hey guys, been a while ^_^

[drunkonhim]

Title: Just a Whore
Summary: my personal spin on the movie "Pretty Woman". Ville is a young whore, trapped and searching for his saviour
Pairing: various, but mostly focused on Vam. there will be some surprise guests though
Disclaimer: i own nothing and no one. please don't sue!
A/N: Sorry its been so long guys. I've only recently gotten some time to sit down and write, so I bring you a little fluff and some agnst. Not the best, but the next chapter will bring turning points. Anyway, enjoy ;)



Previous Chatper:

Chapter 23b

Chapter 24

Ville (POV)

“Come on baby. Please!” My lover begs.

“Bam,” I groan and roll my eyes, but there is still a small smirk on my lips.

“Just one more,” he presses. “Please? And then I’ll stop, I promise.”

“That’s what you said last time, and the time before that,” I counter, placing a cigarette between my lips and lighting up the delicious stick.

“This time I mean it.” Bam crawls over my body until he has his head lying on my chest. The little brat begins to make whimpering noises like a sad puppy. It should have been irritating, but I couldn’t help but smile and stroke his hair. “Come on baby…. Just one more time?”

“Fine,” I sigh, taking a long drag of my smoke. “What’s your request?”

“Something slow and sweet,” he grins. “I like hearing that sexy moan of yours.”

“As you wish darling.”

Taking one last inhale of my smoke, I snub the butt out in the nearest ashtray and clear my throat. Searching my mind for a moment, I try to think of something that would comply to Bam’s request. My grin widens as the perfect solution comes to my mind. It was something simple, but it had been stuck in my thoughts since the night Bam and I last made love; I knew it was perfect for the occasion.

“The kiss sweetest and touch so warm,” I hum lowly, receiving a contented sigh from my lover. “The smile kindest, in this world so cold and strong.”

My fingers trail lightly down from Bam’s scalp, over his neck and down to the exposed skin of his back. I feel him shiver slightly as he lays against me, but he makes no motion for me to stop.

“So close to the flame, burning brightly. It won’t fade away, leave us lonely.”

His warm cheek snuggles closer to my bare chest until it is resting over my heart. Bam’s strong arms wrap themselves around my frame in a strong but gentle embrace. I love this feeling; soft, warm skin against skin.

“The arms safest and words so good. The faith deepest, in this world so cold and cruel.”

Soft lips press against my chest, sending a shiver down my spine. He kisses my body again and it takes my breath away…. I’d better finish this song soon.

“So close to the flame, burning brightly. It won’t fade away, leave us lonely. Close to the flame, burning brightly. Won’t fade away, leave us lonely.”

“Damn,” Bammie sighs in content. “I could listen to you sing all day.”

“You would make me sing all day, wouldn’t you?” I laugh.

“Oh don’t act like you’re not loving the attention,” he counters. “Seriously though, your voice is like, the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Really now?” I ask, raising an eyebrow.

“Yep,” he nods. “In fact its so hot, I think I just got pregnant.”

“Pregnant?” I laugh.

“That’s right,” he confirms. “So you know what this means?” I shake my head. “Well now we’re going to have to get married and live happily ever after.”

“I like that idea,” I grin, squeezing my arm tighter around Bam. “Will we live in a big house with a white picket fence?”

“Hell no. We’re gonna live in a fucking castle.”

“A castle?”

“Yeah,” he nods. “Castle Bam. You’re gonna love it. Its so huge, its even got a tower! I could even put in a recording studio for you.”

“You would do that for me?” I ask.

“Of course I would,” he grins. “Anything for my baby.”

My smile grows wider as I lean forward to kiss his lips softly. My lover’s fingertips move slowly along my chest, little goosebumps forming on the skin his fingertips ghost over. This feels nice, just laying together like this. I enjoy running my fingers up and down his spine while he rests his head on my chest, the heat of skin on skin, and just the whispering of sweet words…. Its better than anything really.

The night had progressed rather quickly after what had happened in the bar. After Bam had professed his love for me and told me how we could go away together, he all but whisked me back to his hotel. One would have thought him to be the great libertine and lover Don Juan the way that he held onto me and whispered sweet words. Even though he knew that there were curious eyes upon us, it didn’t bother him. It was strange…. It was if the whole incidence with Jyrki had taken away all of his fears, like the thought of losing me to another had finally woken him up…. I couldn’t help but wonder if that had been Jyrki’s true intention….

My nose scrunches a little at the thought. Jyrki, despite what had happened, was genuinely a good person and in a strange way, it did feel as if he cared about my well-being… but I didn’t want to think about him right now. No, as I let my eyes gently slip close, I let my mind be filled with the thoughts of what came later this evening. I thought about how Bam had brought me back here, how he made such sweet love to me right here on the sofa, not even caring if his friends came back. We’ve been laying here like this since, holding each other tenderly while I serenaded him until my throat was raw…. I don’t think that I’ve ever been this happy before.

“You know what we should do?” Bam asks suddenly.

“What’s that kulta?”

“We should get like, a matching tattoo,” he suggests. “Something that both of us can share.”

“That sounds like a lovely idea,” I smile, dragging my fingernail lightly down his spine. “I’ve always wanted to get a heart on my wrist…. I love hearts,” I shrug.

“A heart?” He repeats. “Not very manly, is it?”

“Neither is begging another man to woo you with love songs,” I counter.

“Fair enough,” he laughs. “Hearts it is then. We could get our initials put in them too.”

“Why? So if one of us gets lost, they’ll know where we belong?” I smirk.

“Something like that,” he laughs, rolling his eyes. “I’d just like to know that I’m in the center of your heart.”

“I don’t need a tattoo to tell me that,” I whisper. “I love you Bammie.” It feels so good to be able to say those words. But it feels even better to hear this in return….

“I love you too Willa.”

That’s all that I’ve ever wanted and needed to hear. It may seem like its all happened too fast, but maybe that was why it felt so intense. Years of being used and abused, all that I’ve ever needed was this absolute feeling of love and bliss. This is truly where I belonged, right here in his arms and away from all of those cruel things in the world.

Third Person (POV)

Viggo Mortensen was in a foul mood. Though his demeanor did not show it, anyone who knew the pimp would realize that this was the time to keep your distance. At any moment, the glass of brandy he was coolly sipping from could be shattered against the wall. The table he was resting his feet upon could easily be turned over, spilling everything on top onto the ivory colored carpet. Any moment now, those strong, tanned knuckles could be driven through the drywall. This was the most terrifying moment, for those who knew him…. This was the calm before the storm.

What brought on this pimp’s foul mood? The answer was very simple… the day. It had been a bad day for Viggo. The morning had started off as normal as usual. He had gotten up, gone through the morning routine, and even had hopes of just relaxing for the day. Then his world began to intrude. The first call came from his second in command; their new inventory, a small group of Russian boys ages ten to fourteen, were defective. Some were diseased, some had lice, and others were missing teeth; they were no good for sale.

It wasn’t the first time Viggo had been cheated, so he knew how to handle the situation. He didn’t become irritated until the second call of the day from one of his inside men in the Bronx P.D. Apparently, one of his workers, Tuomas, had a rough night. A group of men had cornered him, cracking three of his ribs and fracturing his tibia. He was going to be useless for a few weeks. The situation made Viggo think about the trainers for the derby. What to do with a horse with a broken leg?

After that, the irritations just kept coming. Everyone seemed to have a problem that only he could solve. Though he did like the opportunities to flaunt his power, he didn’t enjoy bearing everyone’s burdens at once, especially not when he had other things on his mind. Then his informant contacted him…. All other thoughts were abandoned as he rushed to the apartment, hoping to catch the bastard this time. He had only caught a glimpse of the man before, not enough to see his full face, but enough to get the small details. The man was of normal height and build, and he had short, dark hair… much like Viggo’s new color. It wasn’t enough though. Viggo wanted to see this man, wanted to know who this man was…. Who was this man Ville was inviting into his home?

Viggo hurried over, racing into the apartment without giving any kind of warning. It wasn’t as if he needed to anyway. He owned the building… he owned Ville, he didn’t need to give warning. The pimp was anxious to catch this person, but he had forced himself to remain calm as he entered into the room, he didn’t want to scare off the man… yet. When he entered though and saw the stranger sitting in the room, he became enraged. He became angry because even at first glance, he knew that it wasn’t the one, this wasn’t the one he had seen before. The boy was too tall, too thin to be the one. This was just some kid… but oddly enough, he looked very familiar. It wasn’t until he heard the boy speak that strange tongue, the language he had heard Ville cry many times before, that he knew there was a connection between his prize whore and this boy.

Ville wouldn’t tell him though. No matter how much he had beaten him and interrogated him, the Finn wouldn’t tell the truth. Even as he slowly choked the life out of him, he just spouted one lie after another. Viggo knew that there was more to it though. He was determined to find whatever it was that his Ville was hiding. It may have just been his paranoid mind, but he knew that there was something, or someone, there that Ville didn’t want him to find. So he looked, turned the entire room upside down until he found something, though it wasn’t what he was looking for. When he saw Ville holding that rose, all of his heated emotions just seemed to fade away and he could only focus on Ville’s beautiful, bruised face.

His Finn wasn’t very responsive as Viggo tenderly treated to the wound on his hand, but it didn’t matter. There were tears in his eyes, but the pimp didn’t focus on the emotion behind them, rather he was amazed at how much they made his emerald eyes sparkle. Viggo had thought it many times before, but he really did consider Ville to be one of the most beautiful things he had ever laid his eyes on…. And as the owner of the beauty, he was entitled to enjoy it whenever he pleased.

The Finn’s body was stiff against him, but that was to be expected. Ville was always tense whenever he took him. He had tried to make up some excuse, to get away from him, but Viggo wasn’t going to let that happen. He had already decided what he wanted, and damn it, he was going to have it. He had pinned Ville against the wall and made him speak the truth, that he would forever belong to the pimp. Hearing the words come forth from those full, luscious lips was all that he needed. He kissed him, caressed him tenderly, but with no reaction. That was ok though, Viggo was used to doing all of the work. When Ville had screamed at him “Don’t”, the pimp had assumed that little Ville was trying to be defiant. It enraged him, yes, but he did his best to handle it calmly.

…Then he kissed him. After eight years of one-sided advances, Ville had embraced him willingly. Not just willingly though, but he was the one who instigated it. To say that he was shocked… well that was a bit of an understatement. The Finn had been obedient in the past, yes, but he had the strongest will of anyone he knew. To think that he had broken him… well, it made him a bit skeptical.

“I was trying to say, don’t stop.”

Viggo could still feel that hot breath against his skin. A shiver went down his spine as he remembered that husky voice. The pimp had always loved Ville’s voice, it was the ting that had first drawn him to the boy after all. His little siren…. He could faintly recall the time when it wasn’t so dark, heavy and… sensual. He could remember a time when it was just the soft voice of a frightened young teen.

Now the boy who had grown into such a lovely man right before his eyes was in his arms, asking for his touch. Maybe it was because he hadn’t ever expected to hear those words, but the pimp was overcoming with a sense of elation and… something else that he couldn’t quite place. He kissed him again, but this time, his little Ville had returned his embrace and put his lips to his skin.

“Minä rakastan sinua,” he had whispered. For the second time within just a few minutes, Ville had surprised him. He didn’t know exactly what Ville had said, but he recognized the words. They were a part of the secret language that he and Jonne had developed; they were words of affection.

Viggo lost control of himself then. He took Ville, right then and there. The pimp didn’t care anymore whether the reaction he received was real or forced, it had just felt so good to be able to enjoy the feel of the Finn’s body once more. It had been some time since he had last bedded the Finn. He had almost forgotten the wonderful feeling of having his legs wrapped around him and the sensations of the tight heat that engulfed his swollen member. Honestly, it was just what Viggo had needed to relieve his tensions, and damn if it didn’t make him feel generous. He tried his best to ensure that his Ville would enjoy the experience as well. It had worked too, Ville had panted, moaned, and screamed for more. He had begged Viggo to let him come…. The screams of ecstasy was pure bliss to the pimp.

Yes, truly it was a pleasure that Viggo wanted to feel over and over again. But he could only ride that euphoric high for so long. After he had left and given himself time to clear the cloud of lust from his head, he began to think about what had happened. Why was that boy in his apartment? Why had Ville been trying to hide the roses under his bed as if they were some sort of dirty secret? Why had he spoken to him with such affection, but then cried under his touch? It didn’t add up.

A low growl is released from parted lips as a now empty glass is thrown against the wall. Shards of glass fall, sparkling like small diamonds in the light as he pants heavily, trying his best to regain his calm. It wasn’t working…. He was angry. He was angry with Ville for whatever it was that he was hiding, but mostly he was angry for allowing himself to become distracted. It wasn’t like him. Viggo always had a clear head and he always got whatever he was after, he wouldn’t be where he was in life if he didn’t after all. But he had let himself become intoxicated by Ville’s touch, he let himself become distracted…. For a moment, he couldn’t help but wonder if that had been Ville’s intention.

Before he could delve further into that thought, he heard a familiar sound. Looking down he sees the glass of his end-table shaking from the vibrations of his phone. With an aggravated sigh, the pimp picks up the device and flips it open without bothering to look at the caller I.D. He didn’t feel the need to at this point. He had an idea of who it was anyway.

“This had better be important,” Viggo hisses into the phone.

“Y- you told me to call,” a nervous voice replies.

The pimp takes a deep breath in hopes to calm himself slightly. It seems that his guess had been correct. “That I did…. What have you got for me then?”

“He’s been gone for a while…”

“…That’s all?” Viggo asks, still waiting for his informant to say more. When all he received was silence in turn, he couldn’t help but let out a humorless laugh. Things just kept coming, didn’t they? “Its twelve-thirty in the morning, and all you have for me is that he’s been gone for a while?”

“Well… you told me to call and…. I- I can’t be around him every moment of the day,” he responds, his voice becoming somewhat accusing. It seems that the little bastard was starting to grow some balls…. Viggo could respect that.

“No,” he sighs. “I suppose that you can’t. But if you want me to keep my part of the deal, you’ll give me something better than that, won’t you?” Silence on the other end, then a loud gulp. He had figured that threat would work.

“…I’ll try to get more info.”

“See that you do.”

Viggo closes his phone and sets it back down on the table. His informant had been lacking lately, almost as if he were covering for someone. What the hell does it take to get a straight answer out of people these days? It used to be that all he had to do was narrow his eyes at someone and they would spill their guts…. What happened? Eh, maybe this was just a sign that he should retire soon. After all, when you lose the fear, you lose the respect and when you lose the respect, well then you lose control…. And Viggo was a man who enjoyed being in control.

The pimp sighs heavily as he tries to rub the headache out of his temples. He was starting to get restless, needed to move around for a bit. He gets up from the sofa and walks over to where the fragments of glass are glittering in the carpet. For a second, he lets out a short laugh. He didn’t think that he threw the glass that hard… good to see that his strength was still in good condition. When that begins to go, that will be the day he leaves the business. Not like he needed the time to save up though. As things were now, he could probably afford a small, non-extraditable island. It did sound like a nice thought actually. He could lay in a hammock all day, soaking up the sun while having tropical drinks and at night he could have…. On second thought, he couldn’t retire just yet. There was still a lot left that he had to do.

He takes his eyes away from the sparkling pieces of glass and walks towards the window, letting himself become hypnotized by the city lights. Blue-green eyes scan the bright cityscape below, wondering if it was him behind each light, if he was searching for him as well.

“Where are you Ville,” he murmurs, his breath forming a fog on the glass. “Where are you….”

---------------------------------------------------------------------

His hand was starting to shake again. Damn it… he had been afraid of this happening. Growling, he balls his hand into a tight fist and bites down on his knuckle. Sadly, it wasn’t helping much. The horrible craving was still there, weighing heavily on his shoulders. Brandon Novak bites down harder on his flesh as he tries his best to fight this terrible urge. I don’t need it. He repeats these words in his head over and over again, hoping that this time he’ll believe it.

It had been almost three weeks since he last felt that delicious poison running through his veins. Three weeks since he felt that wonderful feeling of escape, of being able to leave your mind and body… the feeling of being numb to everything else in the world. He was missing that feeling and something inside of him was screaming for it to return. It was screaming for that needle to puncture his tender skin and give him the promise of heaven… even though it would only lead him to hell.

Though no one had ever said it aloud, Novak knew that his last relapse had been the final straw for his friends. The first time that he realized he needed help, he found that he had a lot of support from those around him. His friends had taken him to rehab, gave him encouraging words, and even came to visit him. For the first time in a long time, he had felt cared about… loved even. So when he relapsed for the first time, he got to have that warm feeling again. After a while, it kind of became a game. He would have himself a little taste of poison, then everyone would rally around him, tell them how much they loved him and beg him to get help…. But after a while, the game got old and no one wanted to play anymore. If he didn’t get his shit together for real this time, then he was going to lose everything.

It was getting hard though, to admit that it was over this time. It had been easy enough to get clean at the rehab clinic (he had done it many times before after all), it was staying that way that was the problem. They had given him some methadone to help with the recovery, but he had gone through that pretty quickly. Support from his friends was non-existent these days, so he had been pretty much on his own…. Well, almost on his own. As the craving begins to subside, he lets out a breath of relief and a small smile creeps on his face. Of course his little pixie would be the one to set him straight.

The smile on his lips grows wider, all previous thoughts of drugs gone now as he leans back and rests his head in his hands. Blue eyes look upwards to the night sky. Jonne thought that he was silly for having suggested a night of stargazing. From the patio of the apartment, one really couldn’t see anything but the light glowing from the streetlamps, reflecting off of the clouds overhead in a weird, yellow haze, no room for stars. But Novak knew that they were there, just waiting to be found. And damn it, he was intent on laying here with his pixie until they found one…. It was the only way he could keep the cravings away.

A cold wind blows suddenly, biting at his skin. He was starting to grow restless, he wanted that lithe body next to him to help keep him warm. Sadly, though this was one of the rare moments when Jonne wasn’t joined to Ville’s side, he was still worried about him. His blonde had been trying to call and text Ville all night, but he was having no luck; it was as if his friend had just dropped off the face of the earth. Novak wasn’t worried though. He had overheard something at the bar about a fight between Jyrki and Bam. The skater didn’t know for sure, but he had a pretty good idea of what the fight had been about. He may not always be the brightest bulb in the shed, but he knew how the lecherous mind worked and he had seen how the singer looked at Ville. It wasn’t his place to get involved though, his only concern was Jonne.

As if on cue, he hears the sound of a door opening slowly behind him. Novak’s heart races a little faster, an anxiousness to feel that sweet, warm body against him. He waits for a few minutes, but sadly, he was still left cold and alone… he didn’t like it. The skater turns his head and is relieved to find that Jonne was standing there, but judging by the look on his face, he wasn’t too happy… then Novak noticed the phone in his hands. Of course….

“Hey baby,” Novak calls, but the blonde makes no movement. “Jonne, come sit down.”

Jonne takes a couple steps forward, but his eyes stay focused on the phone. The skater has to resist the urge to groan and roll his eyes. The man was adorable as can be, but this was one of his more endearing qualities. He was going to have to take his mind off of things if he had any hope of spooning. So, he reluctantly gets up from his comfortable position, walks over to the blonde and takes the device from his hands.

“Hey,” he pouts. “What did you do that for?”

“Stop worrying,” Novak tells him gently. “He’s fine. He’s probably with Bam, doing whatever the hell it is that they do.”

“I know….,” the blonde huffs. “Its just… he didn’t even tell me that he was leaving and he’s not answering my calls. What if-”

Novak cuts off his words by pressing his lips gently to Jonne’s. The blonde is taken off guard by the kiss and all previous thoughts disappear from his mind. The skater pulls back with a cocky, satisfied grin.

“Relax baby,” he whispers. “He’s fine. Stop worrying about him.”

“…I can’t help it,” he sighs.

“I know,” he gives in. “You care… and that’s one of the things I love about you.”

Jonne’s head tilts downwards, a shy smile on his lips. Had there been more light, Novak would have been able to see the flush of crimson that spread across his cheeks. Novak always did say the sweetest things to him.

“Thanks,” Jonne answers quietly, not knowing what else to say.

“Its true babe,” Novak assures, wrapping an arm around his small shoulders. “You always put others before yourself…. Its sweet.”

The smile on Jonne’s lips fade suddenly and he pulls away from the warm arm around him. Curious, Novak tries to pull him back, but Jonne’s wraps his arms around himself, silently telling the skater to stay back.

“Hey,” Novak says, trying to turn Jonne back to him. “What’s wrong?”

“I…it’s nothing,” Jonne stutters.

“You sure?”

“Yeah,” Jonne says, a little too loudly. “I’m fine. Do you want some hot chocolate? Bill made us some.”

Novak furrows his brows in confusion at the sudden change in mood, but Jonne just pushes past him and grabs a coffee mug from the patio table. The blonde hands him the cup, but Novak can’t help but take notice of the forced smile on his face. He didn’t know what he had said, but he should probably avoid the subject. So he takes a sip of the hot liquid, almost spitting it out as it touches his palate.

“What the fuck!?” The skater gags.

“That bad, huh?” Jonne laughs.

“How the hell can you fuck up hot chocolate?” He exclaims, examining the cup of brown liquid.

“That’s what I thought too, so I told him that we would give it a try.”

“The squirt should really stay out of the kitchen,” the skater says, wiping the taste off of his tongue.

“Eh, he’s just learning,” Jonne shrugs. “He’ll get better.”

“Until then, please don’t use me as you guinea pig,” he laughs.

“Fair enough.”

The Finn’s lips thin as he tries to suppress his laughter. It was too cute for Novak to resist. The skater leans forward and gently presses his lips against those soft, pink pillows. This time, the little blonde accepts the embrace, parting his lips to let the gentle, probing tongue inside. Tilting his head to the side, he wraps a slender arm around those broad shoulders to bring his sweet man closer. Strong arms circle around a narrow waist as the kiss deepens. Tongues entwining together, breathes panting heavily, and two bodies becoming flushed and heated… it was all too wonderful.

The skater pulls back, kissing the tip of his upturned nose and leaning his forehead against Jonne’s with a contented sigh. His stares for a while into those aqua colored eyes, perfectly content with becoming lost in them.

“What are you smiling about?” Jonne whispers curiously.

“Just happy,” he shrugs.

“Oh yeah? About what?”

“Kissing you got that awful taste out of my mouth.”

Jonne’s loud, sudden laughter makes Novak jump slightly. He was expecting some kind of reaction, but nothing like that. It had been a while since someone had laughed at his dumb joke… it felt nice.

“Come on,” Novak says, tugging his lover gently. “Let’s look for some stars.”

“Ok,” Jonne agrees, rolling his eyes. “You can’t really see anything out here though.”

“We’ll find something,” he insists.

“Alright,” Jonne sighs, letting go of the skater for a moment. “But since you’re insisting on keeping us out in the cold, I brought a blanket.” Jonne nods towards the blanket laying on the table. Novak smiles, shaking his head as he picks up the blanket.

“Yes mom,” he mocks lightly.

“Well forgive me for not wanting you to catch a cold.”

“I know, I know,” Novak says, rolling his eyes. “Relax baby, I’m only teasing. You know I love your nurturing ways.”

There goes that word again. Not since he was five has a four letter word made Jonne blush so much. He tries to push those thoughts out of his mind though…. It was best not to complicate things any further. So he stays silent as he and Novak lay together on the lawn chair, draping the blanket over them.

Trying to find a comfortable position, Jonne lays his head on the skater’s chest, allowing him to wrap an arm around him, his hand resting on his shoulder. Jonne’s eyes look up towards the sky, but there are no stars… just ugly gray clouds. He squints his eyes, trying to find whatever it is that had made his lover so entranced, but he couldn’t find anything.

“…Brandon,” his meek voice calls.

“Yeah?”

“Um… I was just wondering…. What do you see?”

“…What do you mean?”

“Well… you seemed so intent on doing this and I was just wondering…. What exactly do you see when you look up there?”

“I see stars…,” he answers simply. “Just stars.”

“…Oh.”

“Why?” Novak asks.

“No reason,” Jonne shrugs.

“…I just see stars,” Novak says again. “But its kind of more than that when you think about it.”

“How so?”

“I used to like doing this when I was younger, just looking up at the constellations and making up my own. When I got older though… it just kind of became my way to make things seem a little less real. Like… how can you possibly exist in something so big and timeless. And no matter what you do, whatever happens… it’ll always be the same.”

“Wow… deep thoughts.”

“Yeah,” Novak sighs. “It kinda hurt.”

Jonne’s laughter is softer this time, a bit easier on Novak’s ears. The skater smirks and runs his fingers through that soft, golden hair. “You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself,” Jonne says softly, wrapping an arm around his muscular frame.

“What do you mean baby?”

“Y- you’re always making jokes about yourself and letting your friends call you names…. I- I just think that you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. You’re better than you give yourself credit for.”

Silence for a while and then the feel of soft lips against his forehead. Jonne sighs in content, nuzzling closer to his lover’s chest until he can hear that soothing heartbeat. Jonne’s long fingers trail up and down Novak’s sides and he smiles as the heartbeat begins to increase. Looking back towards the sky, he sees a part in the clouds. A small sliver revealing the ink black sky and a single little dot… a single star.

“Hey Jonne, you see that?” Novak asks, squeezing the small shoulder gently.

“Yeah,” he grins. “I see it.”

“Told you we’d find some,” he says proudly.

“Yeah… you did.”

Jonne’s eyes stay fixed on the small, white dot and he began to think about all that Novak had said… it had made sense. Looking up into something so vast and eternal, nothing seemed real. He rather liked that idea actually. No, he wouldn’t really mind it at all if everything else just faded away. There would be no hurtful past, no bleak future, no more lies or secrets. If everything were to just disappear, maybe then he would have some peace.

“You smell like strawberries,” the skater whispers suddenly.

“What?” Jonne laughs.

“Your hair, it smells like strawberries,” he repeats. Jonne is left slightly speechless, his mind searching for some kind of witty comment. His thoughts are interrupted however, when he feels his hair being tugged gently and the sound of… slurping.

“Brandon…. Are you chewing on my hair?”

“…Yeah.”

“Um… why?” Jonne asks, trying to hold back an amused smirk. He flips himself over so that he can look his skater in the eyes. Well, he would have looked into his eyes, but Novak was avoiding his gaze with an embarrassed expression.

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. “…I like strawberries. Is that weird?”

“Yes,” Jonne nods. Novak bites his lower lip, deeply regretting his curious decision. Before he can apologize for it though, Jonne leans forward to capture his lips. “Its weird,” Jonne whispers. “But its just one of the things I love about you.”

Brandon is taken off guard for a moment, completely at a loss of words. When Jonne’s words finally sink in, he grins widely and pulls him closer, pressing their lips firmly together. Jonne smirks. He wasn’t quite sure what had brought this on, but he doesn’t hesitate to kiss back with equal enthusiasm. Tilting his head, Jonne parts his lips and presses the tip of his tongue to Novak’s, silently asking for entrance. The skater is all to happy to oblige to the request and allows the probing appendage to enter. Unlike the previous kiss, where it felt as if they were trying to devour each other, the ministrations are a slow, light caress.

The clouds, as if waiting for the perfect, most clichéd moment, decide to part over the lovers. Gray splotches dissipate revealing dozens of little lights in the sky. The constellation of Orion appears partially overhead, along with other patterns that never really had a name. Novak’s eyes open and he catches a glimpse of the dazzling lights above.

“Jonne, look,” he says in quiet excitement.

Jonne doesn’t comply at first, but instead rolls his eyes and laughs quietly to himself. I’m kissing you, and all you can think about is stars? He keeps those words to himself though, knowing that this was important to Novak. So he turns his head back to see the sky and for a moment, he saw what Novak was so excited about. In all his life, the blonde had never really taken the time to just enjoy something so simple as this…. It was beautiful. It was like watching…

“Fireflies.”

“What’s that babe?”

“Fireflies,” Jonne whispers. “They look like fireflies…” He shakes his head to remove those thoughts from his mind. He didn’t need to think about them now. “I’m glad we did this,” he sighs, letting himself fall gently onto his lover’s chest.

“Me too,” Novak smiles, kissing the top of Jonne’s head.

He runs his fingers through the soft hair as his eyes stay focused on the stars. Indeed, he was glad that he had suggested this. Nothing else seemed real, nothing else seemed to matter as long as he lie there with the warm body over him… loving him. This was all he needed, not that poison coursing through his veins… just this.

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It seemed like hours had passed since he had first begun his staring contest with the ceiling. His mind was blank as his jade eyes stayed focused on the tiny holes in the ceiling. He had tried counting them all at first, got up to fifty-seven before growing bored with it. Now he just watched them until his eyes started playing tricks on him and the holes blurred and moved around…. Funny the lengths you’ll go to keep from thinking about things.

Jesse had been lying in his stiff hotel bed for some time now, just trying to empty his mind of everything. He had been trying to do this all day to no avail. Then again, he wasn’t really given any other distractions to help him. His best friend, Dylan, was being a dick and avoiding him. When Jesse had gone with Bam earlier that day, he begged to come, but the situation had been too personal to involve him. Now he was acting like a brat, as if Jesse had gone off on some wild adventure without him…. Whatever, he’ll get over it. He did wish that his friend was there though, if anything just to help keep him distracted.

The teen rolls over on his side, his eyes stinging and dry from having stared so long into space. He closes his eyes to make the stinging go away and hopefully fall asleep, but sadly his body’s exhaustion wasn’t as great as his mind’s. Damn it, was anything going to turn out well for him today? First he wakes up with a terrible headache this morning, then he discovers his long-lost brother, and now this…. Seriously, he would give his left nut for this day to just end.

There’s a knock on the door and Jesse groans loudly. He really didn’t want to get up right now, but he figured that Dylan had forgotten his room key again. He should really just leave his ass locked out to teach him a lesson, but he could never be that mean. So, he forces himself off of the bed and goes to the door, however, it was not his best friend who had been knocking.

“Hey,” Sarah smiles nervously. “Can I come in?”

Even though Jesse was really not in the mood for company, he knew that he could never deny Sarah. One look into those big doe eyes and he was pudding. So he looks out into the hallway, making sure there were no teachers around and gestures for her to quickly come inside. The girl sprints inside, throwing herself down onto the large bed as Jesse quickly shuts the door. Now this was a sight he didn’t mind, Sarah Parker lying on his bed with a serene expression on her face.

For the first time in the last few hours, Jesse cracks a genuine smile and flops down on the bed next to her. Sarah was one of Jesse’s best friends and perhaps one of the strangest girls he knew. The two had first met in elementary school, where she and Dylan were known as the class misfits. The girl had taken one look at Jesse and proclaimed him to be their third musketeer, whether he agreed to it or not. Since then, the three of them had been inseparable throughout their school careers.

It wasn’t until the beginning of high school that Jesse’s feelings for her began to change. He didn’t know how it happened, but somehow his gawky, awkward friend had overnight become a very beautiful young lady. The teen didn’t know whether it was love or just typical teenage hormones, but all he wanted was to be around her. So to have her here, in his bed… well it just made his day.

“So what the hell’s been up with you today?” She asks, rolling over on her side to face him. The smile fades from Jesse’s face as he turns over onto his back, his eyes going back to the ceiling.

“What are you talking about?” He mumbles.

“This,” she answers, poking his cheek. “I’m talking about this moody face…. If you keep this up, you’re going to have serious frown lines.”

“I thought you always said that lines make you look distinguished,” he smirks.

“I said that laugh lines make you look distinguished,” he explains. “Frown lines just make you look like a grumpy old man…. So seriously, what’s up? You’ve been kinda distant all day.”

“Just… not having the best day,” he sighs.

“Really?” She asks. “Cause Dylan’s been telling everyone that you went partying with the guys from Jackass. Doesn’t sound like a bad day to me.”

“… Dylan doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about,” he murmurs.

“Ah… so you’re not going to be recruited into doing insane stunts for a cheap laugh? Too bad,” she shrugs. “The girls would have been all over you. Holly was wanting you to come down to her room later. ”

“Yeah…. Not gonna happen,” Jesse laughs. He scoots closer to his friend, trying to resist the overwhelming urge to put his arm around her shoulder. Jesse didn’t care about the superficial girls in the class, he only wanted Sarah.

She smiles at the sound of Jesse’s laughter and throws her arm over his stomach, resting her head on his chest. “So seriously Jess, what’s wrong?”

“What makes you think there’s anything wrong?” He replies weakly.

“I’ve known you since we were eight; I can tell when you’re in a bad mood. So come on, spill your guts.”

Jesse closes his eyes and takes a deep, calming breath. Sarah and Dylan were the only two people in the world that he could tell anything to… but he wasn’t so sure about this. After all, how would he even begin to explain what he had seen? He had found his brother, but it wasn’t the big reunion he had always dreamed of. Who was that man who burst into the apartment and why did Ville seem so afraid of him? What had his brother being doing for the past eight years and why did he get the feeling that he was in danger?

“Jess? You still alive?”

“Barely,” he sighs.

“You went away there for a minute. Where’d you go?”

“Somewhere far, far away….”

Sarah was starting to get worried about him; he knew it. He loved the girl, but he knew that this wasn’t something that he could share with her. This was a secret that he had to keep, for the sake of his brother. So his mind went to the only plausible excuse he could think of for his terrible mood.

“My mom called me earlier.”

“Oh,” she says, knowingly. “What’d she say this time? The usual ‘come home soon or you’ll break my heart’?”

“Something like that,” he smirks. She knew his mother far too well. Anita Valo’s over-protectiveness and worried mind had been the butt of many of his friend’s jokes, but they didn’t even know the half of it. Jesse can vaguely remember a time when she wasn’t so paranoid and afraid, but that was so long ago.

“I wish you could have known her before she got all weird. You would have liked her.”

“What made her change?” She asks curiously.

“…Life got in the way,” he answers. He didn’t want to explain how much Ville’s disappearance had changed his mother. Yes, his friends were aware of his big brother’s existence, but that was all. They didn’t know about Jesse waking one morning to find his only brother gone, about the years of searching until they had given up hope. They didn’t need to know about that, and he didn’t want them to.

“Hey Sarah,” he says her name timidly.

“Yeah?”

“I-if someone asked you to keep a secret, even though it would hurt someone else, would you?”

Sarah’s face shows her confusion as she turns herself over to look into her friend’s eyes. “I’m not following you.”

“Um…,” Jesse bites his lip, regretting having said anything. “Well, say you had this big secret. Its really important that you keep it, but at the same time it would make other people happy if you told. What would you do?”

“I… I don’t know,” she shrugs. “I guess it would depend on what the secret is.”

“For arguments sake, let’s say it’s a big one.”

“Ok then,” she says, thinking it over for a moment. “Well, I think that you would have to consider the lesser of two evils in that situation. Is this one secret worth the feelings of others?”

“…I honestly don’t know.”

“Jesse… you’re starting to worry me. What the hell is going on with you?”

“I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”

“I wish you would tell me,” she says lowly. “You’re one of my best friends…. I hate to see you upset.”

“I know,” he replies, giving her a weak smile. “I think this is just something that I’m going to have to work out for myself.”

“Alright,” she nods. Her worry is still evident, but she tries to push it to the back of her mind. All she wants is to comfort her friend. Laying her head back down to his chest, she hugs him tightly and smiles when she feels his arm come around her. “I’m here for you though, ok. So don’t be afraid to let me in.”

She’ll never know how much those words meant to him and how badly he wanted to act on them. Jesse would have loved to let her in, if anything just so he wouldn’t have to carry this burden alone. But what good would it have done? She wouldn’t have known what to do in this situation, no one would.

“Jesse?”

“Yeah,” he answers softly.

“I-is this secret that you’re keeping for someone important?”

“…Yeah, it is.”

Even though he had the girl he loves lying on him, trying to comfort him, he couldn’t enjoy it. He should be trying to get the gumption to actually make a move, but instead his mind is too clouded by thoughts of his brother. Ville… what have you done?
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