna. “Wait, are you going home for Christmas?” Bam nodded.
“What? You are?” Ville let his arm slide from Bam’s shoulders.
“Uh… yeah…”
“Were you planning on telling me anytime soon or were you just going to leave and let me figure it out by myself?”
“Oh, I was going to tell you today. But I forgot.” Bam put an arm around Ville’s waist. “Don’t be mad.”
“I’m not… but there go my plans for Christmas…”
“Oh… I’m sorry…” Anna laughed.
“You two are so soppy it’s ridiculous,” she said. Bam punched her with his free arm.
“Shut up. I’ve heard you and Jess being soppy too. You can’t talk.” Anna laughed.
“Okay, okay. But I still think you guys are funny.”
“Why?” asked Ville.
“Because… you are. You’re so cute. And I remember… a year ago you hated each other. Bam was even mad at you for saving him from that fight because he just didn’t like you.” They both laughed, and then looked at each other.
“You were mad at me for saving you?” Ville asked. Bam shrugged.
“You were a fucking asshole back then.”
“Thank you.”
“But you’re not anymore.”
“Good.”
“I love you,” Bam said, trying to keep it to a whisper, but Anna heard him, and promptly burst out into laughter. Bam blushed, but Ville just kissed him and told him that he loved him too, and then raised his voice and told him to “ignore that whore, she’s not worth it,” which earned him a slap from the “whore”. Eventually, she had to leave them to go up to her apartment. Bam let go of Ville’s waist to hug her, she gave Ville a short kiss on the cheek like a true European, and then bounded down the alley, pulling out the iPod that she had saved up for for months. Bam shook his head as he watched her disappear around another snow covered corner. Ville started walking, and Bam ran to catch up with him, sliding his arm around his waist again.
“She’s great,” said Ville quietly.
“She is.”
“Does she still hate me?” Ville asked him seriously. Bam shook his head.
“Are you kidding? Anna doesn’t hold grudges if people apologize. She doesn’t hate you at all. I don’t think she ever did - you just really, really hurt her.” Bam shrugged. “But its okay now. She loves you very much, I think; she loves all her friends with her whole heart.”
“She is amazing.” Ville shook his head. “So what do you wanna do?”
“I dunno… let’s go to that Christmas market thing… I need to buy people presents.” So they headed to the market place, where there were rows and rows of booths set up, covered in snow and lights, and chock full of knick knacks. The vendors huddled next to their electric heaters, wearing more layers than Bam and clutching blue mugs of hot mulled wine in gloved hands, their fingers sticking out of them like little white-blue sausages. Christmas songs, both those familiar to Bam and traditional Finnish ones, seemed to be floating in the air, and the whole thing was magical. Bam broke out in a huge smile as they walked through the tight rows, looking through all the hundreds of things that were on offer; they picked some up to examine, laughed at some, cooed over others. Ville had slipped one of his gloves off and squeezed his hand inside Bam’s, and then put both of their hands in his coat pocket. Bam bought presents for his whole family and the rest of their friends, Ville’s family, and saw several things which would do for Ville’s present. When he started shivering, Ville pulled him into a little heated hut on the side of the market and placed a large cup of mulled wine in his blue hands. It had been dark outside for a few hours, but now it was really getting dark, and very cold.
“You done shopping?” Ville asked.
“Just about. I dunno what to get you… you’re impossible to shop for.” Ville chuckled.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll love anything you get me.”
“I know, but it has to be perfect.” Bam nodded resolutely, sipping the scalding wine. Ville smiled, and brushed a lock of hair from Bam’s face.
“Wanna go out to dinner?” Ville asked. Bam shook his head.
“I can’t. April’s made this amazing cake and like, I need to eat it. Before Phil gets to it. And Jess is coming home and we’re supposed to start packing, because we need to do ‘smart packing’ because we’re going to be bringing so much stuff back… because April’s going crazy because she can’t get anything she needs here. We’re taking like, 4 empty suitcases. It’s crazy.” Ville chuckled.
“I can’t believe you’re leaving me at Christmas!” he said.
“Sorry… I’d love to stay with you… but I’m going home, Ville! Home! For like, the first time in a year.” He said this smiling, almost bouncing on his stool. Ville tried to smile, but he felt kind of uncomfortable. He resented Bam’s attachment to Philadelphia. It made him feel like he wasn’t good enough, like they all weren’t good enough to make him happy. He didn’t understand how anyone could want to be anywhere besides Finland. But then again, he couldn’t imagine how painful it would be to leave, and so he didn’t know what Bam was going through.
“I’m glad you’re going home, but… I’m going to miss you.” Bam sighed.
“I’ll miss you too. Come on, why don’t you come over for dinner? April’s been saying that she hasn’t seen you for a while, and she misses feeding you, because we don’t compliment her as much as you do, and her ego needs a boost.” Ville thought this over. Dinner with Bam, or going home to Jesse, it was difficult. But Bam was pouting at him with his adorable blue eyes and perfect pink lips and he just couldn’t resist.
“Okay. April’s cakes are amazing…” Bam smiled. They finished their wine and then ventured out into the blistering cold. The wind had started blowing now, and they cuddled up against it as they walked to Bam’s house. Bam had forgotten his keys, so they rang the doorbell. Phil opened the door and they rushed in the house, still clinging to each other, with rosy cheeks and bright eyes. Phil frowned - but he put it down as a Finnish thing and tried to ignore it as they ran up the stairs hand in hand. Bam pulled the door shut behind them and fell to the floor in laughter. Ville was taking his coat off carefully.
“What’s so damn funny?”
“Did you not see Phil’s face?”
“No… why?”
“He looked like the sky had just fallen on his head!”
“What? Why? Wait… Bam… you did tell him, right?” Bam shook his head, still laughing. “Bam. You naughty boy.”
“Yeah baby, you know you like it.” Ville raised an eyebrow at him, throwing his neatly folded coat on the bed.”
“Brandon, you know I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Don’t call me that!”
“Call you what, Brandon?”
“That!”
“Whatever, Brandon.”
“Ville!!!!”
“Yes, Brandon?” Ville’s eyes twinkled with laughter.
“Fine, Hermanni.” Ville’s eyes narrowed. Bam smiled innocently - and then received a pillow full in the face. Bam was on his feet in seconds, tackling his boyfriend into the bed and commencing to tickle him until he was screaming.
“You asked for it!” Bam said, continuing to tickle him. Ville squirmed helplessly, screaming and laughing. Bam took mercy when Ville started gasping for breath; and kissed him instead. They were rolling around on the bed, lips locked and Ville still trying to get revenge on Bam, when Phil opened the door to call them to dinner. He stopped dead in his tracks, watching his son roll around on a bed with another man’s son. Without saying anything, he left, thoughts whirling around in his head. He sat down at the table, staring at his plate without really seeing it.
“Phil? Did you call them?” Phil shook his head. “What’s wrong?”
“I just… they’re… he’s… what’s going on?!” April was confused for a second before she heard Ville’s voice upstairs.
“Ooohhh… you mean that?”
“What?”
“Bam and Ville.”
“Yeah! April… they’re… cavorting on Bam’s bed!” April shrugged.
“Well. I guess that’s what couples do nowadays.”
“Couples?!”
“Phil, Bam and Ville have been dating for 5 months. Haven’t you noticed?”
“5 months?! Dating?! What?! My son is gay?!” Jess walked in the room at this moment.
“Yeah… didn’t you know Dad?”
“Uh, no! Thank you everyone for telling me!” April shrugged.
“I thought it was fairly obvious; he said he was going to tell you, anyways.”
“Well he didn’t. I’m not sure whether to be angry, or just keep being very disturbed.”
“Don’t be either,” said April. “He doesn’t need either of those. What he needs is for you to be supportive.”
“So I’m supposed to be supportive of his choice, which goes against all of my morals?”
“Yes. Because you’re his father.”
“Anyways, nothing you say is going to make Bam give Ville up. He cares about him too much,” said Jess, shrugging. Phil sighed.
“Jess, call them down, they’re going to starve.”
“It didn’t look to me like they cared much about food,” said Phil.
“Oh, leave them alone. I think they’re cute together,” said April.
“Yeah… so cute it’s going to make me gag.”
“Oh, shut up. You’re just boring. Be happy that he’s finally found something to make him happy!” Jess called them down, and they came bouncing down the stairs, still laughing and red cheeked.
“Did you boys have a nice time in town?” asked April.
“Yeah. We went to the Christmas market, went Christmas shopping,” Bam said, sliding into the bench, pulling Ville after him. “It was freezing cold though.” Ville rolled his eyes.
“It is not that cold, Bam.”
“It is!”
“Whatever.” April smiled at them and started serving the dinner. They ate quite quickly and relatively quietly, most of the conversation flowing between Bam and Jess. Phil didn’t say anything, just watched them discreetly. April cleared away the plates and gave them all a piece of cake. Ville thought that he could live off of April’s cakes and never say a single word in complaint. When he was done with his own piece of cake, Phil cleared his throat and looked at Bam and Ville, who were now giggling and whispering to each other.
“So… you boys are … an item?” They looked over at him, a little shocked. Bam nodded. Phil took a deep breath.
“Bam… why didn’t you tell me before?” Jess and April had quietly slipped away.
“I forgot… I meant to, but it slipped my mind. What with Jesse and all that.” Phil frowned.
“Bam, you know that this goes against all of my … I dunno, morals, ideas, what have you. But … I trust that you’re making the right decision for yourself.” Bam nodded - Ville had slipped his hand into Bam’s and Bam was glad of its light pressure. Phil sighed.
“Ville… you’re going to look after my son, right?”
“I’m doing the best I can, sir.”
“Don’t call me sir. I’m not that old.” He looked between them. “Well, if it makes you guys happy, then - good luck.” He smiled despite himself. “Ville… I imagine your parents know already, right?” Ville nodded. “And they’re okay with it.”
“Yes.”
“Right. Well then. I guess… that’s that.” He nodded to them, stood up, and left them alone. Once he was out of hearing range, Bam turned to Ville.
“He hates it,” he said. Ville sighed and put his arms around Bam.
“But he’s trying to be supportive… give him points for that.” Bam shrugged.
“He has no choice - he knows I wouldn’t listen to him anyways.”
“Just give him a chance, he’ll come round. No-one can resist my charm!” Bam laughed, cuddling into him.
“Thank you.”
“No problem. I’d better go now; I might freeze my ass off walking home.”
“That would be horrible!”
“I know.” Ville ran upstairs to get his things, coming back to find Bam leaning his head on the table. “Don’t worry about it Bam. It’ll be fine.”
“I know.”
“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you.”
“Love you too.” Bam kissed Ville goodbye, and locked the door behind him. He found his parents in the living room.
“Phil?”
“Yes son?”
“I’m sorry…”
“What for?”
“I dunno… this whole thing…”
“Why?”
“Because… I know you… expected something else from me.”
“Bam, it doesn’t matter what I expected. Honestly. What matters is that you’re doing what’s right for you.”
“All we care about is that you’re happy Bam, you know that,” April said quietly. Bam nodded.
“Are you happy with him?” Phil asked.
“Yes,” Bam said, after a small pause.
“Well then. Don’t worry. We’re right behind you,” Phil said. April nodded in agreement.
“Thanks.” Bam smiled at them and then turned and ran up stairs.
Chapter 30
The last week of school passed quickly. It was, of course, freezing outside, so Bam didn’t do much besides sit around in his house. Ville had, for the rest of the week, been with Jesse after school. However, on Friday, Ville managed to get Bam’s attention while he was in Biology and they went off to the bathroom together, just like they had done a month or two ago.
“What’s up?” Bam asked, as Ville lead him into a stall.
“Nothing… I wanted to kiss my boyfriend,” Ville said. Bam smiled, and opened his lips to Ville.
“What are you doing tonight?” Ville asked him.
“Um… packing.”
“No you’re not.”
“I’m not?”
“No. You’re coming out with me and we’re going to go get drunk.”
“No… dude I couldn’t handle a 10 hour plane ride with a hang over.”
“Fine then. We’re going out, and I’ll get drunk. Or I won’t. Whatever. But we’ve got to because I have to give you your presents and … you’re going to be gone for a whole week and a half!”
“No… 2 weeks. I’m missing some school.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah…”
“Oh my god I’m going to die.”
“You’ll be fine.”
“That’s what you think.”
“Whatever Ville. Okay, so we’re going out tonight.” Ville nodded. “Anyone else coming?”
“I dunno… I guess if they want… but I want some time alone with you Bammie.”
“Okay.” They kissed quickly, and then Bam ran back to class so that no-one got too suspicious.
They had all walked out of the school doors in a big, happy group of people. Jess had been waiting for Anna, and she’d run up to him and pounced on him. They smiled at each other all the way to the bus stop. The bus took the big and very loud group to the center of town, where they all got out and headed to Mc Donald’s for nourishment. After burning part of a table, leaving several new spit balls on the ceiling and making one of the cleaners cry, the rowdy group of friends walked out of Mc Donald’s and took to the cold streets. Someone found an alleyway sheltered from the wind, and they all sat down. Their laughter could be heard for blocks. After a while, the couples - namely Anna and Jess, Ville and Bam, Linde and some girl who Bam had never really noticed before but who was actually really pretty - stood up one by one and left everyone else to their booze. Ville steered Bam away from the main center of the town to a park just a few blocks away. It was completely covered in snow, and there was a giant Christmas tree in the middle, decorated with simple white fairy lights and red and gold balls. Ville pulled several blankets out of his bag - he had brought Jesse’s large sports bag to school instead of his East Pack so that he could carry all the things he needed. Bam watched him pull out a tarp in amazement.
“What is this?” he asked. Ville smiled.
“We’re having Christmas right now. This is what I was gonna do on Christmas… but you’re not here.”
“What are we doing?”
“You’ll see. Do me a favor? Go take a walk around the block and come back in 5 minutes so I can set this up?” Bam rolled his eyes at him, but obeyed. After he set up the oil lantern so that he could see, Ville spread the tarp out right underneath the huge tree’s low branches, over the deep snow. He dug around in the snow for rocks, and placed them on the edges of the tarp. Then he put one blanket down on the tarp. He pulled out the little collapsible table that his mom had used when she was bedridden, some candlestick holders and tall, deep red candles. Champagne he hid in the snow, the few presents next to the tree trunk. There were pillows too, which he arranged neatly. Then, quickly checking that Bam was nowhere insight, he ran over to the store across the street from the park - which was owned by a friend of his father, who also owned the land they were sitting on - and picked up the thermos of mulled wine he’d left there. Finally, everything was ready, and it had just started snowing when Bam walked up to him, his boots crunching in the snow. He shook his head in amazement.
“You are too much.” Ville shrugged and smiled.
“Sit down!”
“Ville its fucking freezing out here! You must be crazy!”
“I have blankets. Actually, I have a lot of blankets. And mulled wine and some food and… Merry Christmas,” he said. Bam grinned at him.
“I wish I had a camera…”
“Oh. I have one of those too.”
“Are you serious?” Ville nodded. “God, I love you,” was all that Bam could say.
“Love you too. Now sit down before this wine gets cold.” Bam sat down next to him, and laid his head back on the pillows. He was now looking directly up through the branches of the tree. The lights sparkled through the pines and reflected off of the shiny balls, little prisms of gold and red light danced down the trunk, and the air smelt of sap, wine, snow, and Ville.
“This is beautiful,” Bam said.
“I know. Jesse and I used to come out here every year, and just sit under this tree and look up through the branches for hours. Our dad took us when we were small, and then we started doing it alone.” Bam looked over at Ville.
“You didn’t want to do it with him this year too?” Ville shrugged and shook his head.
“I’d rather be doing it with you.” Bam smiled at him and kissed his almost blue lips.
“You’re freezing!” Bam exclaimed.
“No… I’m used to it.”
“Whatever, come here.” Bam wrapped him in his blanket and pulled him close. They sat quietly, looking up through the branches for a while. It was actually snowing quite heavily, but they were completely underneath the branches, and they didn’t get any snow on them at all.
“How old is this tree?” Bam asked - for it wasn’t just a tree that they brought every year, it was there year in and year out. Ville shrugged.
“Old. It’s been here forever. They always use the same decorations on it now; but they used to have multi-colored lights on it. Apparently that’s how I learned my colors - Dad would bring me out here and teach me with the lights.”
“That’s cute.” He could just see it, Ville and his dad laying out here in the snow, and baby Ville getting the green lights confused with the red. His stomach rumbled, interrupting the reminiscing. Ville laughed.
“Here. I have some food.” He sat up and pulled some cakes and other delicious treats out of his bag - all of them Finnish specialties. “I thought since you’re going back to American cuisine, you might as well stock up on the Finnish for until you get back.” Bam smiled, sitting up too, digging into the treats. They talked and laughed for a while, sipping on the warm wine and eating the delicious food. Ville took an annoying amount of pictures, leaving Bam with what seemed like permanent flash marks in his eyes.
“Right. Presents,” said Bam, after they’d finished. He sat his mug down on the table, and pulled his backpack up. “God, I feel unprepared after all of this. You always manage to outdo me… god.” He smiled, pulling out several packages from his bag. Ville laughed, and crawled through the snow to get the packages he’d brought. They exchanged them - Bam looked at Ville.
“You first.” Ville smiled and opened the first package, pulling out … a padded thong.
“What?!” Bam laughed.
“That, my dear friend, is so that you don’t damage yourself in those damn pants, but can still look as sexy as ever without underwear lines.” Ville stared at the thong in amazement, but then he started laughing so much that his sides hurt.
“Oh my god, Bam, that’s hilarious.”
“Yeah… you don’t actually have to wear it; I just wanted to see your face.”
“Oh, believe me darling, I will be wearing this…” Ville grinned at him. “Your turn.” Bam opened his first present carefully, and then stared at it, smiling in disbelief.
“Where’d you get this?”
“I asked around…” It was a picture someone had taken at Bam’s birthday party. It was black and white; they were facing each other, looking deep into each other’s eyes, apparently. Between them, the new skateboard lay on the table, surrounded by its wrappings. And there inside the heartagram, caught perfectly in the light, were those three elaborately curled words: ‘Minä rakastan sinua’.
“It’s beautiful. Thank you.” Ville shrugged, smiling.
“I have a copy too. I just thought it was such a great picture…”
“It is. Thank you.” Bam reached over to kiss him. “Okay. Your turn again.” This time, Ville pulled out a scarf from the wrappings.
“I saw it and it just reminded me of you… I know that your old scarf is your mom’s, but it doesn’t really do much against the cold… so I got you this.” It was a black scarf, with an intricate, deep blood red pattern stitched all over it, and gold threads pulled through it. Ville loved it. He smiled and immediately swapped it with the thin blue one.
“It’s beautiful. Thank you. Go again.” Bam grinned and started opening the next package. It had a box in it - which was covered in writing; when he turned it over to see the picture on the front, he stared.
“Ville?!”
“Okay, ignore the picture. It’s like, the most amazing massage machine ever.”
“Did you get this from your dad’s shop?” Bam asked, eyeing the box suspiciously.
“Maybe.”
“You did… kinky, giving me sex toys for Christmas.”
“I told you, it’s this like, massage machine. You’re always so fucking tense - this thing does wonders. Trust me.”
“I know, I’m just kidding with you. I can’t wait to try that.” Ville grinned at him. His next present was a new makeup bag - he’d been complaining about having to buy a new one for weeks, since Bam had wrecked his other one by pulling the zip too hard. It was black leather, but Bam had painstakingly drawn a golden heartagram on it with fabric pens. Ville undid the zip, and found what seemed to be a lifetime supply of black eyeliner inside.
“Jesus, Bam, how much did that cost you?” Ville looked up at him in amazement.
“Not much, April’s friends sent it from the states; they get it cheap since they work in a beauty parlor… But whatever. Now you never have an excuse not to wear it, okay?” Ville grinned and nodded, and then passed Bam his last and most important present. Bam poked it.
“It’s squishy!” Ville laughed, watching him as he unwrapped it. He pulled out a long black jacket, made of the same fabric that Ville’s own very warm coat was.
“It’s the warmest fabric ever. It looks thin but it keeps you toasty.” Bam looked at the jacket in the flickering light. It was covered in writing, intricate designs, some small pictures. Looking closer at the writing, he saw the lyrics from the songs that Ville would sing to him, both the ones that he’d made up himself and ones that they both loved, or which had a special meaning for them. There were phrases that they said, and there were heartagrams all over.
“Oh my god, Ville! It’s amazing. It’s going to take me hours to read all this…”
“Look in the pockets!” Ville said, grinning. Bam, still amazed, dug around in the big pockets. In the first one he found a handful of his favorite Finnish chocolate, Tupla, which came wrapped in elegant black paper with red writing, and which Bam liked to look at just as much as he liked to eat. The next one had a tape in it.
“What’s this?”
“It’s got all the songs on it that are on the jacket,” Ville said. “And a few extra.” Bam smiled. “And the next pocket, Bam.”
“There isn’t one!”
“Yes there is, it’s on the inside.” Bam found it, and pulled out what looked like a rosary chain, but on the end, instead of a cross, there hung a heartagram.
“What… where’d you get this?”
“I got someone to make it for me,” Ville said.
“It’s beautiful…” Bam put it around his neck and let the heartagram fall on his chest. He smiled.
“Thank you.”
“You’re very welcome.”
“Here. Last present.”
“There’s another one?”
“Of course.” He passed Ville a long, thin box. Ville opened it carefully. Inside there was a black case with a silver clasp, and the words ‘Minä Rakastan Sinua’ written on the top with silver. Ville undid the clasp and pulled out a silver microphone. On the base, it had an inscription: “To My Willa Walo - So That Whenever You Sing You’ll Be Singing To Me. -Bam, 2000.” Ville stared at it.
“I know… you already have one… but I couldn’t think of anything else and I thought you might want to save the other one, cuz its Jesse’s and all that… and…”
“Bam… I…” Ville was lost for words. He turned the microphone over in his hands, lightly tracing the lettering with his thumb. “. . . wow.”
“You like it?” Bam asked, tentatively.
“I love it… its beautiful…”
“It’s just a microphone…”
“But… it’s the most amazing present I’ve ever had…” Ville smiled at Bam.
“So now you have to sing! Because you have to use it or I’ll be offended.” Bam nodded, winking at him. Ville shook his head slightly.
“… I guess I will, won’t I?” Bam grinned.
“Do you mean … you’ll try?”
“Do you really, really want me to?”
“I want you to do what will make you happy, Ville… but I think that will make you happy.” Ville looked at the microphone in his hands. It was the perfect weight, the perfect size; the whole thing just felt completely right. He nodded slowly.
“I… I guess so…” Bam grinned. Ville put the microphone carefully back in its box, reaching back into the snow to find the bottle of champagne. Bam stared at him.
“Serious?”
“Of course. Hey, what’s the point in being 18 if you can’t buy expensive alcohol?” Bam laughed. They popped the cork together, managing to somehow not get completely covered in the overflow.
“Merry Christmas,” Ville said, raising his mug - which they’d cleaned out with snow.
“Merry Christmas.” They clinked their mugs together and drank. After the bottle was empty, they kissed for a little while, just simple, sweet kisses. No need, no demand, just pure affection. After awhile though, even the multitude of thick blankets wasn’t keeping out the cold. Bam was shivering heavily now, and even Ville was feeling the cold.
“I guess we’d better go, huh?” Ville said. They were laying down again, peering up through the labyrinth of branches. Bam sighed.
“I don’t want to… but I guess so…” Ville made Bam stand up and started packing everything up. Bam clutched onto his new coat, having put everything else in his bag. Once Ville had packed everything up, Ville opened the door of his Dad’s friend’s shop with the key that he’d borrowed, put his bag inside the door, and locked it again. He put his hand in Bam’s glove again, and they walked slowly home. Ville was secretly dreading leaving Bam at his door, but as they stood outside kissing goodbye, Bam stopped and looked at him.
“Do you want to spend the night? I mean, we’re leaving at like, 8, but you can always let yourself out… I’ll give you a key…” Ville’s smile meant yes. It was surprisingly early - only 9 o’clock. Bam thought that they had been under that tree for ages.
“Boys! You two look frozen through! What have you been doing?” April looked up in surprise from the sink, where she was finishing up the dishes.
“We had a picnic,” Bam said, grinning, sliding his and Ville’s hands out of the glove.
“You what? Brandon, its like, -20 degrees out there. Fahrenheit! Are you two crazy?!” They nodded, smiling.
“But Mom, Mom, look what Ville gave me!” Bam lifted up the jacket. April took it and looked it all over in wonder.
“Ville, dear, that’s beautiful. How long did that take you?” Ville shrugged.
“I don’t know… a while. Doesn’t matter… I enjoyed it.” April smiled at him, and handed the coat back to Bam. “Have you tried it on yet dear?” Bam shook his head, and quickly took his coat off. The jacket fitted him perfectly. Ville stood back to admire him.
“Perfect,” said April. Bam nodded, craning his neck to see the back.
“How’s it make my butt look, Ville?” he asked. Ville laughed.
“Turn around,” he said. Bam obeyed. “Sexy,” he chuckled. April laughed at them.
“Do you boys want something to eat?” They nodded simultaneously. Bam pulled off the jacket carefully, and placed it on the bench. April heated up the leftovers from the meal that she was still cleaning up from, and then left them to eat it alone. When she came in once to get a drink for Phil, Bam was feeding Ville from his fork. She smiled and hurried out of the room. After they were done eating, Bam had to pack his things, so they escaped up to his room.
“Bam!” April called after him.
“Yeah?”
“Is Ville spending the night?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay… he knows we’re leaving early, right?”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s okay. I’ll give him my key.”
“Great. You’re going to get packed now, right?”
“Yeah, yeah. Ape, quit worrying!”
“Sorry…”
“Ville’s spending the night?” Phil asked when April came back in the room.
“Yeah. Why?”
“In the same bed?”
“Um, well, Bam only owns one bed…”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“Phil. Jesus. Do they look like kids who are going to go … doing… that?”
“I don’t know.”
“Phil, they’ve been spending the night together for ages. I really don’t think there’s anything to worry about. Anyways. Bam can take care of himself.” Phil shrugged. He didn’t like it. And he still didn’t like it when he went upstairs and heard faint moaning coming out of Bam’s bedroom. What scared him even more was when Jess opened the door of Bam’s room and walked out of it, grinning. He saw his dad staring at him and stopped.
“What?”
“What are they doing in there?”
“What? Oh, that? Oh. Bam got this massage machine as a Christmas present… it’s the most amazing thing in the world. You have to try it. What? You looked so relieved…”
“Yeah… well… I heard moaning and … I thought…” Jess laughed.
“Phil! You think Bam and Ville would… are you serious? They wouldn’t … no! You have to be kidding me; you thought they were actually… hahahha that’s hilarious.” Jess just shook his head. “Quit worrying about it Phil. They’re good kids. I can’t believe you thought they were… hehehee…” Jess rolled his eyes and disappeared into his bedroom. Phil timidly knocked on the door.
“Yeah?”
“Bam? Can I come in?”
“Sure.” Phil went in to find Bam sitting behind Ville, holding an odd looking electrical appliance in his hand. “Phil, this thing is like, amazing, you have got to try it. Watch what it does.” Bam turned it on and put it on Ville’s shoulder - Ville’s back automatically stretched out and the muscles shook a little as it kneaded all the tenseness and stress out of his joints. Bam switched it off; Ville shuddered.
“God. That’s good…” Phil laughed. Bam motioned to the bed next to him.
“C’mere. You got to try this.” Phil did as he was bidden - when Bam turned the machine on and put it on his back, he thought he had never felt anything that good before. Bam laughed and turned it off.
“That’s amazing,” Phil said. “Who gave you it?”
“Ville did.”
“Great gift. I’ll be stealing that from him. Okay… I just wanted to say, you know, Bam should go to sleep soon because we have to leave early…”
“I know Phil.”
“Right. Okay. Good night.” Phil left them, and closed the door behind him. He was still a little disturbed, but, really, if he thought about it, Ville was a nice boy. But he was a boy. Shuddering, Phil crossed to his and April’s room and fell into bed.
“Phil, just don’t think about Ville as another boy,” April said without even looking up from her book. “I’m pretty sure Bam doesn’t either.”
“But he is.” April shrugged.
“He’s quite feminine, you know. At least Bam’s not the ‘girl’ of the couple.”
“April. My son is gay. Just let me be shocked.”
“Do you really think Bam is gay?” April was looking at him now.
“Well, he’s dating a boy! That means he’s gay.”
“What if it’s just a one off thing?”
“He’s dating another boy right now. That makes him gay right now. April, it’s okay, it’s just… weird.” April patted his shoulder.
“You’ll get over it.”
“How did you deal with it? Don’t you think it’s weird?” April shrugged.
“Sure. But I can also see that that boy makes Bam happy. And if he’s happy, he’s not angry at me and you for moving him.”
“Right.”
“Just ignore it Phil. He’ll get over it soon enough. High school romances never last.”
Bam and Ville stayed up talking until the small hours of the morning. Bam had actually lost count of how many times he’d said “goodnight, I’m going to sleep,” because one of them would always say something and bring up another topic. When 7 o’clock rolled around, they’d been asleep for about 2 hours. Ville was, once again, wearing Bam’s boxers, and they had fallen asleep with their arms wrapped around each other. April came in the room and saw them laying with their faces turned towards each other, breathing softly. She almost felt guilty waking them, but she didn’t want to be late for the plane.
“Bam, Bam darling, come on. Wake up.” Bam’s eyes opened slowly, and he carefully disentangled himself from Ville. “Hurry, finish packing, get dressed, and let’s go. We’re going to be late.” She left the room and Bam got up quietly, rushing around to find all of his clothes and finish putting things in his suitcase. He had just finished zipping his suitcase and was stuffing the remnants of the jelly bread April had passed him through the door when Ville started moving his arms and legs and moaning a little.
“Bam?” Bam looked over from where he was standing by the door with his suitcase in hand. He was wearing the jacket Ville had given him the day before, ready to leave. “You weren’t just going to leave, were you?”
“I didn’t want to wake you up,” Bam said, crossing the room to sit on the bed.
“Bam, come on, let’s go!” Jess called from downstairs.
“You have to go right now?” Bam nodded. “Wait. 10 seconds.” Ville got up and dug around in his pile of clothes.
“Here.” He handed Bam the dark blue scarf that he always wore; his lucky scarf; the one his mom gave him.
“What? Ville, I can’t take this.”
“Yes you can. And you will. Just for now. For luck.”
“Why will I need luck?”
“I just have the feeling you will. Just wear it.”
“What about you?”
“I have the one you gave me, remember?”
“Oh. Okay…” They looked at each other for a little, but were interrupted by Jess again.
“Bam! Hurry up!”
“You better go.”
“Yeah. Here’s the key. You don’t need to leave right away… sleep for a while.”
“I will.” Bam wrapped his arms around Ville’s neck and kissed him.
“Bye,” he said.
“Bye Bammie. Merry Christmas… I’ll miss you…”
“I’ll miss you too. Merry Christmas.” After one last sweet kiss, Bam was running down the stairs and Ville was watching him climb into the taxi through the window, listening to their laughter before the door slammed shut, and he sat staring after them still in the silence after the taxi’s roaring engine faded away into nothing.