Help me Forget (One-shot)
Title: Help Me Forget
Rating: PG-13
Paring: Vam, Bam/Missy
Summery: “If I tell you my biggest heart desire, will you tell me yours?” you were hugging your knees, your head resting upon them. You were only 29, recently engaged to a beautiful Finnish model, but looking so lonely there one could never guess. “It’s Jonna; everyone knows that.” Your eyes ( Read more... )
I took a litle longer on responding, because I read the whole story twice instead of once, afraid that I was going to miss something.
I love the dream like opening of the story, where it already becomes apparent that Bam is certainly not over Ville yet. Then the internal struggle in Bam that follows up - What if it takes him back to square one? - is just heartbreaking. It is beautiful to see that he wants to move on, yet he cannot seem to let go of the past.
The dialogue is seemingly very realistic, and has a lovely flow to it, de descriptions likewise. I like the fact that Ville does not give in after a few apologies of Bam, but instead lets him find out the hurt he has caused Ville by himself. The fact that you made Ville rather distant, yet he is unable to keep his feelings from Bam any longer after a while - “Am I hurting you, Ville?” - “I deserve it.” - works very well for me.
I wasn't exactly sure if Bam would be forgiven, but I am glad to see that Ville is able to move on and give it one more shot. While I do like it that you have left the ending open [by this I mean that they still remain friends], I can't help but wonder if they will ever get together [again].
Overall, you did an excellent job on this fic! Sorry for the slight ramble, but I actually think I will be memorizing this, so that I can re-read it whenever I feel like it;)
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Normally, when i want to cause a conflict I either write it so that one character is just as much to blame for the dilemma as the other, or write from the seemingly guiltiest POV to evoke sympathy on the part of the readers. In this one, I think Bam and Ville are both to blame; Bam for not knowing what he wants and Ville for playing with Bam's emotions when he knows Bam's not those types of people who are comfortable with their sexualities. I chose Bam's POV b/c I knew I was going to make it like Ville's the victim, but at the same time wanted the reader to feel closer to Bam and feel his pain and give him a chance to prove himself before being judged.
With an open ending, one would never know, not even the author herself ;) but my guess is that it'll take them both a long while before things start to get back to normal. I just wanted to give them a way out, b/c I would most probably suffocate if i didn't ;)
Wow, I'm so honored! wonder if you've ever read my chapter-story 'Half a World Away'. I'm really working hard on that one, so i really need feedback!
p.s. see? I can ramble too ;)
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