ex_heartagr
in
__vam
(no subject)
First things first, this is our VERSION of how Bam discovered HIM for the first time and everything after that is pretty much a tad bit on an AU only with the exception of it being in character and a few things here and there might be familar as from our Bam/Ville knowledge.
This story is also from the idea that Ms. xfalling gave me based on the movie Serendipity and I am also incoporating some Phantom of the Opera thoughts into it. And if you dont get it - just read the story and hopefully all this make sense. ;).
Title: Look What You've Done
Summary: A chance meeting haunts Bam in more than one way...will fantasy become reality?
Authors: chair_sex and itwaslv2me
Disclaimer: Nope, although we might sorta wish!
Prolouge ( Smiled like an angel - falling from grace! )
Chapter 1 - ( And all his wishes have finally come true... )
Chapter 2 - ( Every Sunrise Our Sins are Forgiven )
Chapter 3 - ( All I ever wanted was you, my love. )
Chapter 4 - ( A flickering flame so serene )
Chapter 5 ( This Romeo is bleeding, but you can't see his blood... )
Chapter 6 - (The Night Goes On As I’m Fading Away)
Chapter 7 ( So Close Your Eyes And Say Goodbye )
Chapter 8 - ( All That I Have Left Of You To Hold )
Chapter 9 ( Wish I Could Turn Back The Hands Of Time )
Chapter 10 ( I'm Here Without You, Baby. )
It was several months since Ville had headed home, although Bam had no idea that the man from Finland he thought about daily had ever been there. Bam was generally a happy-go-lucky, live in the moment kind of guy. Today, however, he was just frustrated. Every Saturday he allowed himself several hours to try to track down the skateboard. With only about three months left, he was feeling more discouraged than anything else. His answer to his mood was to call the crew and go to the local pub for large amounts of alcohol. The guys had all agreed. He didn’t elaborate why he wanted to go; only that he did. Holding hands as they entered, he ignored the look Dunn had given him the whole way to the pub. Now that they were all settled and laughing, Bam hung on the outskirts of the group, choosing a stool several feet from the crew. He could hear and look on, but also be left to his own plan to get shit-faced by midnight.
Around 11 o’clock, Bam had to use the bathroom more than anything. He excused himself and headed towards the men’s room as Dunn saluted him with a beer and turned back to the in-depth conversation he was having with an already drunk Raab and a disinterested Dico. He entered the bathroom and stopped by the small oval mirror that hung over the sink. Through the dirt and grime that had never been removed, he saw what he suspected was himself with dark circles under his eyes and uncombed hair. He looked as if a small tornado may have been what got him to the bar instead of his Hummer. “Man, Margera you are not yourself! What the fuck is up with your hair?” Bam questioned himself. “And those circles under your eyes do not do the baby blues justice!” Waving at himself in the mirror, he turned into the nearest stall disgusted with himself and his situation. He really had no one to blame, but himself. If he hadn’t freaked out over a stupid bird, he could be…where exactly? Jet-setting around the world with Ville, making love to the gorgeous man on the sand of the European beaches he had always wanted to see, skating in West Chester with Ville watching, or just happily having a long distance relationship. Nothing had really pointed out to him that long term had been definite. They had only just met. The blinding attraction was so strong that neither man had really been able to fight it. Both had stepped right out of their normal boundaries and had a momentary fling. No, that was doing what they had an injustice. Not a fling, an affair or a rendezvous. “What the fuck…when have you ever used the word rendezvous, Margera?” Bam continued the conversation with himself. Leaning against the wall of the stall, he sighed aloud.
“What is wrong with you? You are not some love-sick girl and you are definitely not a groupie. And this is all some strange bit of indigestion or maybe you haven’t drunk enough. You are not going to let yourself go to shit Brandon. He is just a man who got to you. You need to give up this ridiculous quest and stop acting like some haggard bitch.”
“Don’t give up on us, Bammie,” a low voice came from the other side of the stall.
Startled by the familiarity of the accent, Bam stood up properly and threw open the door. “Ville?” he called over the bang of the door hitting the next stall. He raced out and saw no one. Noticing the door back to the bar moving slightly, he raced into the pub. “Ville!” he called. Circling his head around he looked for the man. He raced around peering into booths and corners and finally burst out onto the street. “Are you there?” Bam inquired.
“The fuck, Bam?” Ryan came out and jerked Bam’s arm attempting to bring him back to reality. “How many beers have you had?”
“He’s here. He talked to me. In the bathroom. I heard him. I felt him there.”
“Bam, listen you are not making any sense. I am going to take you home. Just come inside for a minute. Glomb just got here and I want to let him and the crew know I am taking you home.”
“I don’t want to go home. I want to stay right here where he is!”
“Bam, you are acting ridiculous. There is no one here!” Dunn put his hand on the small of Bam’s back and guided him inside. Just as Bam crossed the threshold, Dunn turned and peered over his shoulder wondering if there really was a dark haired man in the shadows haunting Bam.
A few weeks later, with the night in the bar safely tucked away in his memories, Bam headed to New York to go on TRL. Bam had checked only once more for the skateboard and also to see where Ville’s band was in the world. He really hadn’t been able to find information on either, so he gave up and threw himself into editing the extras for his DVD. It was the release date and MTV had asked him to come to promote his show. Unable to say no to the company who wrote his paycheck, Bam found himself heading by limo to the studio in New York.
After he arrived, he freshened up as much as he would allow himself to be primped for the set, and it was show time. He answered the interviewers questions, narrated a clip or two from the season, and went on to take some viewer calls. After a question about directions to his house (no he wouldn’t give those out) and one about how April really feels about him (it’s his mom, how the hell do you think she feels?), he was told that he would take one more call after the commercial break. While the cameras were off Bam greeted his fans.
“30 seconds” someone called. Bam resumed his position near the interviewer and silently prayed that the next caller might be somewhat more intelligent.
“You’re on the air with Bam, what would you like to ask?”
“I want to know if Bam remembers this, ‘All love that has not friendship for its base, Is like a mansion built upon the sand.’
Bam felt his mouth fall open speechless. “Yes,” he whispered almost inaudibly.
Not sure what was happening, the interview tried so engage the caller in conversation until Bam came around. “Did you go to school with Bam?”
“No, I just wanted to remind him that the foundation of friendship is strong to build the mansion on, so he shouldn’t give up his plans so easily.”
“Ok, thank you for those inspiring words. Bam? Do you want to ask the caller anything or respond to his comment?”
“I want to know where the caller is calling from.”
“Oh, I am sorry Bam it seems we have lost the call. They must have hung up.”
Bam looked directly into the camera. “I have not given up. Have you?”
“Alright, Bam the joker has become Bam the cryptic. Can we expect more of this sort of thing in the new season that premieres next month?”
Bam looked blankly at the interviewer. “We are taking our show to a whole new level in the future. We are adding a Sci-Fi element and Rake is going to tell fortunes.” With that Bam thanked the audience and went back to his dressing room. He wasn’t crazy, he wasn’t. This time he had thousands of viewers as witnesses.
As soon as Bam got home from the show, he found himself online booking a ticket to Helsinki. This was one of the worst times to go, seeing as filming would start again soon, but he didn’t care. Once the flight that left the next day was booked, Bam made hotel reservations at the hotel he had previously stayed at. He closed the laptop just as Dunn came into the room. “Whatcha doin’” Dunn inquired through a mouth full of potato chips.”
“I am about to pack for a long weekend away.”
“Where are we going?”
“Not we, me. You are right, Dunn, I have been too stressed out. So, I have decided to take a sometime to regroup before filming. Just think of it as some time away in the country.” Bam was almost shocked to hear himself not really give Dunn all the information. Of course, he was more shocked that he had actually booked the plane ticket. “Besides, I need you to watch over Castle Bam and answer the MTV calls that will come in as I am finding myself.” Bam gave Ryan his most charming grin.
“Ok, ok! Go do what you gotta do, but if you are going to be more than a week call ok.”
“Oh and Ry,” Bam called as Ryan left the room. “If you are lonely you can always have your friend sleep over!” Bam winked at Dunn as a pillow came sailing his way.
Bam arrived in Helsinki less than 48 hours later. It was as cold and crisp and as beautiful as he had remembered it. He went to the hotel and checked in. Lying back on his bed he allowed himself to think freely about his last visit here. Something he had not allowed himself to do in months. Memories of his last trip washed over him like the gentle swells of the ocean near the shore on a quiet day. It was really one of the most beautiful feelings. Warmth radiated from the memory and circled around him. It was as if he could feel Ville’s arms around him. Maybe he could, if he just let himself escape consciousness for a while.
Several hours later Bam woke up and stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Maybe the short sleep or just the fact that he was in Helsinki was agreeing with him. He looked less like the frazzled man at the bar that time and more like his old self. Picking up his skateboard, Bam decided to go around the city for a while. He was really unsure where anything was except for the bar down the road. He had been so intent on following Ville, he hadn’t actually stopped to notice the directions of where they went. Skating along, Bam stopped at the bar and went in for a beer. He took it to the table he had been at with Ville. It was still early, so the place was still getting ready to open. He was one of the few customers. Finishing the beer, he inhaled, hoping to get a familiar scent to link with his memory. All he smelled was alcohol and stale cigarettes. The smell was not distinct, it was more like every other bar he had been in.
Bam walked around outside to the spot where he had first kissed Ville. “If I was really being haunted, this would be a perfect place to come face to face with my ghost,” he mumbled. Glancing behind him in slight expectation, he turned and skated off. Bam followed the roads wherever they led.
By 11:00 Bam was exhausted both mentally from his memories and physically from the jetlag. Heading back to the hotel he welcomed the chance to go and rest. Falling into a deep sleep, the dreamless night brought Bam the rest and peace he needed.
Feeling rejuvenated Bam decided to go and visit the chapel. Looking at it as he approached, he decided not to go and stand on the steps. Considering he was the superstitious one these days, he didn’t want to play around with fate. Bam sat on a nearby bench for awhile and took out a little notebook from his pocket. Bam was never much of a writer, preferring film to journals. He had hoped to be inspired to write more than he did, but he wrote just a single sentence. “V- See you soon! -B” Bam took the note and ripped it off the pad and left it on the first step of the cathedral, placing it in a slightly damp area where he knew it would stick to the step. Bam walked down the road and stopped to get a drink. Seeing the hour grow late, Bam skated back the way he had come. A small smile spread across his face as he noticed the note was gone as he went by the step.
The following day, Bam skated for a while just trying to clear his head. He came home early to get ready for dinner. After a little trouble and a little help from the people who worked the desk, Bam had managed to secure dinner reservations at the place where the party he attended had been. It was an old hotel of sorts. As he approached he noticed its more gothic nature. Bam realized how enamored he must have been when he had been there last not to have noticed the architecture. He slapped himself on his head hoping to shake himself from his mental fog. After getting a table and dining, Bam decided to allow himself a trip to the balcony.
Cautiously he opened the door and peered out into the cool dark night. Bam went walked out and went over to the railing. He looked over the rail into the blackness of the city night. Here and there streetlights made little dots along the horizon. Bam turned around and leaned on the rail where he had so many months ago. It felt like a lifetime. He was beginning to doubt that his time here had really existed. “I’m here,” he said softly into the night. “Where are you?”
Bam closed his eyes and breathed deeply willing himself to feel the presence of the man who haunted his dreams and his waking life. That is how Bam stood there, eyes closed, lips slightly parted, loosing track of reality and time.
Bam jumped slightly as he felt an aura around him. “Ssh! Don’t open you eyes or I’ll disappear,” Bam thought he heard on the fringes of his sub-consciousness. He nodded slightly and remained frozen from fear of the tricks he knew his mind must be playing on him. His senses heightened, Bam was not surprised to feel a gentle soft kiss grace his lips. It was sweet and light. Not much like most of their kisses except for the last one. It felt as if a finger as light as a feather traced round his features and landed on his lips as if to he silence him. Bam felt a warmth spread through him.
As quickly as this feeling had come, he felt it start to slip away. Bam slowly opened one eye and then another. He stared into the emptiness of the balcony. He inhaled deeply sure he smelled the mix of cigarettes, spice, and alcohol that always surrounded Ville on the fringes of the crisp night air. Bam smiled just a bit as he was sure he saw the door to the steps rock back and forth slightly amongst the recently disturbed swirls of mist.
-I'm sorry this Chapter took forever to get out, itwaslv2me had sent it to me even earlier then before but I had been so busy with IRL drama that I couldn't handle my own life and hadda but a hiatus to it. So it was hard for me to comprehend and be all *posts this* because I clearly am that dumb. I love you all and my chapter will be out soon. I promise to get on the swing of things. And if I don't feel free to comment me and be all "GET TO WORK RISSA!!" I like encouragment! ;) I love you muchly, hope this chapter can tie you over to my turn! Muuaaahz.
This story is also from the idea that Ms. xfalling gave me based on the movie Serendipity and I am also incoporating some Phantom of the Opera thoughts into it. And if you dont get it - just read the story and hopefully all this make sense. ;).
Title: Look What You've Done
Summary: A chance meeting haunts Bam in more than one way...will fantasy become reality?
Authors: chair_sex and itwaslv2me
Disclaimer: Nope, although we might sorta wish!
Prolouge ( Smiled like an angel - falling from grace! )
Chapter 1 - ( And all his wishes have finally come true... )
Chapter 2 - ( Every Sunrise Our Sins are Forgiven )
Chapter 3 - ( All I ever wanted was you, my love. )
Chapter 4 - ( A flickering flame so serene )
Chapter 5 ( This Romeo is bleeding, but you can't see his blood... )
Chapter 6 - (The Night Goes On As I’m Fading Away)
Chapter 7 ( So Close Your Eyes And Say Goodbye )
Chapter 8 - ( All That I Have Left Of You To Hold )
Chapter 9 ( Wish I Could Turn Back The Hands Of Time )
Chapter 10 ( I'm Here Without You, Baby. )
It was several months since Ville had headed home, although Bam had no idea that the man from Finland he thought about daily had ever been there. Bam was generally a happy-go-lucky, live in the moment kind of guy. Today, however, he was just frustrated. Every Saturday he allowed himself several hours to try to track down the skateboard. With only about three months left, he was feeling more discouraged than anything else. His answer to his mood was to call the crew and go to the local pub for large amounts of alcohol. The guys had all agreed. He didn’t elaborate why he wanted to go; only that he did. Holding hands as they entered, he ignored the look Dunn had given him the whole way to the pub. Now that they were all settled and laughing, Bam hung on the outskirts of the group, choosing a stool several feet from the crew. He could hear and look on, but also be left to his own plan to get shit-faced by midnight.
Around 11 o’clock, Bam had to use the bathroom more than anything. He excused himself and headed towards the men’s room as Dunn saluted him with a beer and turned back to the in-depth conversation he was having with an already drunk Raab and a disinterested Dico. He entered the bathroom and stopped by the small oval mirror that hung over the sink. Through the dirt and grime that had never been removed, he saw what he suspected was himself with dark circles under his eyes and uncombed hair. He looked as if a small tornado may have been what got him to the bar instead of his Hummer. “Man, Margera you are not yourself! What the fuck is up with your hair?” Bam questioned himself. “And those circles under your eyes do not do the baby blues justice!” Waving at himself in the mirror, he turned into the nearest stall disgusted with himself and his situation. He really had no one to blame, but himself. If he hadn’t freaked out over a stupid bird, he could be…where exactly? Jet-setting around the world with Ville, making love to the gorgeous man on the sand of the European beaches he had always wanted to see, skating in West Chester with Ville watching, or just happily having a long distance relationship. Nothing had really pointed out to him that long term had been definite. They had only just met. The blinding attraction was so strong that neither man had really been able to fight it. Both had stepped right out of their normal boundaries and had a momentary fling. No, that was doing what they had an injustice. Not a fling, an affair or a rendezvous. “What the fuck…when have you ever used the word rendezvous, Margera?” Bam continued the conversation with himself. Leaning against the wall of the stall, he sighed aloud.
“What is wrong with you? You are not some love-sick girl and you are definitely not a groupie. And this is all some strange bit of indigestion or maybe you haven’t drunk enough. You are not going to let yourself go to shit Brandon. He is just a man who got to you. You need to give up this ridiculous quest and stop acting like some haggard bitch.”
“Don’t give up on us, Bammie,” a low voice came from the other side of the stall.
Startled by the familiarity of the accent, Bam stood up properly and threw open the door. “Ville?” he called over the bang of the door hitting the next stall. He raced out and saw no one. Noticing the door back to the bar moving slightly, he raced into the pub. “Ville!” he called. Circling his head around he looked for the man. He raced around peering into booths and corners and finally burst out onto the street. “Are you there?” Bam inquired.
“The fuck, Bam?” Ryan came out and jerked Bam’s arm attempting to bring him back to reality. “How many beers have you had?”
“He’s here. He talked to me. In the bathroom. I heard him. I felt him there.”
“Bam, listen you are not making any sense. I am going to take you home. Just come inside for a minute. Glomb just got here and I want to let him and the crew know I am taking you home.”
“I don’t want to go home. I want to stay right here where he is!”
“Bam, you are acting ridiculous. There is no one here!” Dunn put his hand on the small of Bam’s back and guided him inside. Just as Bam crossed the threshold, Dunn turned and peered over his shoulder wondering if there really was a dark haired man in the shadows haunting Bam.
A few weeks later, with the night in the bar safely tucked away in his memories, Bam headed to New York to go on TRL. Bam had checked only once more for the skateboard and also to see where Ville’s band was in the world. He really hadn’t been able to find information on either, so he gave up and threw himself into editing the extras for his DVD. It was the release date and MTV had asked him to come to promote his show. Unable to say no to the company who wrote his paycheck, Bam found himself heading by limo to the studio in New York.
After he arrived, he freshened up as much as he would allow himself to be primped for the set, and it was show time. He answered the interviewers questions, narrated a clip or two from the season, and went on to take some viewer calls. After a question about directions to his house (no he wouldn’t give those out) and one about how April really feels about him (it’s his mom, how the hell do you think she feels?), he was told that he would take one more call after the commercial break. While the cameras were off Bam greeted his fans.
“30 seconds” someone called. Bam resumed his position near the interviewer and silently prayed that the next caller might be somewhat more intelligent.
“You’re on the air with Bam, what would you like to ask?”
“I want to know if Bam remembers this, ‘All love that has not friendship for its base, Is like a mansion built upon the sand.’
Bam felt his mouth fall open speechless. “Yes,” he whispered almost inaudibly.
Not sure what was happening, the interview tried so engage the caller in conversation until Bam came around. “Did you go to school with Bam?”
“No, I just wanted to remind him that the foundation of friendship is strong to build the mansion on, so he shouldn’t give up his plans so easily.”
“Ok, thank you for those inspiring words. Bam? Do you want to ask the caller anything or respond to his comment?”
“I want to know where the caller is calling from.”
“Oh, I am sorry Bam it seems we have lost the call. They must have hung up.”
Bam looked directly into the camera. “I have not given up. Have you?”
“Alright, Bam the joker has become Bam the cryptic. Can we expect more of this sort of thing in the new season that premieres next month?”
Bam looked blankly at the interviewer. “We are taking our show to a whole new level in the future. We are adding a Sci-Fi element and Rake is going to tell fortunes.” With that Bam thanked the audience and went back to his dressing room. He wasn’t crazy, he wasn’t. This time he had thousands of viewers as witnesses.
As soon as Bam got home from the show, he found himself online booking a ticket to Helsinki. This was one of the worst times to go, seeing as filming would start again soon, but he didn’t care. Once the flight that left the next day was booked, Bam made hotel reservations at the hotel he had previously stayed at. He closed the laptop just as Dunn came into the room. “Whatcha doin’” Dunn inquired through a mouth full of potato chips.”
“I am about to pack for a long weekend away.”
“Where are we going?”
“Not we, me. You are right, Dunn, I have been too stressed out. So, I have decided to take a sometime to regroup before filming. Just think of it as some time away in the country.” Bam was almost shocked to hear himself not really give Dunn all the information. Of course, he was more shocked that he had actually booked the plane ticket. “Besides, I need you to watch over Castle Bam and answer the MTV calls that will come in as I am finding myself.” Bam gave Ryan his most charming grin.
“Ok, ok! Go do what you gotta do, but if you are going to be more than a week call ok.”
“Oh and Ry,” Bam called as Ryan left the room. “If you are lonely you can always have your friend sleep over!” Bam winked at Dunn as a pillow came sailing his way.
Bam arrived in Helsinki less than 48 hours later. It was as cold and crisp and as beautiful as he had remembered it. He went to the hotel and checked in. Lying back on his bed he allowed himself to think freely about his last visit here. Something he had not allowed himself to do in months. Memories of his last trip washed over him like the gentle swells of the ocean near the shore on a quiet day. It was really one of the most beautiful feelings. Warmth radiated from the memory and circled around him. It was as if he could feel Ville’s arms around him. Maybe he could, if he just let himself escape consciousness for a while.
Several hours later Bam woke up and stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Maybe the short sleep or just the fact that he was in Helsinki was agreeing with him. He looked less like the frazzled man at the bar that time and more like his old self. Picking up his skateboard, Bam decided to go around the city for a while. He was really unsure where anything was except for the bar down the road. He had been so intent on following Ville, he hadn’t actually stopped to notice the directions of where they went. Skating along, Bam stopped at the bar and went in for a beer. He took it to the table he had been at with Ville. It was still early, so the place was still getting ready to open. He was one of the few customers. Finishing the beer, he inhaled, hoping to get a familiar scent to link with his memory. All he smelled was alcohol and stale cigarettes. The smell was not distinct, it was more like every other bar he had been in.
Bam walked around outside to the spot where he had first kissed Ville. “If I was really being haunted, this would be a perfect place to come face to face with my ghost,” he mumbled. Glancing behind him in slight expectation, he turned and skated off. Bam followed the roads wherever they led.
By 11:00 Bam was exhausted both mentally from his memories and physically from the jetlag. Heading back to the hotel he welcomed the chance to go and rest. Falling into a deep sleep, the dreamless night brought Bam the rest and peace he needed.
Feeling rejuvenated Bam decided to go and visit the chapel. Looking at it as he approached, he decided not to go and stand on the steps. Considering he was the superstitious one these days, he didn’t want to play around with fate. Bam sat on a nearby bench for awhile and took out a little notebook from his pocket. Bam was never much of a writer, preferring film to journals. He had hoped to be inspired to write more than he did, but he wrote just a single sentence. “V- See you soon! -B” Bam took the note and ripped it off the pad and left it on the first step of the cathedral, placing it in a slightly damp area where he knew it would stick to the step. Bam walked down the road and stopped to get a drink. Seeing the hour grow late, Bam skated back the way he had come. A small smile spread across his face as he noticed the note was gone as he went by the step.
The following day, Bam skated for a while just trying to clear his head. He came home early to get ready for dinner. After a little trouble and a little help from the people who worked the desk, Bam had managed to secure dinner reservations at the place where the party he attended had been. It was an old hotel of sorts. As he approached he noticed its more gothic nature. Bam realized how enamored he must have been when he had been there last not to have noticed the architecture. He slapped himself on his head hoping to shake himself from his mental fog. After getting a table and dining, Bam decided to allow himself a trip to the balcony.
Cautiously he opened the door and peered out into the cool dark night. Bam went walked out and went over to the railing. He looked over the rail into the blackness of the city night. Here and there streetlights made little dots along the horizon. Bam turned around and leaned on the rail where he had so many months ago. It felt like a lifetime. He was beginning to doubt that his time here had really existed. “I’m here,” he said softly into the night. “Where are you?”
Bam closed his eyes and breathed deeply willing himself to feel the presence of the man who haunted his dreams and his waking life. That is how Bam stood there, eyes closed, lips slightly parted, loosing track of reality and time.
Bam jumped slightly as he felt an aura around him. “Ssh! Don’t open you eyes or I’ll disappear,” Bam thought he heard on the fringes of his sub-consciousness. He nodded slightly and remained frozen from fear of the tricks he knew his mind must be playing on him. His senses heightened, Bam was not surprised to feel a gentle soft kiss grace his lips. It was sweet and light. Not much like most of their kisses except for the last one. It felt as if a finger as light as a feather traced round his features and landed on his lips as if to he silence him. Bam felt a warmth spread through him.
As quickly as this feeling had come, he felt it start to slip away. Bam slowly opened one eye and then another. He stared into the emptiness of the balcony. He inhaled deeply sure he smelled the mix of cigarettes, spice, and alcohol that always surrounded Ville on the fringes of the crisp night air. Bam smiled just a bit as he was sure he saw the door to the steps rock back and forth slightly amongst the recently disturbed swirls of mist.
-I'm sorry this Chapter took forever to get out, itwaslv2me had sent it to me even earlier then before but I had been so busy with IRL drama that I couldn't handle my own life and hadda but a hiatus to it. So it was hard for me to comprehend and be all *posts this* because I clearly am that dumb. I love you all and my chapter will be out soon. I promise to get on the swing of things. And if I don't feel free to comment me and be all "GET TO WORK RISSA!!" I like encouragment! ;) I love you muchly, hope this chapter can tie you over to my turn! Muuaaahz.